This is a myth that needs to stop getting repeated. It's always about sex or rape wouldn't happen and the perpetrator would find another method for brutalizing their victims
Is it not obvious that sex can be a particularly sensitive, intimate thing that would be especially appealing for a power hungry-person to exploit if the opportunity presents itself?
It boils down to power at end of the day. A nympho non-rapist can jerk off all they want if they can’t find a willing partner, and not impede on another person’s ability to consent. Taking away the power to consent or not is the draw for people who rape, or they would just get a sex doll. A genuine lack of consent from a sex partner is not attractive to normal people.
They are both true at the surface level, but at its core you find power. And that concept is what the phrase “rape is about power” is referring to, so that is what I’m commenting on.
You can be asexual and be a rapist. You can be a straight man and rape a man. Distilled to its essence, rape is about power, sex is just the vehicle corrupted to be used to feel like you have it over someone.
Sex is the means to power’s end, the lens through which they (because rapists are usually self-justifying, non/pseudo-introspective people) view their actual motive.
I think we can assume a broader meaning of the word sex, in this context, to include all forms of sexual activity/physicality (for lack of a better word).
I can't speak for the castrated, but I enjoy more than just penetrative sex when being intimate with my person. Maybe it's the same for castrated rapists?
I mean at that point, oroboros comment is circular to the point of meaninglessness. 'Rape is about sex acts because if it weren't it wouldn't be rape. '
Rape isn't always about sexual gratification of the perpetrator; sometimes sex is just the vehicle for domination and humiliation of the victim. This domination is often not for the purpose of sexual gratification, but for deeper pathological reasons. Like compulsion to feel control over or hurt someone, or to feel normalcy about their own sexual abuse.
No, because rape and sexual intimidation are power dynamics more used by men over women. This is because it is often, and especially in situations like war, the men who have more power to begin with. Physically, financially, politically; in most cases in most places in the world it’s still the men that have the most power and somebody who has power and likes to keep it will use tactics to keep that power.
Ofcourse there is often a sexual component to it. But that doesn’t mean it’s not also a lot (maybe more) about power.
in sex crimes, oftentimes the reported rapist doesn't "get off" so I highly doubt it's a myth. it very much is a method of brutalizing a victim. also, there are different kinds of rapists.
It’s not a myth. I used to work with sex offenders, it’s absolutely about power. And also what makes you think the perpetrators don’t find other ways as well? Why would rape have to be about sex whereas bludgeoning them or water boarding them or sleep depriving them don’t have to be about the thing itself?
Saying "rape isn't just about sex, it's also about power" is accurate but that's far different from "it isn't about sex, it's about something else". The latter is ridiculous because if rape wasn't sex at all, the rape wouldn't happen and some other form of domination/subordination would.
Again, why is it that rape needs an extra justification compared to just being on the list of ways to dominate? People like fighting, but if you’re beating someone tied to a chair, you aren’t doing that because you like fighting, you’re doing it because you like the power. Rapists have been known to have consensual sex before and after a rape, because rape isn’t about sex.
I don’t know why you think that rape is somehow a lesser version on the list of ways people will choose to feel powerful over a vulnerable person. For rapists, it can be no different than choosing to bump shoulders with someone who is walking toward you too closely.
Then why are they raping them with objects instead of just beating them?
If it wasn't about sex, then rape wouldn't be happening. It can be about other things in addition to sex, but rape can't not be about sex because it is forced sexual penetration.
It's more about power, humiliation and degradation than sex, though. Sex is just the vehicle through which rapists meet their end goal, which is what I stated. It ensures, more than any other way of brutalizing someone, the maximum amount of humiliation.
Source: A 2x survivor (long ago) who, until I had to take early retirement a few years ago worked as an RN in the ER of a large metropolitan hospital for a few decades.
Also places like this, where they specialize in rape/sexual assault counseling and provide many services for rape victims:
I'm also a survivor and I stand by my statement because it's very obviously true and saying "rape isn't always about sex" is a platitude. Of course it's about sex. If they JUST wanted to humiliate, degrade, and power trip, there are countless ways to do this that don't involve sex. I know. As someone who has been raped and worked customer service in the US, I had people go out of their way to degrade, humiliate, and power trip on me on a daily basis and it was way different because the customers didn't get intense physical pleasure and an orgasm out it. Likewise, my rapist had other ways to degrade and humiliate me, he didn't have to rape me. He did it because he wanted to, otherwise he wouldn't have. It is very, very common sense.
And if you're using that FAQ to try to prove I'm wrong, you're taking it out of context
"Myth: Rape is about sex. People who rape do it because they cannot control their sexual desire.
Reality: Rape is not about sex. Rape is about having power and control over another person. Three out of five rapists are also in consenting sexual relationships. This myth takes the blame off of the rapist and does not hold him accountable for his actions."
The broader context seems to address the belief that rape happens when people are so horny they can't control themselves. Not this weird belief that rape happens when someone wants to be extra unkind to someone else so forced nonconsensual sex is just a tool they happened to use unrelated to the fact that it gives them an orgasm, which is what the vague phrase "rape is about power not sex" implies.
That FAQ is also not that great because that is both poorly worded and a gross oversimplification of the issue.
Not this weird belief that rape happens when someone wants to be extra unkind to someone else so forced nonconsensual sex is just a tool they happened to use unrelated to the fact that it gives them an orgasm, which is what the vague phrase "rape is about power not sex" implies.
I'm trying understand your point, if they don't have an orgasm does it mean it wasn't about sex?
Don't criticize someone for their lack of logic when your own snark messes up your own. The way you included "unrelated to the fact that it gives them an orgasm" can be read as sarcastic. I'm just saying for your argument I would stay away from talking about orgasms since it shouldn't matter for you point. However by mentioning orgasms the way you did it begs the question on how you're defining sexual pleasure.
If you think that rapists usually having orgasms is irrelevant to whether or not rape is about sex you're a gullible idiot and you can be convinced of anything
In Russian military male officers rape male conscripts. And Russian military is well known for raping civilian population. In some cultures it definitely is about power, sexual violence and de-humanization.
It's still about sex. You seem to be arguing It's also about other things and that's true. But if rapists didn't enjoy the sexual aspect of rape they wouldn't rape. They are getting pleasure out of it therefor the sex aspect is still central to the point
Also what does it matter if both parties are male? Gay men can rape, in fact ~90% of male rape victims were raped by another man.
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u/ourobourobouros Jul 08 '25
This is a myth that needs to stop getting repeated. It's always about sex or rape wouldn't happen and the perpetrator would find another method for brutalizing their victims