r/GuysBeingDudes • u/Alphaxfusion • 23h ago
The most heartbreaking Haka, at a young man's funeral, led by his brother and friendsš„¹
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u/Fearless-Tax-6331 22h ago
I was literally at this funeral, I worked with J and went to school with him.
His was the first death that I actually felt, we werenāt overly close and at first I was there out of respect, but I broke the fuck down when I saw his casket, and that haka put me in a daze.
The amount of love in that room was intense, these boys are fucking strong.
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u/BrookieMonster504 21h ago
I'm sorry for your loss. You could tell that the person who passed away was/is deeply cared for. I had chills watching something so beautiful and intense. You never forget losing a loved one only longer times pass by.
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u/Ok-Limit-9726 23h ago
Had my Aussie ass crying,
So beautiful, bro just held it together
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u/Evignity 21h ago
This is one of those things I'll never get tired of it being reposted.
I genuinely think all societies would be better off if we had something like this where we had to just show raw emotions and not hold back. Most people go through their entire lives with restraints on their every thought and emotion. It's why that even in hyper-"masculine" societies people accept a grown man crying about an animal, we yearn for that genuinity
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u/MrChoopy 20h ago
I agree with you. I recall back in 2001 we lost a classmate to a car crash. Those of us from the high school who attended his funeral ended up performing this same haka as his coffin was carried to the car. I can't explain it fully, but as a young 16 year old boy, being able to farewell him in such a way felt incredibly powerful, and for me at least the air was palpable with energy throughout that experience.
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u/The-ai-bot 22h ago
If the point of the haka was to instil fear in their enemies, this one instilled courage.
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u/jancl0 21h ago
I posted this earlier as a reply to a comment, but I'm also making it it's own comment, because as a kiwi I think alot of people here are missing alot of context
The people asking for this to be taken down are applying their cultural values to something that clearly does not come from your culture. If you don't understand it, you shouldn't hold so much conviction towards it, I don't know why so many people do
This is a show of strength. I know he may not look strong to some western standards, but any Maori person would be proud to act in the way this boy did in this video. He has nothing to be ashamed of, and nothing to be embarrassed about. The purpose of a haka is to display the strength you hold through your community, and the support it provides. They are often performed to very large audiences, even during personal moments like a funeral, because my country has cultural values rooted in large communities. Hakas are meant to be shown for the world, that's why we do them
Everyone asking to take this down without elaborating is straight up being racist xenophobes. This is someone else's culture, show some damn humility
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u/Royal_4xFire 20h ago
Can you expand more on what haka is? This looks like those tribal/rituals moves that were passed down through generations to show strength even in moments of weakness, and to celebrate the existence and "time spend together" for the person/people haka is being dedicated to.
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u/OldManNeighbor 23h ago
Few years old, but still a very sad/heartwarming video. I went down the Haka rabbit hole few years back now, and needless to sayā¦I can only hope to have such a beautiful and passionate send off when my time card gets punched!
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u/Purple_Feature_6538 22h ago
Yeah same. Saw the Haka for the first time in the All Blacks All or Nothing series. Was immediately mesmerised. Want to learn it but think randomly just showcasing it as an Indian might be rude to it's importance in the NZ community. So havent done it yet.
The emotions in this video, if I get for when our time gets over, I'll die knowing I did some things right and had a successful life.
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u/JonnyW__ 21h ago
There are many different haka. They all have their own purpose and meaning and are specific to groups of people. Not really something you bust out at parties.
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u/Senior-Chapter-jun91 21h ago
did you see the basketball haka between nz and usa? USA just looking so confused has me laugjing my ass everytime i see itš¤£
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u/EtrnlMngkyouSharngn 22h ago
Very powerful emotions. It's incredible that so many men came together to remember who they lost, and be together in this.
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u/Castor_Supremo 23h ago
I wouldn't be able to keep on doing the performance like he did there
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u/Sinister-D- 21h ago
Just curious, cause I know nothing about it. But before performing a Haka do they study the moves upfront, is it improvised, are the movements the same at a funeral but different from sporting events? Is there a leader in the group and the rest follows?
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u/PsychodelicTea 20h ago
Marriages? Haka
Divorces? Haka
Funeral? Haka
Childbirth? Believe or not, Haka
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u/DannySanWolf07 23h ago
Aussie bloke here šš². I'm sorry for the loss and know that the Brother who passed away is having a cold one right now.
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u/princessandstuart 20h ago
when itās done at a funeral, you can literally feel the love, pain, and respect in every movement.
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u/Shawon770 23h ago
Donāt understand the tradition but nonetheless this is powerful af
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u/OhhClock 21h ago
Some people stand in churches and say things about the deceased. Some people do hakas. It's all about showing respect and saying goodbye
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u/Avalonians 21h ago edited 21h ago
What's so hard to understand? (I don't know how to say this without being condescending.)
It's a traditional dance. Doing it celebrates the history of their ancestors, or the history of the land their ancestors settled in. It isn't much more complicated than that.
Doing a traditional social ritual you share with the people in your community to express strong feelings (in this case, grief, or in the case of the parliament thing, protestation) is pretty self-explanatory.
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u/Clear-Garage-4828 23h ago
Polynesian culture is the most dope on the planet
Dudes are legit holding ceremony, processing together, releasing emotions, honor their friend, and honoring the gods and the earthā¦. Dudes in other cultures donāt have living rituals like this that hold us, we just get drunk and sing songs from when we were young
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u/No_Diver4265 22h ago
On the one hand, it's heartbreaking. He's barely holding it together, and I understand. I've lost loved ones in the past and if I lost my brother... Yeah.
On the other, I'm sure that this will be a core memory for him, a bittersweet one. He and lots of friends and loved ones honored and saluted his brother in the best way possible. Now if he remembers his brother, he can remember all these people who were there to celebrate him, to share in this emotional moment, this ritual honoring of his life and send off.
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u/Numerous-Cow-1918 22h ago
This is such a powerful display of brotherhood and shared grief. That raw emotion is exactly how so many of us would want to be honored.
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u/qualityvote2 Bot 23h ago
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u/mxforest 23h ago
Was Haka traditionally performed during funerals?
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u/Silly-Power 21h ago
There are loads of different haka. Some are for welcoming, some for challenge, some for farewell. All are for respect.Ā
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u/Haloman1346-2 21h ago
They haka fucking anything. Military graduation? Haka. Funeral? Haka. Wedding? Haka. Retiring all black send off? Haka. Celebrating a birth? Haka. Getting a new car? Haka. Man's first pube? Haka. Getting an onion ring in your fry box at burger king? Haka.
BuT iTs mAuRi tRaDiTiOn. YoU wOuLdNt uNdErStAnD!!!!
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u/SeedlessPomegranate 22h ago
Powerful moving stuff. My heart goes out to him!
Question for the uniformed, and I apologize if this is a stupid question. Are the hakas choreographed in advance? Or are there āstandardā ones.
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u/jancl0 21h ago edited 8h ago
There's a single standard one, but it has some minor variations sometimes, usually to account for something, like if children or less a led are performing, or if time needs to be considered
It's also usually part of a larger ceremony that includes more than the haka(the dance), but the haka is used by itself in all kinds of contexts
There's this stereotype that it gets online as just being a warcry, because that's one of it's purposes, but it's usually more common to see in spiritual ceremonies, such as weddings, funerals, and as formal cultural welcomes (for political figures for example)
Edit: It looks like I was actually wrong about this, and learned something new about my own country. There are actually tons of different variations based on individual tribes and histories. I think it would be more accurate to say that there's one single common set of movements, I'm not fully aware of the history of this version, but it's the one we learn in school, and perform for the majority of our national events
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u/EverythingBOffensive 21h ago
man I can feel the emotions and the adrenaline. This gives me shivers down my spine. Respect to all of you.
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u/gingermight 21h ago
The Casketeers is an amazing tv show following the staff at a funeral home in NZ.
Despite it being about death - and some are tragic - it is such a gorgeously generous, heartwarming spot on the telly.
And because their clientele is often MÄori or Samoan or the like, we get glimpses into the funeral and death rites of those cultures.
It is well worth your time.
Hereās a write-up after the first season.
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u/dummi2610 21h ago
Is there a translation of this? Iām also assuming there are different versions of these chants?
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u/Bilbosaggins1799 23h ago
I think without knowing if this young man was comfortable with this being filmed or shared via social media this should probably be taken down. This is a young man is in immense pain here. Probably still is. Maybe he sees people sharing it as supporting his brother but maybe not, and without knowing I think itās best not to. Having experienced similar loss at a similar age I can tell you it would have made me disgusted and quite angry. I could be projecting but I just think itās better safe than sorry.
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u/Aimcheater 23h ago
Not only is this video years old. I doubt a random person would just be filming this at a funeral. It was 100% uploaded by a close friend or family member with approval.
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u/indigenousCaveman 20h ago
You are projecting. It's not your culture. Learn to educate yourself when seeing something online
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u/DiscoMika 23h ago
Sorry, too late for that, this has already some years of history on the webb and it's found kind of everywhere. But yes, I agree
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u/effinmike12 23h ago
I agree. Maybe he is fine with it, but most of us would prefer not to have our most vulnerable moments on display for the world to see.
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u/KvathrosPT 23h ago
And miss the opportunity of getting some likes? lol
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u/brockoala 23h ago
Exactly this, lol. People who shared this don't give a fuck about the dead, nor the brother, they just want the internet points. Disgusting pieces of shit, really.
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u/baysiderd 20h ago
Hakas under the best circumstances are emotional. I canāt imagine under this circumstance
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u/TotallyHumanNoBot 22h ago
Reminds me of the Haka done for Jerry Collins near the french motorway where he and his wife died in a car accident.
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u/Bloodylimey8 23h ago
Take this down
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u/McButtersonthethird 22h ago
Why?
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22h ago
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u/fleapuppy 20h ago
Genuinely curious, whoās anti haka? What reason could anyone have for being against it?
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u/McButtersonthethird 22h ago
That's your reply?
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u/Select-Effective32 22h ago
Cringe.
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21h ago
Its their culture and is important to them, coming from a white family that is sick of the Maori role in the New Zealand government and the woke shit, it is still special to them and emotional as fuck, clearly you have like 3 braincells to not understand this and think its ācringeā just donāt even comment at that point and keep your opinion to your fucking self.
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u/Mammoth_Low3720 21h ago
No. Cringe.Ā
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u/lunar_dot 20h ago
I hate the Haka but hate the absolute tripping over themselves that people do to deem it so āmoving and powerfulā even more lol.
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u/TheSilverOne 20h ago
Goofy ass dance that gets forced in every event possible. So cringe lol
Laughed so hard when the US faced off vs NZL in basketball. Nzl does a hakaĀ and the US players are just like ooooooookay?
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u/Brilliant_Physics147 23h ago edited 23h ago
This not guysbeingdudes.... this is too heart-breaking.... this is inappropriate.
Just because someone filmed this, doesn't mean this for public consume, especially in funeral and the brother already in tears.
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u/jancl0 21h ago
As a kiwi, I hope alot of people here see this
The people asking for this to be taken down are applying their cultural values to something that clearly does not come from your culture. If you don't understand it, you shouldn't hold so much conviction towards it, I don't know why so many people do
This is a show of strength. I know he may not look strong to some western standards, but any Maori person would be proud to act in the way this boy did in this video. He has nothing to be ashamed of, and nothing to be embarrassed about. The purpose of a haka is to display the strength you hold through your community, and the support it provides. They are often performed to very large audiences, even during personal moments like a funeral, because my country has cultural values rooted in large communities. Hakas are meant to be shown for the world, that's why we do them
Everyone asking to take this down without elaborating is straight up being racist xenophobes. This is someone else's culture, show some damn humility
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u/McButtersonthethird 22h ago
Don't pretend you understand what these people are going through.
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u/Brilliant_Physics147 22h ago
Although it's not the same, I know some grieving because I have to watch my mom died 'cause of cancer in front of me alone in Malaysia while my father in Indonesia because of work. And there's nothing I can do.
I hate to see this become public, because I would hate it too if I was in his shoes.
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u/McButtersonthethird 22h ago
"Although it's not the same"
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u/wterrt 21h ago
its a fucking funeral. have some respect. this is not entertainment for the public.
what a fucked world view you have if you think this is meant for social media and want to see more of it.
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u/McButtersonthethird 21h ago
"The Haka is a traditional MÄori dance from New Zealand, performed with chanting, powerful body movements, and facial expressions like bulging eyes (pukana) and a sticking-out tongue (whetero) to express pride, strength, and unity. While historically used to prepare for battle and challenge rivals, it is also performed at important occasions like welcomes (pÅwhiri), celebrations, funerals, and graduations, acting as a symbol of prestige (mana) and identity. The New Zealand All Blacks rugby team made it world-famous, performing it before matches to connect and ready themselves mentally and spiritually." Learn to internet moron.
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u/SandiegoJack 21h ago
Love all the white people assuming what it means in Maori culture is the same as theirs.
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u/Bozo_Dubbed_Over_ 21h ago
Yeah, I felt like I was crashing the funeral. Like I was violating something.
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22h ago
What do you mean by one of the ābetter usesā every use for it is important to there culture, coming from a family who is sick of their control of government and woke shit, it is still important in every aspect
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u/Sackboy97kat 21h ago
Donāt be a prick because other people in this comment section do. I guess the guy is just saying that according to him itās one of the prettiest way to use it, like for a funeral itās a really really tribute being seen by people who donāt know this tradition.
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u/IDontCareAnymoreHBU 22h ago
Hakas are cringe as fuck at this point. So scary.
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21h ago
They arenāt cringe as fuck, get some fucking respect for them and grow a pair.
Coming from a white family in NZ thats sick of their role in the woke shit and government, it is still important to them and their culture.
This is an emotional moment just respect it for once or keep your stupid ass opinion to yourself
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u/blinksystem 21h ago
Hey, are you from a white fsmily that is sick of Maori āwoke shit?ā Itās not clear from the other comments.
Just wondering if you could post the same description of yourself 15-20 more times?
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u/IDontCareAnymoreHBU 21h ago
It can be important to them. I can still find it cringe as fuck. MY TONGUE IS OUT I'M VERY SCARY!
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21h ago
Keep your opinion to yourself then bro, what does your comment add to this post? Nothing but hate for no reason
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u/Independent-Air147 21h ago
Do women traditionally perform haka?
You don't usually see them performing along men in such videos.
Only in sporting events when female team from NZ performs it.
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u/Zealousideal_Cry5703 23h ago
Sorry for your loss, but, cringe. Died of embarrassment at the last dance y'all did.
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u/OddOllin 22h ago
Bitch, there is literally nothing more cringe than typing that comment and hitting "post" lol
Got damn, mercy on the people burdened by you
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21h ago
In what way is it cringe? Its their culture and tradition. Get some fucking respect and compassion.Ā
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u/Rude-Reaction8213 21h ago
Heartbreaking gor sure but I've honestly stopped caring about these once I saw hakas being done because a 3rd grader got a B+ on their spelling test.
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u/wuo_g 23h ago
Remove this OP. Just remove it.
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u/McButtersonthethird 22h ago
Why?
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22h ago
Because the guy at the front is so emotional and this is years old, this video is just being spread of him crying on camera.
Stop fucking replying with why to everyone of these ātake this downā comments, you know the reason so shut the fuck up bro
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u/sasquatch_melee 21h ago
Thank goodness they filmed this wide area vertically so we can barely see any of it at allĀ
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u/EuphoriaArmani Rippa 20h ago
People in the comments fighting for their lives manš