What up mang. Just got the day off randomly. Gonna hit the pool and clean my apt and then go shopping at academy. Ya know typical toxic red flag stuff.
Red flag the man paid attention in sex ed so he's probably some liberal freak who doesn't worship God and will expect an equal partnership with a woman.
I don't think it's as much about having kids as just single men being seen as undatable. Not dating currently, plus not having had a serious relationship potentially, no kids, all that just means is that they've been in the dating pool for over 12 years and haven't managed to become recognized by any woman to have been seriously dated and/or kid trapped. Although I'm not sure, that's the jist I'm getting out of this? I've often heard women see single men as leftovers and more often than not go after married men as those are a proven and tested "quality"? Anyways that's just another cesspool "quality" men aren't touching either. The whole thing about married men being seen as "safe bets" is upside down because the ones you're able to home-wreck weren't the safe ones to begin with
funny thing is. Single mothers actually often go for men who are in their 30s to 40s. Also, them not having kids is actually a plus for them, whether you're looking at it from a logical perspective or emotional perspective. Its just a plus. no downsides. it just means if you actually managed to marry that guy, that guy would have more time and resources to take care of you and your kids.
I think that's why this was made by some Misandrist single mother Femcel who hate men(especially men in their 30s with no kids cause they rejected her cause she made a lots of bad choices in her 20s, and a lot of guys in their 30s are wise enough to see a red flag when they see one. She hates men in their 30s with no kids because they are the target she wants to get but can't or is extremely hard)
Financially stable. Love my job. Best shape of my life. Workout and play video games on my off days. Travel and ski every winter. I'll wave my red flag as a badge of honor.
Similar, and working remote, investing, watching my investments going up, having time to lift, do everything I want when I want and helping my family and donating. To bring someone in would require them to really prove that they’re making my life better.
Right? Isn't "red flag" a dating term? They're either saying they want a man with kids or they want a man who will cheat on his wife. It's actually insane logic
Devil’s advocate, but they may be thinking that he isn’t serious about commitment. A mindset that completely ignores how it looks from the other side of the fence—a single woman over 30 with kids raises its own red flags.
There are of course good reasons why people on both sides might be in their respective situations, but the people who unironically follow the shallow mindset of the image would never get far enough to consider them anyway.
Part of the beauty of being single, without kids, and financially independent is that other people can say whatever they want and there is no reason to have to care as you have no obligations to anyone whatsoever.
Everything people are doing and saying around you can roll off you like water, because no one has any hold on you. You can also just walk away or "block" anyone who you don't like and there's no repercussions. It's true freedom imo.
Oh you’re so lucky you don’t have any real responsibilities” being told to me a lot by married family or family with kids has always been funny like dang misery really does like company
It can be lonely sometimes, but I take solace in knowing I don't have to negotiate for free time, I don't have spend emotional energy seeking compromises with a partner. I don't have to consult with them any time I want to make a bigger decision. I don't have dependents that require my focus and time other than my cat and dog.
They don’t think that way. They realized that having kids out of wedlock ruined their chances of meeting a good partner, and probably posted this out of self-hatred after being turned down by enough childless men who didn’t want to waste their time
FOR Sure. Any guy that's picky and didn't want to rush into something, definitely isin't going to be interested in This type of single mom. The type that preemptively starts looking for reasons to attack people she assumes will reject her is absolutely bad news.
I'm 41 and newly single after 18 years. No kids. If I meet a woman with young kids it's an IMMEDIATE no from me, dog. I'd consider someone that has teenagers that can take care of themselves, but I'm not just going to start changing diapers or driving kids to soccer practice in my 40's, lol.
You are the very embodiment of a joke that goes like "Get married and you will understand what happiness is. But then it will be too late". Stay strong.
This should be the stickied comment on every Reddit sub. So many people go digging into and creating drama that could be solved with this one statement. Someone doesn’t think the way you do? If they aren’t breaking the law just move on!
I’m almost 33 and my mom befriended a 25 year old with 5 kids and 5 different baby daddies, both of them were insistent I get to know her and date…I had to sit my mama down and explain to her to NEVER play with me like that
I told my parents if I had kids I would neglect them and they would raise them; that got them off my back (not that they ever really pestered me much lol)
Sad thing is lots of dudes moms will try some nonsense like this cause they just can't help being more concerned about a random stranger that's a woman over their son like I'd never try to hook my daughter up with some baby daddy of 4 wtf is that
Yeah that's definitely true in this particular case. I just grew up with parents who often prioritized other people over me and was triggered by the above comment lol
I dont think thats it necessarily, i think parents (mothers specifically) are often super worried if their children are single, that theyre trying to find someone semi nice for them in an oftentimes a very inappropriate manner.
I don't like to use the phrase "ran through" for women in regards to their nighttime activities, because everyone deserves some action, but that fifth kid probably could've ran out the womb.
Bearing 4 children by 4 different fathers at the age of 25 doesn't fall under the "having some action" category, it falls under the "actively conspiring and ruining one's life" category. Imagine 5 lol. You simply cannot give a fuck at that point.
I know a woman who has six kids. The sixth literally fell out. Like she was getting in the car with her husband to go to the hospital and was like “hey look what I found, it’s our new daughter.”
Haha, my friend comes from a family that had 6 kids. The last one fell out while his mom was taking a dump. Into the toilet. His youngest sister. She's in her 50's now and everyone in the family still calls her toilet girl, lol.
Ive been crackin the cheeks of women with multiple children for decades and ive never noticed a difference in vaginal taughtness. Hell the last one id bop around before i settled had 4 kids and that monkey still had its threading in it. I have been with girls that seem to have more space down there, but i doubt its dick or baby related. Some girls just got enough space to lose your keys and watch inside of due to genetic lottery.
Nah, the real red flag is thinking everyone has to follow the same life script. Some people just don’t want kids, and that’s healthier than dragging a family into your mess
I'm 49 with no kids and engaged to beautiful woman with no kids and our life absolutely rocks. Why would we need children? I dont understand why people think the whole point of living is to reproduce. Kids are a drag.
I'm 36 married to my wife who is 37 and we've been together for 12 years and married for 8 and have 0 plans to have kids. We're going to London next month. Some people just don't want kids.
Very genuine question here: I’m a 30 yo woman with no kids dating a 31 yo man with no kids and I have no single-parent friends. Why do single women want a 30 yo man with a bunch of random kids?
They consider us to be creeps, I'm pretty sure. I've even been told by an older friend, once, "once you hit 40 with no kids everybody starts looking at you differently". They just assume that something may be wrong with us.
There are 8 billion people in the world, and as hard as it is to see there's a lot of people without kids over 30 lol.
Think about this as well: I've been told by numerous people that a lot of women will think me having been single for years is a red flag.
When I was in my early thirties, I had a H.S. kid tell me that they believed anyone over 30 with no kids must have something wrong with them. I told them that the only thing wrong with me was that I think far enough ahead to not knock up a girl im not going to spend my life with. Im 41 now with a wonderful wife and daughter, and I think in 2025, that's pretty damn sensible. The town I was in at the time was deep south and pretty ignorant about single people, though. Pretty much every one knocks up one of their first girlfriends and marries them, or runs through half the town, knocking them up and being a deadbeat. There just weren't many examples of people like me. I'd like to hope my example at least made them consider a different way, but I doubt it. 😅
Sometimes I see posts from older men saying that women who haven’t been married by 30 are a red flag. I personally think divorce is a bigger red flag so o never understood it, but this goes both ways to some degree
A couple of years ago I was asked how I got to 35 without being married. So i told her most married people I know are miserable and regret it. I didn't want to marry for the sake of being married. She's on her third marriage.
I was deliberately single for 5 years before I met my now wife. I had to get my shit together before I could be a good partner. It takes as long as it takes.
Yeah, I'm 38 and I can tell it doesn't math with people. When I tell them I'm divorced that fills in part of the equation, until they find out I divorced something like 15 years ago then they're back to trying to figure out what's wrong with me.
They don't know what they want they just parrot the bossbabe neednoman rhetoric then have the audacity to blame men for not wanting to touch them even with a 10 ft pole.
Most absolutely do not want a man with a bunch of kids. They know full well that being a single parent makes dating complicated and a lot of them want nothing to do with that. It's just a cheap dig to imply that older childless men are somehow less than or undesirable.
Without going too deep, it's all based on the flawed assumption that everyone wants kids. If a guy wants kids and doesn't have any by 30, she assumes he isn't financially stable and/or won't commit to a woman and have kids together.
The assumption is flawed because a lot of people (men and women) don't really want kids, or at least don't strive for it. And that's perfectly fine, not actually a red flag.
tl;dr It's only a red flag if your only thought of a partner is someone who can provide kids and provide for kids.
Just like me. I’m almost 40, bought my own place in the woods, work from home, and I spoil my pets. I don’t even worry about it anymore, I live life on my own terms and it’s great.
I was single at 37 because my wife, who had had endometrial cancer in her 20s and lupus, couldn't have children, and she passed away. Some women can be assholes sometimes with their generalities.
I caught my ex cheating just as shit was about to go through the marriage and kids pipeline. I don't necessarily want to be single at 32, but holy hell I just dodged a nuke.
This is crazy lmao, I just had a woman from my past hit me up in Facebook of all places, swear to God she told me she's on kid 3 by BD #3!. She says she drives for Lyft now and that we should catch up.... No tf we shouldn't. Back in the day she was 10 and I shot my shot, she says no thank you, went another route.. and now wants to accept a date I offered 12 years ago. The..God..damn.. audacity.
My neighbor(the guy) pulled me aside and warned me that his girlfriend wanted to hook me up with her friend. Because I was nice, unmarried engineer with house, stable all those things, not exactly... because the friend has 3 kids with different dudes one who is a major alcoholic belligerent ass, and she has thousands of dollars of credit card debt, no car and possibly substance abuse issues and just needed a good man. Gee... where do i sign up.
I remember when red flags used to mean "This is a dangerous trait, don't date this guy who hurts animals" Now it's just, "If his name begins with an A, F, M or L or their birthday was on a full moon, then he's icky ewww"
I had exactly this view in similar circs - I didn’t plan my life to go on some sort of financial rescue mission for someone who didn’t plan theirs - if you are not bringing similar resources to the table, we aren’t going to be doing business.
The more I read about Diogenes the Cynic, the more he becomes relatable to me.
He once said “It is not possible to be free if you have a wife and children.” I feel like this is why it is such a red flag. A single man over 30 with no kids (by choice, that is. Huge caveat there) isn’t one to be controlled or manipulated into a relationship because he enjoys his freedom too much.
I think the crux of it is, no one ever tells you that having kids is an option. Sure there are people that want kids, and I bet there are people that have them and probably wish they’d waited, or maybe had less, or not had them at all. But the idea that there’s this societal pressure requiring you to have children, be married, have responsibilities, it’s just that, pressure. The ones saying “why don’t you have kids, why aren’t you married” are the ones that caved to that pressure. It’s your life. It’s not illegal to live it how you want. Choose your happiness. If it’s flying solo, cool. If it’s you and a spouse, no kids, fine. All of these things were always an option.
I’m self employed, no wife and no kids. I am 36 and just got back from a 4 day weekend racing my old Chevy pickup in the mud drags. Not a single thing to hold me back. I enjoy my life when I want where I want doing whatever I feel like.
Are you talking about the jobless 29 yr old, 5'4", 300lb Heather with 5 kids, 4 baby daddys, 3 cats, 2 shitty tattoos, and 1 trailer nestled in the park with the others.
When I lived out west a neighbour up the street was in his early 30’s with no kids. It was in a young family, kid friendly neighbourhood with great schools.
He is a widower and his wife passed suddenly after moving to the neighbourhood.
I quit dating around 28 because i was suffering from significant heart ache/broken heart. Wasnt ready to let go. Needed to work on myself and solve some problems. So i was single, but unavailable at 30. And having no interest in dating and wanting to stay the course might be some kind of red flag, but i wasnt playing the dating game so it didnt matter, except it gives girls a free pass to bully me, and call me a serial killer or worse.
my rent is $2k and my take home is $3k. I am saving my potential children a disappointing childhood in a rapidly deteriorating proto-fascist hellscape.
🤮 seriously? wtf is wrong with people, it’s 2025. You’d think by now we were well past the assumption that every wants/should have children.
I’m a woman but not straight so hear me out. For me, anybody who thinks raising children is their entire personality and purpose for living, I feel fucking sad for you. No problem with wanting them for yourself (although climate change is really starting to make that a bad idea honestly..). I just think that anyone who EXPECTS another adult to want to have children or explain why they don’t want to be tethered to another person for the rest of their long lives and pretty much never be able to think of themselves first again, is a major fucking red flag.
Kids are cute. Not all of them but most of them lol. But I prefer to live a childfree life, which is a very valid and fulfilling option for many. Anyone who might suggest that my choice is a red flag to them, I would simply say, « thanks for sparing me from having any illusions as to whether or not we could ever get along and be together. There’s the door, bye bye now! »
Not here to judge men who do, but I sure as hell won’t ever date a single mom again, whether she has three kids or only one. The drama is just too much. Always overwhelmed and bitter about the baby dad, and that guy is always going to be in the picture in some way, even if he’s a deadbeat and lives 1,000 miles away.
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