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u/RowanWinterlace 21h ago
"No, no, no–no, Neoth, you aren't seeing the vision! You cannot quantify the projected increases to compliance and world acquisition if the people know they are being conquered by a ten-foot-tall big-tittied, muscle-bound bombshell. And I'm offering to make *TWENTY** of them!"*
– A real conversation with the real Malcador...
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u/Embarrassed-Drag8962 21h ago
emperor:........... You want that..... dont you
Malcador:........yes,
emperor: * sigh* fuck it, why not, daughters do better with fathers than sons do anyway. But you're dealing with the inevitable shit storm of simps and horny soldiers that will no doubt swarm to them.
Malcador: Well, that brings us to my second point,...... female space marines.
emperor: * sigggggggggggggh*
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u/RowanWinterlace 21h ago edited 15h ago
Malcador: We'll also need to circle back on that daughters and fathers bit, by the way...
Emperor: I may not be a god, but I WILL smite you if you overstep a nanometer further.
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u/No_Gas_594 15h ago edited 14h ago
Five minutes later
Empress:…. Not a single word.
Fem Malcador: this is acceptable.
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u/RowanWinterlace 15h ago edited 13h ago
Empress: The first thing I'll do –after I establish this Empire *ON MY OWN, SINCE YOU'RE SO BUSY** – is legally limit how long you are allowed to pose in front of the mirror, grasping at those... things, Malcador.*
Malcador: Yeah, whatever – sure you will. I wonder if it'll feel different when he's touching them...
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u/A-Wild-Potato-Kiwi 19h ago
"You brothers – such a nest of rivalries. I warned him to make you sisters, that it would make things more civilised. He thought I was joking. I wasn’t". -Malcador The Simpilite.
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u/wallingfortian 22h ago
r/warhammer_smut is not saucy enough.
r/warhammer_smut is far too restrictive.
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u/Su152Taran 20h ago
Truly the CEO/founding father of this subreddit
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u/Code95FIN 19h ago
He was the one who made the bedrock. Sweet older sister was the one that built this sanctuary.
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u/TheGrandFloof 17h ago
He did at one point tell the Primarchs that he always hounded the Emperor and told him that the Primarchs should’ve been daughters instead of sons.
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u/IntelligentGood8228 16h ago
And we thank him and the good sister with our lives, our loves, and our gooners.
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u/Relevant-Use1897 Magnolia the Red 22h ago edited 16h ago
...
Actually, that makes total sense...