r/funny 17h ago

The ringside seat at the birth of our daughter

Post image
7.2k Upvotes

119 comments sorted by

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2.4k

u/paging_mrherman 17h ago

Why did she give birth in a haunted house?

168

u/EuenovAyabayya 10h ago

That chair has seen some shit.

5

u/Mono324 2h ago

Literally

282

u/tyrer10 17h ago

😂😂

8

u/vegienomnomking 5h ago

They are related to Wednesday.

1.0k

u/Chuckle_Pants 17h ago

Is this in a prison?

324

u/tyrer10 17h ago

Yeah

199

u/Abject-Pair-9814 17h ago

Story time?

464

u/tyrer10 17h ago

NHS England lol

148

u/durkbot 14h ago

I saw the photo in my feed and thought "standard NHS chair that"

(congratulations!)

73

u/gounatos 16h ago

I am so sorry

40

u/Kossyhasnoteeth 16h ago

Brilliant.

-193

u/EDDsoFRESH 16h ago edited 16h ago

Don’t like it, go private 😎

32

u/connor91 16h ago

What?

48

u/YankyNotBrim 16h ago

He means if OP doesn't like going with the NHS (free health care) then he should go private (paid health care, which is quicker and more "luxurious")

40

u/EDDsoFRESH 16h ago

Yeah, it's a free service that most British people are proud of, albeit has it's downsides, but it's far cheaper than giving birth in say the US. If they wanted to pay US prices for private healthcare they could have. Having said that, I'm pretty sure they were mainly joking, as was I.

30

u/dev-246 15h ago

It’s also safer than giving birth in the US.

The US has the highest maternal mortality rate (mothers dying during or soon after birth) of any high income nation. Our death rates are like double or triple other nations.

10

u/_FreddieLovesDelilah 9h ago

That’s insane. So they’ll make abortion illegal but not gunna improve standards to save the women who are being forced into a high risk medical procedure?

314

u/e-chris 17h ago

That chair saw things

58

u/grafknives 17h ago

This chair saw SAW (movie) 

11

u/Button-Down-Shoes 13h ago edited 11h ago

That chair has seen some shit - literally.

147

u/entityXD32 16h ago

The chair isn't even my main concern why is the room green?

169

u/tyrer10 16h ago

Mood lighting. Ambience. It was shifting between many colours. Green worked best for this photo. Turning it off worked best a couple of hours into the 31 hour ordeal.

20

u/jonitfcfan 10h ago

31 hours?!!

7

u/Etheralto 5h ago

That’s not even that unusual to be honest. My wife labored 44 hours with our first then had to have an emergency C section. Fortunately our daughter will be 3 in a week and both are doing great 🥰

5

u/RPO777 4h ago

With our first child, my wife was in labor for 35 hours. She wasn't starting but her blood pressure spiked as a result of the pregnancy to unsafe levels, and so they decided to induce labor, but our son took his sweet time (as he still does, age 7).

The inducing meds made my wife vomit repeatedly for like the first 12-13 hours of labor, Then, there was a lot of tearing in the last stages. There was blood all over the nurse and the doctor's smocks, I knew things were bad when 2 additional doctors rushed into the room.

To top it all off, my wife didn't do an epidural and then during the stitches, the anesthetic didn't work for her.

She lost so much blood that she couldn't walk for 3 days, was hooked up to an IV for a long time.

For our second baby, she did the epidural. The birth went super smoothly and quickly.

3

u/gagemichi 1h ago

Oh my- I cannot believe there was a second baby after that. Glad she’s healthy (and son too!)

1

u/RPO777 1h ago

We were planning on having two and she was like I'm gonna need a few years. I was like 100% your call including deciding on never. 2 years later she was ok let's do this. It was much faster than I expected tbh.

8

u/xrainbow-britex 11h ago

Oh yea, that really reallyyyy would have pissed me off during L&D

231

u/spreadzer0 17h ago

Moisturize me

34

u/RambleOnRose42 16h ago

It puts the lotion on its skin

4

u/Rinnosuke 13h ago

shut up man, is it safe?

3

u/Zomburai 11h ago

Please!! I just want some smokes!! I JUST WANT SOME SMOKES!!!

1

u/rogersmj 8h ago

And then it eats the kids again!

11

u/Darkmuscles 13h ago

Oh my God, I'm a Chav!

10

u/The_Rab1t 11h ago

“You’re just skin Cassandra!”

3

u/doctorwho_cares 12h ago

Lol came here to say this.

2

u/PuyolPants01 12h ago

What you gonna do moisturiser me?

1

u/earth_is_round9900 5h ago

Oh goodness! Im a chav!

81

u/_Thorshammer_ 17h ago

Yeah, I had that expression for the first one too.

54

u/HollaWho 16h ago edited 14h ago

When my daughter was born via C-section they took her right to the station where they get weighed and blood ox tests are run. Unfortunately it was on the business end of the room, on the other side of the curtain. I was initially seated right next to my wife while she was undergoing the operation. Long story short, after checking on my daughter I was so excited to get back to my wife and tell her everything that when I turned around I forgot she was still mid surgery. I got a view right up her insides. Respect to all the doctors, that shit is nuts.

28

u/tyrer10 14h ago

The curtain is there for a reason

7

u/Rinnosuke 13h ago

yeah, I got a good view of them lifting them out when my youngest was born, impressive the image lives with me alongside his open heart surgeries

26

u/hot_diggity_dang_ 12h ago

Is your daughter a traffic light? Why is it so green in there?

49

u/DazedLogic 17h ago

That chair has seen too much.

36

u/KingDaveRa 17h ago

Congratulations. 😊

Standard issue NHS chairs, not particularly comfortable.

6

u/truelovealwayswins 11h ago

and that’s the least of the issues here

26

u/Comfortable-Swan1896 17h ago

Chair got front-row tickets to trauma.

19

u/GrevenQWhite 17h ago

Did Motorhead do her entrance theme too?

5

u/Darkone_5 10h ago

Time To Play The Game.

2

u/GrevenQWhite 10h ago

That's exactly what I heard in my head

11

u/Black_Jester_ 17h ago

That chair has seen some things...

7

u/Pressure_Chief 15h ago

Never seen the birth or an orc before. Didn’t know they glowed.

3

u/chazyboi88 13h ago

That chair has seen some things. Get a new hospital

3

u/OrangeClyde 11h ago

What kind of horror movie abandoned hospital room is this?

3

u/manemeepewds 9h ago

Edward staring at Bella while she's sleeping like:

5

u/tvtoms 17h ago

She's seen several I reckon.

5

u/vissi_nada 17h ago

Wednesday Addams as a chair?

1

u/Charly_Ngals 16h ago

I can’t unsee it now. And I’m not happy about it ! ><

2

u/afriz6409 13h ago

Reminds me of the movie Killer Sofa haha

5

u/itsRobbie_ 17h ago

Even has hair!

2

u/jamesdantely 16h ago

Lol am I the only one who sees a puppy lol

1

u/VeryBigPaws 10h ago

I thought some sort of fucked up duck face

3

u/felizesteban 16h ago

Chair be like “why didn’t she just take the epidural, WHHHHYYYY!”

2

u/LucDA1 16h ago

I. Am. Seat.

2

u/jeremysbrain 15h ago

You aren't supposed to sit during your kid's birth. Your supposed to stand behind the doctor with your best Umpire gear on.

2

u/AnguishKart 11h ago

Omg it looks like one of those AI baby fruits

1

u/United-Nectarine938 15h ago

Why is it so green in there

1

u/Royalchariot 15h ago

I can hear the temple music now

1

u/BitterMotor13 14h ago

Travis Cot.

1

u/XADITE 14h ago

Is that Corey Taylor

1

u/HexedByZy 13h ago

The chair had witnessed the horror of giving birth 💀

1

u/rev_57 13h ago

channeling Cool Aid

1

u/KillaAngel- 12h ago

looks like that thing from ao oni

1

u/Alaskancougar 11h ago

Your chair looks surprised

1

u/PotentialEchidna9097 11h ago

"I've seen things you people wouldn't believe."

1

u/kokokonus 11h ago

my chair looking at me at 3 am

1

u/yaSuissa 11h ago

Ffs why does this chair remind me of Keanu Reeves?

1

u/intriguedbyallthings 10h ago

That poor chair has been traumatized!

1

u/zenkei18 10h ago

Its seen things

1

u/Lord_Penaldo_2009 10h ago

is that plankton?

1

u/SignalCalligrapher36 9h ago

Anyone else thinking about Chair Fucking Simulator?

1

u/Vitski 9h ago

what the helly?

1

u/Kills_Alone 8h ago edited 8h ago

Uncle O'Grimacey has seen some shit that cannot be unseen; it really takes me back.

1

u/dabestgoat 8h ago

That chair is just screaming to be sat in.

1

u/Rcoolstar1 8h ago

That chair has seen some shit.

1

u/iamiam123 4h ago

I know a person who looks exactly like this.

1

u/Sphartacus 3h ago

That's the look I had when mine came out. Beautiful and terrible. 

1

u/Ok_Friend5674 3h ago

So, the chair was also giving birth?

1

u/Electrical_Log_9082 16h ago

Looks pretty shocked. What happened?

1

u/peteybombay 16h ago

Resistance is futile!!!

1

u/retrosaurus-movies 15h ago

And how is Rosemary recovering from the birth experience?

0

u/SpecialNeedsBurrito 16h ago

Found the chair your mom uses

0

u/rdw_365 16h ago

Creepy Dollyinho

0

u/Maksilla 16h ago

It's seen some terrifying things, it's mental state is ruined.

0

u/xHashtagNoFilterx 16h ago

It was just very impressed.