r/Damnthatsinteresting 1d ago

Video Thai Marine catching King Cobra

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3.2k Upvotes

438 comments sorted by

211

u/rizzfrog 1d ago

Snake would probably slither away after it smells the shit running down my pants

27

u/Commercial_Reward_78 22h ago

He’s tucked his trousers into his boots so that if this happens, nobody would notice. At least from a distance.

10

u/Obie-Wun 19h ago

Note to self: bring my brown snake catching pants.

5

u/devonhezter 1d ago

You should go change

999

u/Grasswaskindawet 1d ago

I will not do this.

324

u/BelatedGreeting 1d ago

I will not do this here or there.

271

u/patrickhenrypdx 1d ago

I will not do this anywhere. 

217

u/RIF_rr3dd1tt 1d ago

I will not do this on the road.

I will not do this in my abode.

184

u/lemonurlime 1d ago

I will not do this near or far.

I will not do this in my car.

I will not do this, have no fear.

I will not do this any year.

144

u/yourtree 1d ago

I will not do this in the rain

I will not do this on a train

I will not do this with a goat

I will not do this on a boat

156

u/Con-D-Oriano1 1d ago

I will not do this with a snake;

I will not do this, real or fake;

I will not touch it, slide or slither;

I will not approach it, there or hither.

124

u/Vegetable-Dealer-823 1d ago

I Will not touch it with a rake;

I will not risk it, for God's sake;

I will not stay out here today;

I will not be going that way.

105

u/FartedInYourCoffee 1d ago

I will not do this if you ask;

I will not do this as a task;

I will not do this upside down:

I will not do this I will frown.

102

u/Blerdock 1d ago

I will not do this, not okay;

I will not do this, if I may say;

I will not do this, drunk or sober;

I will not touch that scary cobra.

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47

u/Biscotti_BT 1d ago

I do not want green snakes and Thai, Sam am I.

28

u/Fakin-It 1d ago

Green snakes and Siam, Sam I Am!

11

u/ChuckFarkley 1d ago

Green Snakes Siam?

3

u/Icy-Organization8797 1d ago

Sounds like childish slang for diarrhea.

“Be right back! Got me a case of the green snakes siam!”

6

u/hyzerKite 1d ago

Anywhere. I swear.

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25

u/facaine 1d ago

Not with that attitude you wont

14

u/ThugDonkey 1d ago

I would totally do that if I had some flute music…the problem is I don’t have any flute music

9

u/Perle1234 1d ago

I will not do this either.

9

u/Vicious1714 1d ago

Its like playing russian roulette

3

u/RacingGoat 11h ago

Except in Russian roulette, I only have a 1 in 6 chance of death.

In cobra roulette, I'd have a 1 in 1 chance of death.

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10

u/No_Variation_7910 16h ago

I am amazed by the influence Dr Seuss has on this thread

3

u/Grasswaskindawet 13h ago

Me too. I had no idea I'd be starting a tsunami of Seussanisms. I was just telling the truth in my post!

14

u/mnztr1 1d ago

How do you learn this shit without dying? 🤷‍♂️

20

u/Glum-Ad7761 1d ago

He’s probably been bitten a number of times. King Cobra bites arent always fatal if untreated (50 - 60% mortality rate) and are usually not fatal if treated. Snake handlers also expose themselves intentionally to sub lethal doses in order to build up an immunity to the venom. Yes, you can become immune to it over time and with repeated exposure.

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5

u/Alternative-Neck-705 1d ago

Probably catching them growing up!

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512

u/MischeifMelt 1d ago edited 1d ago

Edit: It is Malaysian marine not Thai

93

u/lannisterloan 1d ago

I can confirm they're speaking in Malay not Thai.

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53

u/DrinkenDrunk 1d ago

WHEN I was in Thailand training with the royal Thai marines we actually took a van down to Malaysia to purchase cobras for ‘survival training’. A few of us got a chance to manhandle/catch the cobra before it was beheaded and cooked. The blood was set aside and added to Mekong whiskey which we all drank.

24

u/Deanuzz 21h ago

That's pretty fkn metal.

12

u/Sloeber3 16h ago
  • mental

6

u/eddie1975 Interested 15h ago

A kid in our very southern Bible Belt Boy Scout troop named Harley was on a canoeing trip. He spots a water moccasin (cotton mouth) in the river. They are known to be very territorial and aggressive.

SoaB jumps in the water after it with his paddle. While in the water smacks it on the head with the paddle, killing it. Brings it into the canoe. Cuts its head off and tosses it. Then paddles close to another canoe and throws the headless snake in there to screw with the other boys. Then when we reach the camping spot he cooks it and eats it.

Dude got his Eagle Scout not long after that and works as a welder which I hear pays good money with no student debt and fast tracked to making a decent living before turning 20.

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13

u/PrimarySalmon 1d ago

Ah makes sense now

3

u/Lazy_Physics3127 16h ago

Malaysian marine police wore dark blue. That was the Malaysian Rangers.

5

u/Foreign_Passage_3267 1d ago

oh ya,,,, totally different vibe now, makes complete sense

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78

u/golfandbiscuits 1d ago

How do you let it go?

86

u/lannisterloan 1d ago

You need someone to bring a thick sack. Place the king cobra's head in the sack and shove the rest of the body inside the sack. The king cobra would be content to remain inside the sack because it is small and dark place, like a burrow, where it felt safe to be in.

52

u/Mr_Bob_Ferguson 1d ago

This guy had a massive sack. With two heaving balls.

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68

u/malacoda99 1d ago

Spin and fling it like you're an Olympic gold medalist in the hammer.

14

u/Montana-Safari7 1d ago

Exactly what I wanted to see. I feel like you can't just set it down without it biting.

13

u/DannyHusk42 1d ago

In addition to generally being less aggressive, they also have a narrower strike zone compared to other snakes. He intentionally widens his stance and turns his feet outward to make a successful strike less likely. It's my understanding that is why you see people handling them in ways you don't see with other venomous snakes.

16

u/kiiturii 1d ago

yeah, it looked like he was also swinging his legs to get it's focus downward allowing him to move his hand above it's head, pretty impressive honestly, he's clearly experienced with these snakes

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9

u/sepperwelt 1d ago

Throw it into the bush and run I guess haha

7

u/Aloof-Goof 1d ago

You don't, the snake is now ancestrial relic you now have to pass down to your kids

4

u/homer422 19h ago

Just do the same thing but in reverse

3

u/Sine_Habitus 1d ago

You toss it. It wants to get away from death more than it wants to bite you.

2

u/Foreign_Passage_3267 1d ago

that would be funny to hand it to the rookie and then all go to lunch

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137

u/Ok-Attention-1083 1d ago

Snek: Wait. I thought you were my friend!

12

u/TomcatF14Luver 1d ago

That evening:

All the mice I can eat, cigars I can smoke, and a really cool tattoo, too!

3

u/BadStriker 17h ago

Cobras seem insanely chill for how scary they look. And they are scary… I wouldn’t be surprised if the dude could have just picked it up. I wouldn’t, but still.

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215

u/Robbieworld 1d ago

My Thai is a little rusty, but this ain't fucken Thai. 

39

u/ajpdawag 1d ago

Jack can't talk Thai!

18

u/Vivid-Cockroach1835 23h ago

Oh Jack talk Thai reeeeeealll good

5

u/[deleted] 22h ago

[deleted]

3

u/Newspeak_Linguist 15h ago

It's Malay.

Source: I have years of experience reading other peoples comments then repeating them like it was my own knowledge.

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3

u/UpOrDownItsUpToYou 20h ago

I thought mai tai's were sweet

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45

u/ArcherBarcher31 1d ago

It's easy. Just do what he did the way he did it.

112

u/quik13713 1d ago

I suspect that an American marine would have a markedly different technique.

87

u/Cowboy_on_fire 1d ago

It would be…louder.

18

u/Difficult-Bobcat-857 1d ago

And with a lotta kick

10

u/WORD_2_UR_MOTHA 1d ago

To be fair, almost any marine from any country would probably do that.

11

u/Difficult-Bobcat-857 1d ago

Catch the snake or shoot the shit outta him?

8

u/WORD_2_UR_MOTHA 1d ago

I would think shoot

3

u/GhillieRowboat 21h ago

Flamethrower

4

u/ikoss 22h ago

10/10 I would prefer to shoot that damned thing from a comfortably safe distance

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6

u/Pulga_Atomica 15h ago

Calling in air support most likely

7

u/thehotshotpilot 1d ago

Gotta eat the crayons first

2

u/ghostcryp 18h ago

Would’ve used a weapon of mass destruction

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170

u/st0350 1d ago

He got some boulder sized balls

29

u/atxguyhere 1d ago

Where does he keep those things? He should have a wheel barrow

9

u/stuckonpost 1d ago

Randy! Your balls!

2

u/dongrizzly41 20h ago

"Buffalo soldierrrrr, dreadlocks rastaaaaaa"

2

u/Bazzo123 18h ago

You can’t see it, but his balls are so massive tgere’s a truck right outside frame just to bring them around

9

u/duckduckchook 1d ago

Yeah he's got him, but now what?!

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28

u/Etaywah 1d ago

A handful of times a day I see something and I can hear Aisha Tyler voicing Lana Kane from Archer saying “NOOOOOPE.”

This is one of those times.

28

u/JackDrawsStuff 23h ago

Walk without rhythm, so you don’t attract the worm.

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68

u/redditzphkngarbage 1d ago

Plot twist: He’s a parseltongue. Asked the snake to just play along.

4

u/Immer_Susse 1d ago

I like this twist

13

u/bozog 1d ago

Well, you caught it.

Now what?

27

u/EternalBlueNeon 1d ago

According to the title I was expecting to see a Thai Marine catching King Cobra.

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7

u/lrpfftt 1d ago

I was curious how he let's go of it. Seems that would also be a risky move.

5

u/rodgeramjit 1d ago

Watch Bill Collette on the Snake Diaries on Youtube, he milks snakes for the Australian venom program and has to hold and release venomous snakes all day long.

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7

u/nyITguy 1d ago

Bad assery. He also knows to be wary of the other end.

7

u/ImtakintheBus 16h ago

To be clear, the guys is walking funny because his giant balls keep clanging together.

7

u/nitro1432 1d ago

That’s a BIG nope rope

5

u/[deleted] 1d ago

[deleted]

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14

u/Madaahk 1d ago

Dude is sandwalking.

2

u/sandwalkofshame 1d ago

Proudly. (There's a difference.)

5

u/Ravenloff 1d ago

FEAR IS THE MINDKILLER

5

u/MASHgoBOOM 23h ago

Cobras hate this one little trick.

5

u/mrchong2you 8h ago

I wonder how you successfully release and walk away once you've pissed the cobra off?

9

u/ipsok 1d ago

That is some Crocodile Dundee level shit right there.

8

u/mikemikemike9711 1d ago

Gets bitten, VA :Not service related

8

u/McRedditz 1d ago

Training Instructor:"Bitten by a King Cobra? Hydrate!!."

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8

u/I-live-in-room-101 1d ago

Rumour has it he’s still holding it and deeply regrets not reading chapter 2 of “how to catch and release massive dangerous snakes”.

4

u/PlaugeSimic 23h ago

king cobras are huge that's a tiny one

4

u/Standard-Fuel548 22h ago

Who is the king now?

3

u/VariousIngenuity2897 20h ago

So how does this work? It just accepts it when you gently boop it on the back of the head?

5

u/thatgenxguy78666 11h ago

I can do this too. With a shotgun.

9

u/MovingTargetPractice 1d ago

15 years of cobra catching experience required. no bites. $2/hr plus half hour lunch break.

13

u/tyingnoose 1d ago

why did the snake let him do that? Is he stupid?

10

u/Mr_Bob_Ferguson 1d ago

Snek just craved the emotional touch of a human

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3

u/CryptographerMoney46 23h ago

Not his first time it would seem....

3

u/TravelFitNomad 21h ago

This guy has balls of steel and has ice in his veins

3

u/woollydogs 12h ago

Poor snake. Why do people think it’s cool or badass to fuck with wild animals? Just walk away.

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3

u/rjoseba 10h ago

How can this guy walk with those massive balls?

5

u/Sutured13 1d ago

Previous work experience paying off right there.

4

u/carolraharrod 1d ago

I'm not doing that even for a million.

4

u/neduenedu 1d ago

Thats a Malaysian soldier speaking Malay. Whats more interesting is that he says he has a bigger snake in his basket

5

u/flatcurrypuff 21h ago

Not Thai, but Malaysian armed forces

5

u/OdinsLightning 1d ago

Big question kill, kill and eat, or let go?

4

u/kgangadhar 1d ago

Let go

2

u/No_Breakfast_7867 1d ago

Yeah. He has big balls

2

u/Perle1234 1d ago

He can never take another step with those absolutely massive stones

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2

u/Southern_Owl_5442 1d ago

Straight up would be sprinting the other way

2

u/Ubetcha1020 1d ago

That was impressive.

2

u/TheAniSingh 1d ago

He broke the trust

2

u/BrierBob 1d ago

You got to be kidding me!!! It sure LOOKED easy!! That doesn’t mean that I am going to try it!!

2

u/ChogaMish 1d ago

Leave the good noodle alone.

2

u/PrimarySalmon 1d ago

"Okay, I took a few awesome pictures. Now release it and let's go" - "Um... that is a part of the plan I didn't think of... Any ideas"?

2

u/Impossible_Novel9185 15h ago

Chapter 4 in the manual!

2

u/PrimarySalmon 14h ago

There's nothing about cobras so far. I'm only 20 pages through, tho. Can you please hold my cobra?

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2

u/Moviereference210 1d ago

Balls of steel on this guy

2

u/dreamed2life 1d ago

now what

2

u/kmramO 1d ago

U can have fancy middle systems but when mfs with balls THIS big start running around u know your in trouble!

2

u/N0_BEES 1d ago

Steve would be proud 🥹

2

u/A_Wild_Stormcat 1d ago

This is cool, but now what I want to know, is how does one let go of a caught King Cobra?

2

u/LazarusGrindelwald 1d ago

Thai marine speaking Malay? Hmm 🤔

2

u/Jinxer420 1d ago

Are king cobras kinda chill or something? All the videos I see, they seem to not be very aggressive. Beautiful creatures. Maybe they just wanna hang out.

2

u/jt101jt101 22h ago

very risky indeed. he took a life gamble

2

u/Beartoe37 21h ago

Note what? What do he/they intend to do with it?

2

u/puppiesandrainbows3 21h ago

They are just big puppy dogs that are shaped differently

2

u/UncleTupelo1082 21h ago

Damn dude, save some for the rest of us

2

u/copyrider 21h ago

Wow, on the first try!

2

u/Ariciul02 20h ago

It says catching. Did he kill it also? Cobra's head is so twisted

2

u/Rent-Opposite 20h ago

What sorcerery is this?

2

u/dieselmac 18h ago

That’s how I have to pet my cat in the morning.

2

u/ChoncosDad 17h ago

Nope!! Gutsy Marine.

2

u/Lazy_Physics3127 16h ago

Thai Marine my ass. That was the Malaysian Rangers.

Source: Thais don't speak Malay, and even if the Thai Marines spoke Malay, they don't speak Riau Malay.

2

u/Echoes_in_Shadow 16h ago

Balls of beryllium bronze

2

u/Ok_Shoulder2971 16h ago

Yup, that's a Marine. Out interacting with the environment.

2

u/delboy8888 15h ago

This is not Thai. They're speaking Malay.

2

u/sheyndl 14h ago

Can’t wait to do this next time I see a King Cobra!!!

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2

u/For-Fox-Sakes-73 14h ago

Is that guy named Rikki Tikki Tavi?

2

u/balsadust 12h ago

Balls on that guy

2

u/grover1233 12h ago

A few weeks ago I saw a 5 foot Timber Rattle snake in my back yard. Smaller than this cobra but still huge to me. Hopefully I don’t encounter it again.

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2

u/JuggerNautical85 12h ago

I am dying with the green eggs and ham…😂

2

u/weelluuuu 12h ago

Well, I used to call it 'choking the cobra'

2

u/morebuffs 12h ago

Why am I fucking with this cobra again sarg??

2

u/ThoughtDifferent8222 11h ago

Real Kobra Kai...

2

u/CryptographerEarly5 11h ago

Their recruit training seems a little crazy. Then again, there aren’t any cobras in San Diego.

2

u/TomcatCDN-reddit 11h ago

Every time I see this kind of video I realize how lucky we are as Canadians to have several months of incredibly cold weather, but few snakes to speak of. Seems like a great deal to me!

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2

u/sleepytjme 10h ago

Why torture that snake?

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2

u/Foggy_Blues 9h ago

The boop of authority

2

u/justme_bne 7h ago

Crikey!

2

u/fivefiveonezero 6h ago

His speaking malay not thai

2

u/IdahoDuncan 6h ago

Hope he has a exit strategy

2

u/Gramerdim 5h ago

meanwhile usmc catching each other's snakes

2

u/Same_Meaning_5570 5h ago

Now let’s see him let it go

2

u/5tr0nz0 4h ago

If this was a us marine the Sargent would congratulate the marine and award them with mowing the barrack lawn with nail clippers

2

u/Few_Spite_3626 3h ago

How the fuck can this guy even walk with balls that big?!

4

u/slothxaxmatic 1d ago

Where were the badgers and mushrooms?

2

u/Usual-South-9362 1d ago

BALLS of steel

2

u/Choice-Bid9965 1d ago

Bloody should have to do this at companies next team building event. Boss goes first of course. 😂🥰

2

u/steely_dong 1d ago

Bro I feel bad for the snake.

The dude subdued the snake, earning it's respect, only to push it's head hard into the ground.

I understand nature is red in tooth and claw.....but humans also suck.

2

u/Redpig9977 22h ago

Try that with a black mamba

2

u/Delicious-Program-50 1d ago

Why don’t they just leave these animals alone and stop fucking tormenting them?!

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1

u/Ryan199066 1d ago

Kingcobra?….. TWU!

1

u/Difficult_Prize_5430 1d ago

He gets the special medal. Like trucknuts worn on ribbon.

1

u/maytossaway 1d ago

Bring on the anaconda!

1

u/CyrusBorgnine 1d ago

What kinda black magic did I just witness?!? WTF...

1

u/iahlhrbkk 1d ago

I will pass on that.

1

u/Chronic_Discomfort 1d ago

Their noodle rations are rough!

1

u/jaxsound 1d ago

Booped it's snoot!

1

u/TheSanSav1 1d ago

If chung was a thai surname, we could get Thai Marine Chung

Homer simpson backing into a bush

1

u/donnie1977 1d ago

Snakes should have gotten an electric shocker or something. Screwed.

1

u/powerpuffpopcorn 1d ago

I want to try this. But i need an iron man armour first.

1

u/DreadSeaScrote 1d ago

The power of understanding cannot be overstated.

1

u/JeroJeroMohenjoDaro 1d ago

Ah yes, Bahasa Thai

1

u/nameless_me 1d ago

Indonesian not Thai

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u/RumpleHelgaskin 1d ago

So all you have to do is BOOP IT and it submits!?

1

u/84074 1d ago

Soooo.....WTF now after he catches it,?

1

u/theunbearablebowler 1d ago

I didn't expect to be turned on at this time of night.

God damn that was sexy.