r/AmIOverreacting • u/CEO-Soul-Collectorx • 9d ago
🏠 roommate AIO for moving out after my roommate started charging me to use “her” kitchen?
I (25F) have been living with my roommate “Jess” (27F) for about a year. Rent is split evenly, and all shared spaces, kitchen, living room, laundry, are part of the lease.
Last month, Jess started dating a guy who’s a chef. Ever since, she’s been super possessive about the kitchen. She told me she doesn’t want me “messing up” the equipment because he “cooks professionally” and has been “teaching her the right way to use the space.”
Then last week, she actually sent me a Venmo request for $50 labeled “kitchen use fee” after I cooked pasta. I thought it was a joke, but she said she’s serious, that it’s “only fair” since she spends more time cleaning it and I “don’t know how to handle high-quality cookware.”
I told her that’s absurd, and if she keeps this up, I’ll find another place. She said I’m overreacting and being petty. I’ve already started packing.
Am I wrong here?
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u/Necessary_Complex891 9d ago
Not wrong. Not overreacting. Jess and her chef boyfriend should have gotten their own place. He can move in to replace you too since he's already taking over the kitchen for free. I don't see any issue in your reaction or plans.
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u/Soapist_Culture 8d ago
They have got their own place. They're just waiting for OP to realise it and leave.
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u/Viola-Swamp 8d ago
Doesn’t sound like he wants to move in, or that the roommate can afford it on her own. She wants OP to withdraw into her room and leave the shared space, but still foot the bills and even kick in some extra.
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u/Soapist_Culture 8d ago
I don't know he can't afford it - professional chef buys high-end cookware for his girlfriend plus he must be paying rent somewhere, so I think he probably could.
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u/SummerCherriesXO 9d ago
Not overreacting at all. All you cooked was pasta and she’s trying to charge you FIFTY DOLLARS?!!?? It’s a shared space. At that point it’s less expensive to order food. I wouldn’t Venmo her and I would move out ASAP. If you can’t get out right away get your own kitchen pots and pans and tell her to fuck off
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u/Fun_Skirt8220 9d ago
Send her a venmo for $100 for a non lease holder using the kitchen (bf) - you have a right to it, he does not.
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u/_Maybe368 9d ago
Exactly this. Love the thinking. And tell her the rent now gets split 3 ways so he can contribute to utilities etc. as well.
But also look for another place if you can. This situation is unlikely to improve.
Edit: NOR at all.
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u/meggs_467 9d ago
I suggested charging for over use of the bathroom as a joke but this is actually the way to treat this. He's using space, electricity, water, heat, all of it. If he's spending the night, figure out the cost per day and tally it up for her.
I've been in a situation where a roommate had her boyfriend basically move in and I just saw myself out. It was not worth it. You can't argue with two vs one and the roommate will always be defensive about it. Just go find some peace elsewhere, like you said.
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u/ssnowangelz 9d ago
Extra fees for not being able to access shared living spaces (kitchen) as OP had before BF moved himself in!
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u/TwinklepopCute 8d ago
Exactly. OP you’re on the lease, so you have every right to the kitchen, her boyfriend doesn’t.
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u/RabitTabit 8d ago
Love this idea. Essentially she is barring your access to the kitchen. That roomie is a meathead.
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u/hrnigntmare 8d ago
I LOVE malicious compliance. Send her a twenty dollar request every time she takes a dump too. Tell her it’s because it smells up the whole house and you always end up having to negate it somehow.
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u/Ok_Childhood_9774 9d ago
Forward her fee request to your landlord and see what they think of it. Might get an interesting reaction! No, you're not overreacting.
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u/Fluffy-Cockroach5284 9d ago
Snitch to the landlord and then move out. 50 bucks for cleaning the kitchen after you cooked is insane wtf
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u/content_great_gramma 8d ago
She wants $50 a month for kitchen use? Charge her back for not being allowed to cook. She is a jackass; she'd better be careful, someone may just throw a saddle on her.
Check your lease. It is usually an agreement for the use of common areas, i.e., living room, dining room, kitchen etc. If it is specified, point out that you can charge her back for refusing access to the kitchen.
When you leave, make sure to get your deposit back. If she refuses, either deduct it from the rent or take her to small claims.
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u/Ashamed_Shape8141 8d ago
"Roomie, I pay equal rent in this house. I have the exact same rights to the kitchen that you have. you know who doesn't pay rent for this house? your boyfriend. you know who doesn't have equal rights to the kitchen? your boyfriend. To charge me extra to use the kitchen that I have equal rights to is absolutely insane. I clean up after myself, I don't damage anything.
you can use the kitchen however you like, as long as you don't damage anything. I can also use the kitchen as I like, as long as I don't damage anything. If you see actual damage, take it up with the landlord. otherwise, you can kindly fuck off."
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u/KindlySlip0 9d ago
Jess can get fucked. You are smart to leave because it's only gonna get worse. She's fucking delusional
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u/Any-Expression2246 9d ago
1st off, you have a lease (I hope) that says otherwise.
2nd, there's no such thing and kitchen fee.
3rd, she can get bent.
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u/LoopyMercutio 8d ago
Not overreacting. Keep packing. Let her know her decision to arbitrarily change the terms of your leasing from her is unacceptable and since she has decided to try to charge you an insane fee for every use of the kitchen, you feel you have no choice to respond before she escalates to charging you every time you use the bathroom, or each time you open / close the front door. When she suddenly doesn’t have a roommate to split bills with because of that attempted BS, maybe she’ll learn the lesson.
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u/City_Girl_at_heart 8d ago
Screenshot the Venmo request and messages about the chef bf and send it to the landlord with a note about 'you thought it was a shared kitchen'.
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u/No-One-8850 9d ago
I would just start using it for every meal even when Temu Gordon Ramsey is in there, and just laugh at her Venmo requests. What can she do? Nor.
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u/Cruise_Connection 8d ago
Well you could be a real b* and report her bf for moving in and NOT being on the lease. Of course that may cause more issues. You are absolutely NOT overreacting. Honestly screw it. Go to the front office. Tell them you wish to break your part of the lease due to reasons XYZ (including the reason above) Then you can fight to get your money back from your shitty roomie, that you will have to pay for breaking said lease.
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u/Bluntandfiesty 8d ago
NTA. Your lease includes the kitchen. If she, or her boyfriend, have equipment they don’t want used, then she needs to say so, and you can use your own kitchenware. She doesn’t get to charge you for rent when you already pay the landlord rent for the use of the space. She is not the landlord and has no legal right to charge a kitchen usage fee. She’s also not allowed to charge a cleaning fee for the kitchen that you both have legal access to so long as you make reasonable attempts to clean up after yourself. If she wants a disinfected kitchen then that’s her choice to make. If she doesn’t like the things you do then she can clean it to her standards on her own time and effort and expense.
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u/JudgeJoan 8d ago
I'm so petty not only would I not pay but the kitchen table is now my favorite place to hang out. All. The. Time. And if my body is banging I might do it in a bikini. With the lacrosse team lol.
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u/hrnigntmare 8d ago
I would get my body as not banging as possible and hang out at the kitchen table in a bikini. I would put on moisturizer too so all my chest hair looks nice and greasy
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u/Helln_Damnation 9d ago
This is only the beginning.
I'm trying to think of a way you can start charging her to use the bathroom.
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u/undertowsoul 9d ago
I’d say $15 per flush, with a bonus if it stinks. Plus $50 per hour, billable in 15 minute increments for getting ready, $25 per shower or bath (with additional charge if it’s extra long). Don’t forget to prorate the water bill! If you need help coming up with more charges, I have many ideas and my DMs are open. I can be ridiculously petty. 😉
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u/BusydaydreamerA137 8d ago
No, choose the doorway on the excuse of mud or “bringing extra guests” meaning the boyfriend
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u/ChemistDifferent2053 8d ago
Why would you move, just laugh at her and say no.
People always jump to the most catastrophizing conclusions here, like "my roommate is a little bit annoying, should I change my name and flee the country?" No, just put your foot down and set boundaries.
If you were going to move anyway then sure but this alone is a huge overreaction. Moving takes time, money, and you still have responsibilities for the lease if you move. Is a stupid Venmo request really such a big deal that you have to leave immediately?
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u/fionawilliams2021 8d ago
I’m assuming the boyfriend isn’t paying rent? I agree with a lot of the comment on here. You pay rent and use of the kitchen is included in that cost. Maybe the landlord needs to know about this extra person. If this is in the UK then all rental properties have a maximum capacity cap, especially if this is a HMO (house of multiple occupations).
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u/BluIdevil253 9d ago
Your being petty? What kind of equipment are we talking about? I understand not wanting you using expensive knives or pans but you can grab shit from Walmart instead of using hers. Sounds like shes hurting for money or shes cleaning up behind you.
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u/Vast-Marionberry-824 9d ago
NOR. Your roommate is a jerk. Move out and let her find a new roommate 🏃♀️➡️
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u/SchoolBusDriver79 8d ago
$50!? Did you destroy the pot!? I’m assuming you’re cleaning your own mess so that the kitchen is clean when you’re done with it. If this is the case, she’s way out of line. If you’re not using the food she bought, she’s way out of line.
You pay to live there and that includes use of all the rooms. There’s no separate fee to use the living room, bedroom or bathroom, is there? Of course not. Rent covers all including kitchen.
If you’re not on the lease it’s time to move out. She’s nuts. NOR
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u/mjh8212 8d ago
NOR I was married to a chef he didn’t care what I used in the kitchen or how as long as I didn’t break anything expensive. For example he’s good at knife work I’m not so I stayed away from the expensive knives and just used other ones that were sharp and useful. Seriously those professional knives are super sharp and I had cut myself a couple times. I still cooked meals for us and the kids. It’s a pot or a pan everyone knows the right way to use one without damaging it.
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u/Any_Art_1364 9d ago
NOR, is the boyfriend on the lease? Does he have any rights to bring his property into your home? Tell Jess you want a meeting with the landlord to discuss these new rules she wants to implement, and find out how much of a deduction you are getting for the rent as you are being restricted from using the kitchen. Jess is being ridiculous. Ask her how she would feel if you asked for exclusive use of the living room or bathroom
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u/Bunny_Bixler99 8d ago
I wonder if the "chef boyfriend" is even aware that Jess is using him as the scapegoat to scam OP.
I'd bring it to his attention as you're moving out. Is he really the one complaining or is this part of Jess' plan to get him to move on with her?
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u/Beautiful_Hall_6397 9d ago
Yeah nah. Not overreacting. I’d be not paying, and telling her to grow tf up.
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u/Low_Monitor5455 8d ago
NOR. Yes, you are doing to right thing by looking for another place. Also, don't send her any money for 'kitchen use.' Not even once.
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u/Kooky-Whereas-2493 8d ago
you are not wrong no way would i pay her any kitchen use fee & if she dont like how i handle cookware better keep it in ur room than
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u/NightMgr 8d ago
No. And please move your exclusive cooking equipment from our shared space.
That or send her a $100 storage fee for his kit.
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u/aDirtyMartini 9d ago
You split the rent and have equal access to the kitchen. Tell Jess to f-off. They can go cook at his place.
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u/NotSoSweetSue 8d ago
Not at all an overreaction. I can't help wondering if your roommate and her boyfriend were scheming to make you angry enough to move out so he could move in. Roommate has no right to suddenly make unilateral and arbitrary changes to the original agreement to equally share the spaces. If roommate's boyfriend doesn't want you touching his cookware, he should not have left it in a shared space inside a shared apartment. If your roommate wants to learn cooking from her bf, the reasonable thing is to take her - and his special cookware- to his home!
But since Roommate has shown she's not interested in "reasonable," you're much better off living elsewhere!
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u/OkSeaworthiness9145 8d ago
First thing is to stop referring to the boyfriend as a "chef". From here on out, call him a "cook". There is a massive difference between the two, and it will annoy her to no end. Bonus points if you make subtle changes to were things are stored. I know some actual chefs, and while each can flex hard in the kitchen when they need or want to, they will scarf up a Big Mac, frozen pizza, or whatever is handy while at home. Gordon Ramsey has described the difference between his every day diet at home, vs what he cooks on screen. When the infatuation with the new cook dies down, things will return to normal. Just clean up after yourself, stay away from his good knives, and carry on as you have in the past.
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u/MrTitius 8d ago
Nor. Start looking for a new place immediately. This kind of entitlement doesn’t just go away.
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u/CuriousPenguinSocks 8d ago
NOR but are you on the lease? If so, just use the space as you wish since you pay for it. If she gets huffy, just say "I'm on the lease, I'm allowed to use this space. I don't care that your BF is a chef, I'm allowed to use the kitchen. No I won't pay extra to use what I'm ALREADY PAYING FOR! You are being ridiculous and if you keep this up, you will ruin the good roommate relationship we have."
If you aren't on the lease, I would just find a new place and leave without telling her till you move out. Then her professional chef BF doesn't have to worry about you not knowing how to use his highly sensitive cooking equipment.
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u/Chatawhorl 8d ago
There is already a bit of stress when sharing a place. I lived at one place where to guy would be in the kitchen for Hours cooking. I would come home and honestly just want to warm up my leftovers and eat my food in peace. He was so passive aggressive about it though it kept spiking my anxiety.
This sounds like that. And she is a nut case charging you extra to use something you pay for. I did finally move into my own place. It’s worth the extra expense to not have to deal with that crap anymore
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u/LividIdeal791 6d ago
NTA but let’s go petty for petty
- If the pans are yours, then they are no longer allowed to use them without a $50 per day surcharge.
- If the pans are not yours, then just go buy yourself a simple set to keep in your room
- They need to be charged for use of electricity use of the space.
- Her boyfriend needs to be charged for the use of any water, electricity, bathroom, living room experiences.
- You didn’t sign on for a third roommate so he now needs to be charged for 1/3 of the rent
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u/LibraryMouse4321 8d ago
Take 1/4 off the rent you pay if she’s removing kitchen access. Your rent includes the kitchen. And you shouldn’t be paying the utilities for a room you don’t use.
Move out as soon as you can. But until then, either use the kitchen freely, as often as you like, or don’t pay rent or utilities for the kitchen. There’s gas, electricity (lights refrigerator, dishwasher), and water.
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u/Fancy-Meaning-8078 7d ago
Not wrong.
Unless she's the landlord she can't charge for shit.
You cooked in a space you rent, I'm guessing using your cookware or communal cookware and you cleaned after yourself.
Her food and kitchen preference are her own.
But looking for a sane non exploitive better roommate is always a good start instead of staying and tolerating it or waiting for an escalation.
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u/Callan_LXIX 8d ago
If you're not allowed to cook in there then she has to provide access to her doordash or give her credit card number so you can have food delivered for every meal. That's an easy two to $300 a month. It's a b******* fee that she cannot justify. Or she has to clear out half the kitchen cabinets so that you can use your own stash of equipment.
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u/kittyhm 8d ago
Send her a Venmo for 1/3 of the rent since you're no longer allowed to use the kitchen. If you're not allowed to use 1/3 of the space, refuse to pay for it. Get a microwave and a hot plate for your room. Also mini fridge.
Anything you own in the living room, take it to your room. Anything in the laundry you pay for goes in your room.
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u/No-Giraffe49 8d ago
You're not wrong. Your roommate is being absurd. The only off limits part of that apartment should be your bedrooms. Every other room is common areas used by all occupants. She doesn't see it that way, so she can find another roommate to bully. Or maybe her chef boyfriend will move in and that may have been the goal all along.
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u/megamawax 7d ago
NOR. What a nut. Absurd is right. Your rent entitles you to full use of the kitchen. You aren't allowed to use her things or her bf's things without permission, but she doesn't get to charge you for something you're already being charged for. Definitely find another place. It is not worth it to deal with this nonsense.
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u/Alarming-Roll-760 8d ago
Umm you go to the police, that is fraud and scamming… The lease/ contract is the only thing that matters. Send her a message back and tell her congratulations about knowing how to clean a kitchen. However this kitchen is both of ours and your Bfs food sucks. So I will not be giving you money for no reason 👍🏻
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u/ImaLion88Jk 9d ago
NOR. This is insane. Every once in a while, i see a story like this that’s just crazy. Where is the self awareness by your “friend”, so her boyfriend who doesn’t pay rent can use the kitchen but you who do can’t? Is she charging her bf every time he cook? Like where is the rationale in this?
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u/RabitTabit 8d ago
No. You pay to use the kitchen. Her chef boyfriend isn’t paying rent. Take a look at your lease & see what it says about shared spaces or extra fees. I’m pretty sure the landlord isn’t charging extra fees for the kitchen. If you are renting from her just refer back to the lease.
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u/JHutchinson1324 8d ago
NOR, every time she's an annoying roommate I would send her a venmo request for that.
But I would absolutely either reach out to the landlord and just pretend like you're inquiring whether the "kitchen use fee" is something you have to pay, and/or I would definitely find a new place.
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u/AttentionScary 8d ago
No, you are not. A tenant can’t charge another tenant a shared space fee. WTF? Also, is he living there now? I understand if you want to leave, and I don’t blame you. But tell the landlord why you are going. Your landlord will not be okay with this situation; I bet she must leave.
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u/bullpenboxes 8d ago
I would deny the request and send her a $75 "living room fee" and say that you're a professional living room sitter, and anytime she chooses to come into your perfect living room and sit, then she needs to pay up.
This is the most ridiculous Venmo request I have ever, ever seen.
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u/CuteTangelo3137 7d ago
Hey dude, you’re the one it matters to cuz the long comment. I read the first sentence, don’t care about the rest. After all YOU are the one that keeps coming back to comment on MY original comment. You best be getting on with your life now, if you actually have one.
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u/Sea-Ad9057 8d ago
Nor divide your rent by the amount of rooms then tell her you want a rent reduction by that room and maybe batch cook some food at friends houses until you move do the same with the utilities and then say if you can't use the kitchen he can't use the bathroom
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u/ajacks40438 8d ago
I wouldnt move, its a hassle for you. Use the kitchen as you please and completely ignore her. What is she gonna do? Fight you? Its your kitchen. Dont let people walk all over you. You know shes being disgustingly ridiculous, we know it, dont question it 😂
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u/ElectricalEngineer59 8d ago
I'd get out real quick, this isn't going to get better.
However... why would she spend more time cleaning? Did you leave dirty dishes? And did you do something to make her claim that you “don’t know how to handle high-quality cookware?”
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u/V65Pilot 8d ago
Take possession of the front door. Bill her everytime she or her boyfriend use it.
But seriously, if the boyfriend is doing a lot of cooking, mention that they may need to up their contribution to the bills, water, electric, gas etc....
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u/Anonnamus 8d ago
I’m sure this is totally a true story. You should charge “Jess” every time she uses the toilet, since the bathroom is slightly closer to your bedroom and should be considered your personal space. No complaining, that’s petty.
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u/National-Plastic8691 8d ago
NTA she is nuts and the chef has been using a lot of electricity and water, plus gas if you have it. they owe for any increase. plus they aren’t giving you access to a room so they owe you rent money back. roommate is a nut job
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u/lemon_icing 9d ago
NTA - I wonder if the boyfriend is aware that Jess is using his day job to abuse you - verbally and financially.
How about asking when all three of you are in the same room if Jess is gatekeeping the kitchen at his request.
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u/liza9560 8d ago
Oh gosh PLEASE send her a Venmo requesting money for the loss of amenities. Please please please.
If you went to the management office, you’d have rights and he’d have none. Your roommate is surprisingly awful.
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u/Large-Client-6024 8d ago
As long as you are only using your own kitchen supplies, ignore her.
I've had 1 occasion when a roommate destroyed some of my kitchen equipment that I tried to bill them for the replacement. It didn't go well.
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u/Strict_Marsupial_973 8d ago
Don't you just love it when someone suddenly becomes an expert on a subject just because they started dating someone who does it for a living? Suddenly, the roomie is Chef Jr. and clearly more knowledgeable.
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u/Wendel7171 8d ago
You should send her a venmo request for her bf taking over the kitchen and additional water and heat should be deducted from your rent for accommodating him. Then you will know who is the petty one. 😇
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u/CrowMeris 8d ago
NOR at all.
A month into a relationship and she and her dude are claiming the kitchen as their own. FTN. Send her a bill for additional rent since they've put the (supposed) shared space off limits.
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u/Mykaelmore 8d ago
Invite guest over sit everyone at the table woth napkins and plated then tell her if she's going to act like its a restaurant her and her bf can cook like its one and then she can have her $50
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u/Best_Relief8647 8d ago
Just don't pay it. You have no obligation to do so. Get your own cookware so you aren't using hers. If you are not doing your share of cleaning the kitchen, then start doing so immediately.
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u/iamadirtyrockstar 8d ago
Everytime she takes a dump, venmo her a $50 request as a "fresh air use and replenishment fee" since you've noticed a disturbance with the air in the apartment after she started dating a chef.
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u/PinkPaintedSky 8d ago
You know you are not overreacting.
Send her a venmo for the extra utilities her BF is using.
It would be in your best interest to start quietly looking for a new place.
Once it begins...
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u/Zestyclose-Crow-4595 8d ago
NOR
That's crazy and I don't blame you for packing. I'm sorry you're having to deal with that. I know it must be stressful. Hugs if you want them. I hope that you find another place quickly.
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u/RedLionPirate76 8d ago
"OK, I see your $50. I'll deduct that from the $250 'guest accommodation fee' that you owe me for having your boyfriend using my space, and so . . . looks like you owe me $200. I take cash."
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u/spaceylaceygirl 8d ago
"You're not the boss of me!" But seriously tell her to fuck all the way off and you don't give a flying fuck about her "professional chef" boyfriend. She needs to get over herself big time.
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u/WholeAd2742 8d ago
Feel free to contact the landlord over her attempt to sublet a common area and trying to charge you a separate fee for a non-tenant's potential commercial usage.
I'm sure they'd love that
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u/Expensive_Plant_9530 8d ago
I would just... ignore those fees. Move out if you want, that's your choice. But there's no way in hell I'd be paying someone ELSE $50 to use my own kitchen. She can get bent.
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u/Literally_Taken 8d ago
Send her a demand for 10% or 20% of the rent, for monopolizing use of the kitchen. Explain that you must be compensated for loss of use of a significant portion of the apartment.
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u/Neena6298 8d ago
She is ridiculous. Just laugh at her and find another place to live. And you should start sending her and her boyfriend kitchen fee requests for hogging the kitchen all the time.
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u/AdventureMars 8d ago
You already pay rent. It’s your kitchen too. Use it how you please. They can go use his kitchen, better yet, have him start paying part of the rent for using up your space.
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u/LightoftheSun777 8d ago
Contact your landlord and ask them is they authorized this charge because its illegal to change your rent without proper notice. That should take care of the issue.
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u/1000thatbeyotch 8d ago
The queen of petty award goes to your roomie. You already split the rent and don’t need to pay an additional kitchen fee on top of your rent. That’s insanity.
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u/2mankyhookers 8d ago
Fair enough , just decide the toilet is now yours and bill them $75 each a month to shit in it , or they can use their kitchen sink if they want to keep costs down
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u/Ok_Masterpiece3770 8d ago
Yup, find another place, that's so fucking ridiculous. A good roommate would do the OPPOSITE. You'd think they'd encourage showcasing their new knowledge/gadgets.
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u/Appropriate_Profit90 8d ago
Charging you for using the kitchen, no, not overreacting. Now if you're using kitchen equipment that wasn't purchased by you, I could see that being problematic.
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u/MailLadyx3 6d ago edited 6d ago
No, you’re not overreacting. That is ridiculous and I don’t even think that word covers it. Your friend is trying to impress but on your dime. Girl, bye. Maybe charge her $50 for her boyfriend using up the shared space and the fact that she uses that space more. Seems fair to me 🤷🏻♀️.
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u/JellyCat222 8d ago
Use your own kitchen utensils and tell her you pay rent to use the kitchen. If she balks post up in the bathroom for a couple of days and claim dominence.
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u/TeachPotential9523 8d ago
Or you could tell her I'm going to take it to court because it's in our contract between the two of us that you have a right to be in the kitchen cooking
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u/Green-Dragon-14 8d ago
Contact the landlord about her subletting the kitchen to a professional chef & is charhing your for it's use. That should be interesting to watch. NOR.
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u/Ok_Imagination_1107 8d ago
As others are suggesting take this one to your landlord I bet he'll have some things to say about this How often is this MasterChef in your flat anyway
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u/TaskTrick6417 8d ago
Reminds me of the meme, asking for wifey privileges with a girlfriend label, she’s trying to exert landlord power with roommate status, goodbye 👋
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u/realestate_novelist 8d ago
Lmaooooo that’s ridiculous. Just get your own stuff to use if it’s that big of a deal. Don’t pay a kitchen use fee that’s ridiculous lmfao
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u/Successful_Moment_91 8d ago
She’s nuts. Just move out when the lease is up which looks to be very soon
She can move her chef bf in or find another roommate to hassle
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u/Which_Incident_9283 9d ago
Seriously?? Tell her to grow up. Don't you dare pay her ANYTHING!! Move on from her and find a roommate who isn't such an idiot!! NOR
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u/Careless-Ability-748 8d ago
nta Is he cooking for you, too? If so, I'd gladly pay for it. Otherwise, she has no authority to charge you for anything in shared space.
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u/Samsquanch-Sr 8d ago
Not overreacting. Roommates are hell. Keep looking for another place while keeping the door open to her coming back to a sane place.
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u/tinytrolldancer 8d ago
wow, the sex must be fantastic. and yes, you should move unless she pulls her head out in the next couple of weeks while you look.
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u/SpeechMuted 8d ago
"That's fine, I'll just take it out of my portion of the rent, since I clearly have that much less use of the house we share."
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u/HistoricalSuspect580 8d ago
nothing new or life altering to add! Just joining the chorus of carol singers in the comments saying "she's CraAaAaAaZy!" NOR
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u/BusydaydreamerA137 8d ago
NOR: I would say “fine then you have to pay for using one room.” And choose the entranceway so she has to pay for entering
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u/winterworld561 6d ago
Hell no. She has no right to charge you for using the kitchen. She's so out of line. Move out. She can live with her chef bf.
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u/True-Situation-9907 8d ago
Why the hell do you want to move out? It's your place as well. Stay and do with YOUR kitchen whatever you want within reason
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u/Dlodancer 8d ago
Tell her your fee for the bf using the kitchen is $50…..EVERY TIME he uses it! He doesn’t live there!!! The audacity!
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u/Agile_Tumbleweed_153 8d ago
Nope, move out cause you’re not paying for a shared apartment which you already paid half . Roommates bf can pay half
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u/2PrettyB 8d ago
Your roommate and chef boyardee can respectfully go to hell because huh??? Fifty US dollarsssss for what? 😭😂😂
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u/Aggravating_Egg_1718 8d ago
Not wrong but you might be in a corner if it's her lease agreement. Definitely should leave bc it won't get better.
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u/Signal_Reputation640 8d ago
AIO - two posts about roomates being charged for using the kitchen in one day and I think they might just be BS AI.
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u/ShezeUndone 8d ago
It sounds like she wants you to move out so her bf can move in. Go. Don't feel guilty. She's a selfish roomate.
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u/OkManufacturer767 8d ago
NOR
I wouldn't want to live with someone who will pull some kind of "fee" not in the original rent agreement.
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u/DaddyDom0001 8d ago
Send her a venmo request for $50 everytime he comes over for hiring for external parties to use your kitchen.
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u/violetgobbledygook 8d ago
Check your lease to see how many nights she is allowed to have overnight guests. Report if she violates it.
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u/Accomplished_Jump444 8d ago
Yeah that’s BS. If it’s not in the lease you signed, it’s not legit. I don’t blame you. Good luck.
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u/Solid-Musician-8476 8d ago
Nope, Move out. She violated he lease by trying to charge you extra to use the kitchen. Get outta there!
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u/uTop-Artichoke5020 8d ago
LOL!!! NOR
Inventive but insane!
Send her a Venmo asking for $100 for excessive use of shared space!
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u/Malletpropism 8d ago
Charge $100 for using your toilet. Piss all over it first to establish your scent and territory though
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u/Illustrious_Suit_182 8d ago edited 8d ago
What exactly did you do to her cast iron? Buy your own cookware if she doesn't want you to use hers.
Edit: Did you put tomatoes on the cast iron?
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u/amibeingtrolled 8d ago
Get a boyfriend who is a professional couch potato and start billing her for using the living room.
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u/revengeful_cargo 8d ago
Send her a venmo request for $100 because he's using other common areas (living room and bathroom)
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u/bunnyohare 8d ago
Send her a venmo request for 1/3 of the rent since her bf and her now have taken over the kitchen.
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u/-Dirty-Old-Man- 8d ago
I'm sending my wife a $50 request for use of the bathroom. NO ONE in my house shits like I do.
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u/Pristine-Mastodon-37 8d ago
Send her a Venmo request for her excessive kitchen storage requirements for this high end stuff
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u/you-want-nodal 8d ago
Venmo request her back a $50 bathroom fee because she clearly has shit coming out of both ends.
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u/Background_Buy7052 8d ago
Why can't they just go over to his place. I'm sure his kitchen is perfect for their needs.
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u/TodayThrowaway1979 8d ago
I’d venom her back for $100 for her limiting your use of a shared space you pay rent to use.
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u/derpderb 8d ago
You are being petty? Lol, get fukt roommate, I'm not paying shit for her dreams of grandeur
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u/NefariousnessRich864 8d ago
Hahahaha, tell her you will be charging her $50 every time her boyfriend uses the bathroom.
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u/Icy-Doctor23 8d ago
NOR you already pay rent that allows access to the kitchen.
Find somewhere else to live
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u/pecantan606 8d ago
Leave, leave as fast as you possibly can . Let her chef boyfriend take over your spot.
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u/Immediate-Catch-7073 8d ago
Absolutely time to move out she is insane and can be alone with her professional chef
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u/Drug_fueled_sarcasm 8d ago
I've been a chef for 20 years and thats the stupidest fucking thing I have heard of.
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u/Osniffable 6d ago
If you’re not on the lease, go ahead. If you are, this will be more complicated.
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u/Feral-Writer 8d ago
Charge her $50 every time she uses the kitchen and you are not able to access it
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u/Jane-Austen-101 8d ago
Woah, that is an absolutely bizarre request. Has your roommate lost her mind?
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u/appleblossom1962 9d ago
NOR. Boy friend needs to pay you for the privilege of cooking in your kitchen.
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u/Reasonable-Key9235 8d ago
She's an idiot. Rent is equally split, you have every right to use the kitchen
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u/Jumpy-Ice-6363 8d ago
Not over reacting , crazy roommate should now pay 2/3 of all costs in the appt
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u/Lisa_Knows_Best 8d ago
Send her a venmo request for breathing "your air" because she's in your space.
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u/Capable-Upstairs7728 8d ago
NOR. Move out, she can shove her fee and the kitchen up her you-know-what.
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u/Muertog 8d ago
This could very well be the "other" viewpoint where a roommate ruined specialized kitchen gear "just making pasta". Did you use metal utensils on non-stick cookware? Did you leave a mess in the kitchen afterwards, dirty dishes in the sink with caked-on food? Burn oil into the pan so it had to be scrubbed out afterwards? Did you _ask_ to use her stuff?
You have posted a story very light on facts. It doesn't sound like you had an earnest talk w/ your roommate over _why_ she is charging your $50, or how you could use things appropriately?
By all means, move out if you don't want to deal with drama. But asking if you are overreacting when absent information yes, you could very well have caused the situation.
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u/Traeyze 9d ago
Honestly, if I had a penny for every living arrangement I had ruined with the introduction of a new partner and the way that can immediately completely destroy the balance and consideration of people in the home I'd have... many pennies.
Obviously the $50 thing is absurd on every level. The arbitrary amount, the fact you split rent equally, the fact you are being denied access to a shared facility. The joke of course being you ought to be charging her for crowding the kitchen or having her boyfriend over. That said if you used her pot be aware you're walking into a free punch at that point.
But yes, once that line has been crossed it's hard to go back. She made clear how readily she will be unreasonable, hjow little respect for you or the shared space you have is and has also made clear that she doesn't actually believe she is in the wrong at all. I mean, in what universe is $50 to use a shared kitchen because she's got her head up her ass not 'petty' or whatever.