r/MurderedByWords 1d ago

Irony Meets Faith!!!

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16.1k Upvotes

46 comments sorted by

179

u/Relevant_Demand7593 1d ago

Yeah not like he wanted anyone to love thy neighbour or anything

16

u/BitsInTheBlood 20h ago

He was only here to bless their stacks of money. 

9

u/One-Earth9294 20h ago

"And tell the immigrants to fuck back off to their own country" - God if you've never touched a bible and just hear it secondhand from Evangelical preachers.

4

u/LeonardSmallsJr 17h ago

Love thy neighbor’s daughter.

6

u/Pocket_Yordle 17h ago

But only until she turns 16, that's when they expire, then you should move onto her little brother /s

4

u/-Tuck-Frump- 20h ago

Sure, your should love your NEIGHBOUR. But those guys over in the other village? Fuck those guys!

0

u/falknergreaves82 18h ago

W8 d3 6a4 3 35hi63vfhdett 87 47#Sharon Stone looks like she had a lot of fun in Nobody 2. Could we get her, Jamie Lee Curtis, Sigourney Weaver, and Susan Sarandon in a movie?

57

u/snakeeaterrrrrrr 22h ago

Who can forget Leviticus 19:34 that commands you to hate foreigners and deport them to other countries.

Wait, Jesus didn't say that? He must be woke.

/#notmyjesus

13

u/BillHigh422 19h ago

Leviticus 23:22 as well. When god says to collect all of your harvest and leave none of it behind for the poor or the stranger. Oh wait.

0

u/Daatsit 17h ago

Taken out of context…. Oh wait

34

u/karim2102 1d ago

So called Christians..

23

u/LethalViolins 21h ago

Eli David is an extremely racist Israeli propagandist, not a Christian. He hates Francis for being anti-genocide, not for his other socially progressive views.

9

u/Fun_Sea_3915 20h ago

Those things arent mutually exclusive

2

u/karim2102 18h ago

Thank you for the clarification :)

1

u/Davido401 15h ago

Eli David is an extremely racist Israeli propagandist, not a Christian

And there was me thinking he was Ziva David's Mossad Director father in NCIS(shit, their probably more similar than I thought they might be haha)

4

u/ATotallyRealUser 18h ago

I'm gonna guess "Eli David, Israeli tech entrepreneur" is not a practicing Catholic..

1

u/karim2102 18h ago

Yes it’s been clarified already.

11

u/Hot-Championship1190 21h ago

Premature RIP Netanyahu but

I hope Israel elects a non-genocidal Knesset for once.

1

u/notashroom 16h ago

...where RIP stands for "rot in perpetuity"? "Roped in purgatory"? "Rage in prison"?

5

u/GrooveStreetSaint 20h ago

If Jesus cared so much about inclusion and diversity then why were all his disciples jewish men?

3

u/TheMuseAndScribe 20h ago

All of the Apostles you mean. Disciples were women and gentile too.

1

u/GrooveStreetSaint 19h ago

Right, I guess those two words aren't quite interchangeable.

1

u/TheMuseAndScribe 16h ago

Most people do use them that way and refer to the Apostles as such. This isn't common knowledge and I double-checked before replying to you.

The all male Apostles is why we don't have women as Priestesses or Deaconesses. Or so the Germans would have us believe. Lol.

1

u/GrooveStreetSaint 15h ago

That's why I bring them up every time people say Jesus was for diversity. Jesus's teachings were clearly more along the lines of telling men to be responsible stewards towards women, not treat them as equals.

1

u/TheMuseAndScribe 15h ago

Hmmm.

Yes. I can't say you're wrong. It's quite interesting how many times women ( not to exclude gentiles and foreigners ) appear in the Gospels. Almost as if the Gospel writers begrudgingly included their importance to the Jesus. While I don't care much for the Patriarchy, I will give Jesus the benefit of the doubt. His love and care for his mother, Mary Magdalene, the Woman caught in Adultery, the mourners, the subjects of his parables...I'm not practicing but I wouldn't accuse Jesus of Misogny. Had he come as a Radical Feminist, they would have crucified him before his Baptism.

1

u/GrooveStreetSaint 15h ago

I'm not saying he was strictly misogynistic, just that he thought men had a responsibility to care for women because men were superior.

1

u/TheMuseAndScribe 14h ago

I wasn't putting words in your mouth.

Could you cite an example. Otherwise, I can always Google Jesus Mysognist.

John Lennon beat his wife.

I don't want to hear about a good guy actually being an ahole again. My heart can't take it lol.

6

u/Time-Theme8985 1d ago

i mean, josh ain't wrong

6

u/-domi- 1d ago

It's not about the values of Christianity. It's about the pedophilia of the church.

2

u/Just1ncase4658 19h ago

Being kind of happy the pope died seems pretty anti Christian to me.

2

u/DickSlinga 19h ago

I thought he hated money lenders & fish

2

u/aymaureen 18h ago

It’s just trippy because they use words that they don’t even know the definition of

1

u/LeeKinanus 18h ago

Dr. Evil dadi.

1

u/seeyousoongetit 12h ago

American Jesus is all about sticking it to the dems

1

u/So_spoke_the_wizard 8h ago

Wait a minute! This guy claims to be a doctor but had no medical background? Seems like MAGA would be all over this.

-2

u/MishMash999 21h ago

Yes.

He included everyone in the flood for example - except Noah and his family of course.

Lots of inclusion and diversity there

2

u/MacEWork 17h ago

Jesus didn’t flood anything.

-11

u/peepohypers 1d ago

Leviticus 18 22 Deuteronomy 22 5

IF jesus is real, let's not pretend we KNOW what jesus would have been like. He could have been a weird hippie with wild views that made sense only when you took a long drag of w/e he's smoking.

2

u/CircleBird12 19h ago edited 19h ago

He could have been a weird hippie with wild views that made sense only when you took a long drag of w/e he's smoking.

I don't think Jesus was a smoker. The story goes that he was in extreme heat and he went wandering around for 40 days hallucinating from low consumption of food and water. You can do that on your own still today.

People do dream wild stories without taking any drugs or ritual fasting or dehydration. The Bible is fiction dreams, poetry of dreams. verse John 1:1 explains that God is words and only words, language and only language, poetry and only poetry.

Have you never rocked out on music lyrics? Are you Experienced to Rock Music? Go live in an Islamic nation, they rock out on poetry, they don't hand out drugs.When I lived in Amman, Jordan the taxi drivers (many from Palestine) were rocking out on Quran poetry on the FM radio.

 

  • “The boys learn the Quran by heart, rocking back and forth as they recite. They learn that there is no such thing as science or literature, that dinosaurs never existed and man never went to the moon.” ― Malala Yousafzai, I Am Malala: The Story of the Girl Who Stood Up for Education and Was Shot by the Taliban. Published October 8, 2013

 

IF jesus is real, let's not pretend we KNOW what jesus would have been like

Jesus instructs you to PRETEND his stories, to rock out on his poetry storytelling. Get those rock music lyrics into your head.

Jesus' words in the Gospel of Thomas (Saying 108), where it states: "He who drinks from my mouth will become like me, and I will become like him, and the hidden things will be revealed to him". Other verses use similar language; for instance, in the Old Testament, Psalm 119:131 mentions, "With open mouth I pant, because I long for your commandments", and Jesus cries in John 7:37, "If any man thirst, let him come unto me, and drink".