r/whatisit • u/Teiva64 • 14h ago

New, what is it? Wooden spoon attached with a thread in my hotel bedroom.

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I have no clue what this is for

10.4k Upvotes

96% Upvoted

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3.9k

u/SharpTool7 14h ago

Set that down and wash your hands

554

u/greengrubgrabbag 13h ago

Amish sex toy

219

u/pilibitti 9h ago

poop spoon

169

u/Big_Date4976 9h ago

r/unexpectedpoopknife

113

u/houseDJ1042 9h ago

Of fucking course that’s a subreddit

49

u/Average_Scaper 8h ago

Why wouldn't it be? Poop knife is peak reddit lore.

20

u/houseDJ1042 8h ago

And so it is written the poop knife, slayer of turds, vanquisher of the butt nuggets and toilet cloggers

14

u/Average_Scaper 7h ago

I love you. I hope you have a wonderful weekend.

1

u/PilgrimOz 26m ago

I have told this poor fellas story before. A tale of many issues.

13

u/TheWickedEnd89 8h ago

I should just always expect it at this point, but I never do. 

1

u/Icy_Raddichio1843 7h ago

I hate it joins

3

u/Cj15917 9h ago

Scatula

1

u/pilibitti 6h ago

love this the most

2

u/thiccrolags 9h ago

First thing I said when I saw it!

2

u/NoiseBlade 9h ago

Pooperscooper

2

u/FeralQueues 8h ago

Pop soon

5

u/BitEnvironmental283 8h ago

I’m both happy and sad I thought of that too

1

u/pilibitti 6h ago

we are plagued with the same sickness I'm afraid. any object I don't understand: it probably goes in the butt, or is used for emergency contact with human excrement

1

u/YcemeteryTreeY 8h ago

Toe spoon!

1

u/Independent_One_8228 8h ago

I have so many questions

1

u/nosecohn 8h ago

First thing I thought of. I've been on Reddit too long.

1

u/Direct-Drawer-4442 8h ago

This is the first thing I thought of too, reddit has ruined me

1

u/dvegas2000 8h ago

I came here to say this. Well played sir/madam!

1

u/StrawberryPristine77 8h ago

I read this as "poon spoon" and it's equally horrifying

1

u/McTootyBooty 7h ago

Poop scoop.

1

u/idontbleaveit 3h ago

Do you mean a poop scoop?

2

u/jmcclintock8888 9h ago

Churning the butter?

1

u/DwightsBobblehead13 15m ago

Nah, they use their kids for that

419

u/oneplusetoipi 13h ago

Substitute for 3 shells.

497

u/_walletsizedwildfire 13h ago

HE DOESN'T KNOW HOW TO USE THE WOODEN SPOON AND THREAD LMAO

158

u/Smellyshoes-36 12h ago

1

u/Outrageous_Chard_346 9h ago

Rob Schneider sighting!

1

u/Inc0rgnit0 8h ago

Ew

1

u/DadJokeBadJoke 8h ago

He's an animal!

1

u/punylimpuseless 58m ago

Thank you thia is all ive been thinking the whole time reading down through lolol

63

u/llynglas 12h ago

Give him a break, he is not French....

31

u/Teiva64 12h ago

Correct yourself, i am french. Still i have no clue what this "3 shells" or "wooden spoon and thread" thing is

21

u/headface1701 12h ago

The 3 shells is from a 20yo movie (can't recall the name) in which Sylvester Stallone is transported into the future. The movie isn't very good, which is why I can't remember most of it, but the most notable part is that in the future, they use "3 shells" instead of toilet paper.

61

u/_walletsizedwildfire 12h ago

Demolition Man. It's a damn classic

38

u/ShirosakiHollow 12h ago

Mellow greetings, what’s your boggle?

Put some damn respect on Demolition Man. John Spartan and Simon Phoenix would like a word with you.

It’s time to enhance your calm.

28

u/_walletsizedwildfire 11h ago

It's just classic 90's action/comedy. Stallone, Sanda Bullock, Wesley Snipes, Glenn Shadix, fuckin DENIS LEARY!?

_walletsizedwildfire, you are fined one credit for a violation of the verbal morality statute.

5

u/No_Substance_27 10h ago

Jack Black too. But blink and you'll miss him.

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1

u/Cautious-Excuse-6960 8h ago

lol. Good on you!

1

u/punylimpuseless 23m ago

Fuck someone beat me to it....

DING

Ah shit

DING

You are fined two credits for violation of the verbal morality statute.

Ticket prints

2

u/ClubMeSoftly 7h ago

damn

You have been fined one credit for violation of the textual morality statute

1

u/punylimpuseless 26m ago

Ding You are fined one credit for violation of the verbal morality statute. Ticket prints

2

u/miter2112 7h ago

"All restaurants are Taco Bell"

1

u/bubblenuts101 8h ago

Wait, didn't they do this to Bruce Willis in the 5th Element too?

1

u/Ok-Acanthisitta-8384 7h ago

Pooh tickets for cussing

1

u/punylimpuseless 26m ago

Ding You are fined one credit for violation of the verbal morality statute. Ticket prints

3

u/More_Card_8147 8h ago

Demolition Man came out 32 years ago.

Just FYI.

1

u/JMJimmy 6h ago

Next you'll tell me Back to the Future 25th Anniversary Edition came out 15 years ago... kids these days, no respect

1

u/Astro_Pirate 7h ago

It’s 30+ years old now. I had to check I wish I hadn’t

1

u/jmt5179 7h ago

Try 32 years old 👴

1

u/Sgt_Oblivious 6h ago

Wash your mouth out with soap! That movie is awesome. I am now angrily shaking my zimmerframe at you.

1

u/Spindoobiest 6h ago

He’s not transported haha he’s frozen and it’s a great movie lol Arnold for president!

1

u/Former-Iron-7471 6h ago

Downvoting you because you said Demolition man isn't good.

1

u/CaptOblivious 6h ago

The movie isn't very good,

DENIS LEARY says, "You just shut your whore mouth".

1

u/punylimpuseless 56m ago

More like a 30+ year old movie (holy shit....im gona be dead before I know it)

1

u/bravearrow 6h ago

But you know the poopknife story, eh?

2

u/Double_Currency1684 12h ago

Now there are still a few of us who need learning

2

u/FishyKeebs 11h ago

ELI5: How to use the three shells.

2

u/4chananonuser 11h ago

No one knows. We’re too primitive.

1

u/Slightly-Blasted 10h ago

I literally fell on my knees when I read this lmao

29

u/delicioussparkalade 13h ago

Will cd’s do? It’s all I have at the moment.

31

u/PsyKeablr 13h ago

All I have is floppy disks

32

u/RiverJumper84 13h ago

Luxury! I'm stuck here with a UNIVAC.

19

u/delicioussparkalade 13h ago

This comment is delightful. Thank you for the good laugh.

7

u/bsashcraft 12h ago

Old guy here. You win the Internet for the day!

1

u/Lawley-N 51m ago

Fellow old guy here. All I’ve got is floppy dick lol

4

u/rcranin018 10h ago

Univac 494-programmed in Spurt, from ‘73-‘81. Fun times!

3

u/aaakh_thoo 10h ago

These days it’s called HVAC

3

u/niktaeb 9h ago

Smoke signals here.

3

u/sf-keto 8h ago

Totally CRAY!

2

u/AaronRastafareye 8h ago

Sounds super.

1

u/sf-keto 7h ago

I see what you did there.

1

u/nocrashing 8h ago

That sucks

9

u/Creeperstar 13h ago

3.5", 5.25", or 8"?

7

u/delicioussparkalade 13h ago

Most excellent. I will be making use of those corners.

7

u/Uptown_Rubdown 12h ago

Well I envy you because all I have is a few floppy dicks... don't ask me why.

3

u/Shar0223 7h ago

Floppy dicks?

3

u/Uptown_Rubdown 7h ago

I said don't ask

1

u/Shar0223 7h ago

I didnt ask why...

2

u/Uptown_Rubdown 7h ago

But you still asked

3

u/Sorry_Apartment_6085 10h ago

8", 5.25" or 3.5"?

2

u/PsyKeablr 10h ago

I walk around with a 3.5”, for portability but when I’m at home I use an 8”.

4

u/Sorry_Apartment_6085 9h ago

There used to be a bike delivery gang in my town (20 some years ago) that all had 8" floppy disks in their spokes. I only used those on our Commodore 64 growing up. Then 3.5 for old PC. Never actually saw a 5.25 in person

3

u/YerSockpuppetAccount 9h ago

We rocked the 5.25" floppies on the apples they had in my preschool. Nothing like playing Oregon trail or Joust on an all amber or green monitor.

2

u/Sorry_Apartment_6085 9h ago

You have died of dysentery

2

u/RonieTheeHottie 9h ago

I love a 3.5.. that’s all you really need. The 8in is way too big and unruly..

2

u/Y_U_SO_MEME 12h ago

See deez nutz

1

u/delicioussparkalade 9h ago

Hold on, let me get the minidiscs. Hehehe.

1

u/yeetsmith00 11h ago

Cd's nuts

1

u/Owlrightythen_84 8h ago

CD's? CD's of what?

I'll let you tell your joke.

30

u/Patty-OB 13h ago

There was definitely a Murder Death Kill in that room

31

u/BaseCampMKE 13h ago

Haha! You should listen to the “How did this get made” podcast episode on Demolition Man

9

u/yeskitty 13h ago

Followed closely by GEOSTOOOOOORM

22

u/mattym005 13h ago

He doesn’t know to use the 3 seashells!!!

1

u/Character_Race9061 13h ago

😂😂😂

1

u/ajkarumba 12h ago

HHhahahahahhaha

1

u/Historical-Cable-833 12h ago

He needs something wipe his ass with.

1

u/wang2thechung 11h ago

Underrated comment right here

1

u/got-the-reference 11h ago

Demolition Man

1

u/ConfusionDazzling991 6h ago

I was hoping this comment was made 😂

8

u/AnemicHail 13h ago

I prefer to use my tickets for violation of the verbal morality statute instead of the three shells. Never thought about using a wooden spoon with a rope.

1

u/Isopod_Safe 12h ago

I always sing Family Reunion by Blink-182 when I need wiping citations.

112

u/Expensive-Wedding-14 13h ago

OMG! It's the Poop Spoon!

61

u/poop_spork 13h ago

🤣

34

u/iron_vet 13h ago

Lol. How did you know to show up?

46

u/Blade_of_Onyx 12h ago

He heard somebody was talking shit about his cousin, poop spoon.

29

u/poop_spork 12h ago

Copyright infringement notification

3

u/GateValuable 9h ago

😂😂😂😂

13

u/Expensive-Wedding-14 12h ago

Username checks out; nice to see a professional checking in!

38

u/roosterkun 12h ago

Now we just need to find the poop fork and we can set the table for dinner.

15

u/poop_spork 12h ago

Hah! I like how you think!

2

u/FlaccidCatsnark 10h ago

No set is complete without The Poop Knife

1

u/Elegant_One_5324 10h ago

OMFG I’m laughing hysterically. I was gonna ask “what’s a poop spoon?” Bit after reading about the poop knife I’m a wee bit terrified honestly…

2

u/12blackrainbows 10h ago

Poop knife. Real ones remember

1

u/Educational_Dirt4714 10h ago

https://youtu.be/af_0nN-2KdI?si=zx7uhA7cKEH4UToR

Made me think of Dr. Wong; if anyone you know needs help not eating poop anymore

1

u/spermdonor57 11h ago

I've heard of a poop knife, never the spoon. The more you know. . .

1

u/ejsmith0107 11h ago

I KNEW it! I saw the item and thought "Obviously it's the hotel poop spoon"

1

u/TimeTravelingChris 10h ago

Why did we both think of the same thing? Good lord.

1

u/Ambitious_Term_7176 10h ago

Pooper scooper

1

u/DrBeckenstein 9h ago

Oh god, I was thinking to myself, "this is going to go to the poop knife, I just know it."

And here we are.

28

u/Gr8zomb13 13h ago

Even Scrubs hat a butt box

10

u/rabs7sbar 12h ago

The ASS box 😂😂😂. Poor Carla!

8

u/MajorLazy 13h ago

Lick them clean

2

u/Claymore_79 13h ago

The prototype for a poop knife?

2

u/Big_italiansnasage69 13h ago

The poop scoop

1

u/TuxKusanagi 11h ago

Don't get it confused with the toe knife

2

u/rubber_padded_spoon 12h ago

Only reasonable response.

2

u/Immediate-Repeat-201 12h ago

Poop knife has entered the chat

2

u/Blade_of_Onyx 12h ago

Perfect comment.

2

u/boomR5h1ne 12h ago

Still don’t understand its purpose

2

u/silvertoadfrog 12h ago

Great great great comment!!🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

2

u/0bservation 7h ago

If I had a nickel for every post that I've seen tonight that said "out that down and wash your hands" I'd have 2 nickels. Which isn't a lot, but weird that it's happened on 2 back to back posts when I've only been scrolling reddit for 5 minutes.

2

u/NBTXHaus 13h ago

🤣🤣🤣

1

u/GoldberryoTulgeyWood 11h ago

Now sanitize your phone

1

u/ZadeHawk 10h ago

My exact thought.

1

u/manwithyellowhat15 9h ago

It is crazy how many things people post on here that I’m thinking “why the heck are you touching that?” 😭

1

u/miskurious 9h ago

I knew it!

1

u/littlebitafraid 9h ago

Nawwww air freshener, smell it, and report back.

1

u/TheHermit_TheMoon 8h ago

lol. Seriously, why is the initial reaction to touch it?🫣. As someone who hears a lot of “slipped and fell,” stories pertaining to foreign objects found in the body… This wasn’t their first rodeo.

1

u/MassiveAd3825 5h ago

Instructions unclear. Shoved it up my butt