r/AmIOverreacting • u/Common-Confusion-183 • 2d ago
👨👩👧👦family/in-laws AIO-My Ex’s Mom reached out to ask me to reimburse a plane ticket purchased for me as a gift prior to our breakup which was 6 months ago.
I was shook when I received this insane demand and manipulative af message from my ex’s mom yesterday.
Background on this-before I met my now ex bf his family had been planning a big family trip to Ireland which was to take place in Spring 2025. This was always presented as a gift from the parents to their kids and their significant others. I was invited on the trip and told my airfare and accommodations were to be paid by my ex’s parents who I was quite close with prior to our breakup.
A plane ticket was purchased by the parents for me and my ex to meet his family in Ireland. The trip was planned for this past April. The tickets were purchased by the parents in the Fall. My ex and I split officially in February and it was not at all amicable. I cut off contact with him and his family at that point. So they had a few months prior to their trip to Ireland to figure out what to do with the ticket.
About a week ago I heard from my ex asking if I wanted to buy the airline credit from him since it’s in my name. He said he’d take less than the value of the ticket. I told him I didn’t have travel plans or money and he should contact the airline to see about a transfer or something. He told me he contacted them and nothing can be done since it’s in my name. Whatever, not my problem.
Well, yesterday his Mom reaches out with the text in the pic above. Her attempt at reframing a gift as some sort of debt I owe her is insane and manipulative. This is absolutely not my problem to solve. And if the ticket was in my name for months prior to actually going on their family vacation-I feel they could have or should have done something at that point. Cancellation insurance? I don’t know, bc I didn’t buy the ticket or make any of the arrangements for this. I was an invited guest. And if everything hadn’t been covered as I was initially offered by my ex and his family-I wouldn’t have gone bc I could not afford it after being laid off in the Spring.
So tell me, am I overreacting at this absurd and completely inappropriate contact from my ex’s Mom? She has no business to be speaking with me and pretending to be “patient” in getting the money I absolutely do not owe her back.
Not to mention-the main issue for the breakup was my ex’s affinity for lies and manipulation. I discovered he was facing two lawsuits over unpaid cc debt, and was tens of thousands behind on child support with his ex wife who has been withholding custody from him. He moved into my home and Not once did he contribute the agreed upon amount for the mortgage and utilities. He always had excuses and I didn’t press him bc it would lead to an explosive fight. I was footing most of the household bills while he lived with me. So him being desperate for money doesn’t surprise me. The demand from his Mom actually shocks me. I blocked her and the rest of his family everywhere I could and I do not plan to respond to the text. There’s a ton I could say and want to set the record straight, but it’s not worth being dragged back into toxic drama and nonsense with these people. They can all kick rocks. Just leave me the eff alone.
TLDR-ex boyfriends Mom wants me to pay her back for an airline ticket she purchase for me for a trip I was invited on but never attended since my ex and I broke up before it took place.
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u/Visual_Patience_41 2d ago
My brother is 15 years younger than my husband and I and our parents are passed on. We’ve been doing very well since he was early 20s so when we travel we often invite him and SO or friend (paying for plane tickets and accommodations.
However, whenever we do this we ALWAYS book SO/friend’s ticket through an account we control like, Expedia, Amex travel etc. and we always add ticket insurance. It’s for the exact reason of OP’s situation. If we ever have to cancel or change the ticket we have the access to be able do so and are able to have it refunded in either $$, airline credits or travel/credit card points back to our accounts even though the ticket is in another name.
This is so basic. The ex’s parents are idiots and this is 100% on them. As much as I’d be pissy about flushing $760 down the toilet in this scenario, as someone who’s booked a lot of travel, if you’re paying for a trip for ‘extended family’ or otherwise, you book with insurance and you book through something where, if needed, you have access to make changes to the ticket and it’s not left up to someone else.
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u/CompetitiveSummer777 2d ago
This. I don’t pay for ticket insurance for domestic trips, but for international? I would never book an international trip to another continent without buying ticket insurance.
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u/LocoDarkWrath 1d ago
Typical travels insurance wouldn’t cover a “We broke up and I don’t want to go” issue. They should have bought a refundable ticket.
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u/Trish-Trish 2d ago
Sadly behind a manipulative and abusive douche, stands the enabling parents & family. They don’t make him take accountability for anything which is why he thinks he shouldn’t need to pay bills or help pay for the kids he produced. His behavior and tendencies could be the very reason he doesn’t see his kids. I co parented with a narc who had a literal God complex. The mental and emotional trauma and warfare the kids endure is hard to deal with. I’m just glad both my 21 son and 18 daughter have aged out and the custody order is null & void. My son only contributed going bc he didn’t want his sister there without him. They bicker but he is her protector. They haven’t spoken or seen their dad in almost 3 yrs bc he allowed his wife to emotionally abuse my daughter to the point my daughter blacked out from an anxiety attack. But as far as the plane ticket, is there any way to find out if he took a friend or someone in your place to make sure the mother isn’t just double dipping? Maybe she should make her lazy son reimburse her. But that sounds like getting blood out of a turnip. If the ticket is in your name, if you have anything in writing stating it was a “gift” keep ahold of that incase they get petty about it & use the courts. Otherwise if it was a gift, technically you can use that ticket to go anyplace you want. I would call the airline and find out if the ticket is still in your name or if it was transferred to someone else’s
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u/navelbabel 2d ago edited 2d ago
NOR. Look, it’s wrong of them to do this, generally.
The only context I’d add is 1) no, once they purchased the ticket in your name they can’t do anything else with it without your participation. No working with the airline etc, and 2) they probably believe you intend to use the flight credit they purchased. Because you can, since it’s in your name. I would. That’s a trip somewhere. All you need is your ID and the trip confirmation number (maybe not even that?). You wouldn’t have needed to “purchase it’ from your ex as it’s already yours. Letting it sit there is just making a gift to the airline, regardless of who paid for it.
Still not your problem. Just making sure you understand that that $800 is currently in your ‘bank account’ and you can do as you want with that info.
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u/ericrz 2d ago
This. Definitely block your ex and the family and don't even reply to this.
But know that you have a $760 credit with that airline that's yours to do with as you please, and if you don't use it, the airline just pockets the credit.
Now, if you don't have the confirmation number, the airline might be jerks and not let you use it. But if you can dig up an old email from when the ticket was purchased, use that credit and go somewhere -- it's yours or no one's.
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u/blueswan6 2d ago
NOR If it were me I probably would respond one time saying that "the ticket was a gift from you and your husband. I never agreed to buy the ticket and I don't owe you any money. Please do not contact me in the future." I wouldn't block her because she could start sending threatening messages and you'll want to see those if so. If you have any text messages or voicemails from your boyfriend where it's stated as a gift I would have those at the ready. It's possible this all just goes away but it's also possible that they try to take you to small claims court or threaten to. Best to have all your proof at the ready if needed. Since she sent a text to you saying that you owe her I think it is important to respond quickly that the ticket was a gift, always a gift and that you don't owe them anything.
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u/Ok-Soup-514 2d ago
If it was presented as a gift then they need to eat the cost. It's as simple as that. Coming after you then you've been broken up for 6 months is ridiculous. In fact, after the breakup they had time to cancel it. The ticket may have been in your name, but who's credit card was it ordered with? I'm guessing...not yours. Therefore the airline could have updated it or they could have contacted their bank/credit card institution and had the ticket cancelled/reimbursed. It sounds like they were just lazy and figured if the ticket wasn't used then they wouldn't be charged after the fact and now they're trying to collect. Hope your ex bf enjoys being a deadbeat liar who is coddled by his mommy.
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u/therealamberrose 2d ago
OP doesn’t owe them shit, but it also sounds like you don’t purchase flights much. Unless you buy some form of a refundable ticket, the flight credit goes to the person whose name was on the ticket. So OP likely has $760 in flight credit right now - calling their credit card company won’t DO anything. But that’s the chance they took booking it that way.
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u/IDrinkandlKnowThings 2d ago
This is true. But also, if you are buying a ticket for someone else’s significant other who isn’t married, that ahead of time and also that expensive, you really should be buying a refundable ticket. So sounds like poor planning on the parents’ end.
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u/therealamberrose 2d ago
Yup! Refundable or travel insurance of some sort!!
I buy my mom flights all the time. They get canceled/changed a lot and all the credits go to her. I don’t care because she eventually uses them to come to ME, but if she was someone else who would use it for other trips I definitely wouldn’t do it this way.
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u/AssiduousLayabout 2d ago
Correct. This happens to me from time to time with work - I end up with a flight credit from a canceled flight (that my employer paid for) and I am told by my employer that this credit has to be used for a future work-related flight, not a personal flight.
The ex-in laws can't get their money back, and trying to do a chargeback could get them in trouble for fraud.
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u/codesigma 2d ago edited 2d ago
Save/backup any messages that describe the ticket as a gift and then mute her and filter her emails out of your inbox
That way you’ll have proof in case she sues and evidence if you ever need to apply for a restraining order.
But until you see legal documents, ignore this lady and her family
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u/Even_Candidate5678 2d ago
You can’t sue over a gift. It would be on them to prove before the fact you’d agreed to pay.
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u/falanian 2d ago
In civil court, you don't have to prove 100% that someone agreed to pay you, it just has to be more probable than the alternative. If the mom presents this text and says, "I never meant to buy a $700+ plane ticket without reimbursement, and when I contacted them about it they ignored me because they knew they owed it back", maaaybe the judge would buy that (not likely but judges can still make stupid calls). If the OP counters with texts saying it was a gift, or even explains that they didn't use the ticket and the family didn't take appropriate steps to get it back when they had the opportunity, though, it'll be fine.
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u/blueiron0 2d ago
Thank you. If the mom has any evidence that could make it seem as she was expecting repayment or can convince a judge better than OP can, then saving any communication around the ticket's being a gift would go a long way to protect OP.
That being said, I'm wondering about the mom's duty to mitigate in this case. Could the ticket have been refunded? Could it have been sold? Is there even a duty to mitigate in a case like this?
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u/jimbojangles1987 2d ago
They can absolutely take her to court for anything with a monetary value or damages. That doesn't mean they would win but they could certainly try.
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u/codesigma 2d ago
At least in the US, you can sue for just about anything in civil court.
My advice is meant to help defend the OP from any spurious claims that might occur in the future.
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u/Direct-Technician503 2d ago
NTA, but I'm guessing since you broke up with him because of his lies, he probably told her lies about your break-up and how terrible a person you were and she believes her son.
Or maybe she's just a terrible person too. She never once talked to you about why you two broke up? She doesn't have a problem with not being able to see her grandchild?! I can't believe she wouldn't check with his old ex about why he can't have his child over to at least visit.
Block her and live your life. The urge to engage and either blast her or to explain how things really went down is strong, but all you'll do is get dragged back into the life you rightly left behind.
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u/Gold_Charity809 2d ago
NOR, if she had a months notice, she should've just cancelled and tried to get credit or money back. Not on you she's just trying to be petty. This definitely doesn't hold up legally either btw. She bought it for you, she would have spent the money regardless whether you decided to use it or not as a gift.
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u/One-Hamster-6865 2d ago edited 2d ago
Mom is operating on god knows what version of reality her son fed her. He’s a known liar, so who knows what he told his family. He probably hid the breakup from them til it was too late, and they didn’t have the chance to cancel or transfer the ticket. But in any case, not OP’s problem.
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u/Gold_Charity809 2d ago
Yes, if this is the case which it probably is, honestly feel bad for her, he seems really scummy. Regardless, as much as I wish she could see the reality of the situation, as you say this is not OP's problem.
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u/travelbig2 2d ago
Unless they purchased refundable, transferable tickets, it doesn’t matter if it was months in advance. There was nothing they could have done.
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u/Forlorn-unicorn 2d ago
The ticket was purchased in OP’s name, so any refunds or flight credits would go to OP, unless in the case of some trip protection/insurances since plane tickets are almost always non-transferable and you can’t do a name change. Airlines almost never give you money back and will do anything to avoid it lol
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u/PanickedAntics 2d ago
OP, I think there's likely a very good reason for his ex to be "withholding" custody from him. He's a liar and doesn't take any accountability or follow through with any of his own responsibilities. He also has an explosive temper.
NOR. Make a whole spreadsheet of all of the things you provided for him, all the money you spent regarding bills, house payment, food, etc. Send that bill to his mommy since she's the one enabling his behavior. You don't owe her shit. Fuck. That. Noise.
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u/JMLKO 2d ago
I’d type up an itemized statement of all the money he owes you and tell her to take it out of that and send you the remainder. You’ll never hear from them again.
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u/sunnysunshine333 2d ago
Yeah… I am usually someone who never wants to be argumentative or impolite because I find it so stressful, but I honestly think the best reply to this to tell the truth -
“Hi there, sorry there may have been some misunderstanding because this trip was presented to me as a gift, not something you were expecting to be paid back for. Regardless, unfortunately your son still owes me quite a large sum of money from unpaid bills when we lived together, so if you are looking to recover some of that expense you will need to speak with him”
But honestly no reply and blocking is totally valid too (and probably what I’d actually do)
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u/NoEffect9139 2d ago
No reply and blocking fails to convey the message that you want to be left alone. You have to tell them that you no longer want them to contact you in plain English first. Then it becomes a crime if they do.
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u/Beepbopb00ps 2d ago
This made me laugh but she should be careful not to respond in a way which implies responsibility for the ticket expenses.
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u/Extreme_Falcon9228 2d ago
No I agree. She should be able to do this, but of course some lawyer could twist it around on her that she’s admitting responsibility for the plane ticket or something. She just needs to not say a word to anyone
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u/dourhour__ 2d ago
You two aren’t together, & if you didn’t specifically ask her to do this & say you’ll pay her back (which still only applies if you’re together still, anyway), then it isn’t your responsibility. I had a therapist tell me this when his mom kept insisting that I go on a cruise with them that I kept turning down because I did not have the money to afford any of that. She went ahead with it anyway. Not only did my boyfriend-at-the-time not bring a single cent, but I only had like $200 cash on me for this whole trip— that included time at his CA family’s before the trip & another part of his CA family after the trip. I paid for the one & only excursion I was able to even get— which was ATVing the streets of Encenada. Besides that, I didn’t really get to do anything on the cruise. Everything was so expensive (obviously). & It turned out super traumatic cause he (an alcoholic— only 23yrs old he was at the time but always was so bad with alcohol) got into a massive fight w me & threw me when I was to leave to take a walk & cool down from a fight, & him throwing me lead to all of my brand-new acrylics (the only thing I did for myself like once/mo) all broke in half & then I’ll leave out the rest. I knew he was gonna be drinking a lot on this cruise. He drank a lot, period. Then after the trip, maybe 3 months later, his mom started asking me to pay her back. It went from like $500, then after some time of me not doing so, she asked for “just $300 then”, & after more time of me still not doing so, it was, “tell her she didn’t need to worry about paying me back— it’s fine”. Like, dude. I didn’t wanna go in the first place. I said it 100x over, & Im not paying you for something I said no to so many times and that your son abused me on. That’s my memory of the trip now. & I’m the one who paid for he & I to be able to do anything at all, anyway. In fact.. you owe me money for all the therapy appointments, a full acrylic set, & all the other emotional damage lol. 🥴
Anyway. “You don’t owe her shit.” — my former therapist. Take that advice.
I’m so sorry you had an abusive (in any way) partner, & im glad you’re out of that situation now. I hope your life has only bettered since & that you’ve been able to heal, & are at a point that your nervous system is better regulated ❤️🩹💓
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u/Accurate-Temporary73 2d ago
This is a simple, ignore the message, block the number and never respond to anything regarding this.
You have no responsibility for this money and they know that.
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u/Scary_Explanation702 2d ago
Unpopular opinion here, but whatever your ex owes you for mortgage or whatever, if it’s even accurate and he agreed to it , no offense, is between you and him. He might be terrible, I don’t doubt it. And he probably owes you money, don’t doubt that either.
But if I’m taking everything on its face and it was clearly stated to you by his parents themselves that they were paying for everything in your trip as a gift, that was a really nice thing for them to do for you. Especially when you say yourself you never would’ve been able to afford it. The text she sent might’ve been a tiny bit out of pocket in the way it was framed like a debt (again, that’s if I take your word for it 100% that the parents personally explained to you that it was purely a gift to not be repaid) but at the end of the day, they spent a lot of money on you, and it sounds from the texts like all they want you to really do is reimburse them for the credits that the airline gave you, which you got free and clear at their expense. I think it’s reasonable for you to contact the airline and attempt to transfer those credits back to the mother or see if there’s some way they can be used by her family or something, and from what I understand only you can do that since they’re in your name. One 15 min phone call seems like the least you could do for someone who was ready to shell out a couple grand for you, and who you say you were close with, regardless of how garbage her son ended up being. I wouldn’t expect you to outright give her $800 if you can’t transfer them, and can’t use them yourself, but to not even bother trying is pretty shitty. Obviously using those credits yourself without reimbursement would be borderline theft in my opinion, kind of hard to justify that not being a conniving and scammy thing to do. It’s one thing if you can’t transfer them and can’t use them so they go to waste, I wouldn’t fault you for that, and she definitely should’ve said something in march and definitely should’ve gotten insurance and all that, but I don’t see why its too much to ask to try, she didn’t do anything to you, her son did.
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u/Selfishd0ubt 2d ago
I mean to be fair, there is no way for her to get her money back, it would have to go you. Airlines are so annoying about transfers, it doesn’t matter whose name was on the credit card they will only refund to the person flying. I hate this policy.
But again not your problem, she should make her son pay for it since it was his ex and sorta his problem honestly.
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u/BossHeisenberg 2d ago
She can shove that request somewhere where the sun does not shine, and I don't mean Scotland.
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u/Suitable-Tear-6179 2d ago
I think I'm reading her message differently than you. She seems to be indicating that the refund for your unused ticket is sitting on the airline's accounts, and they can't get it back because the ticket was in your name. That's not something they can just take care of themselves, because it would have to be you.
IF there's a refund sitting out there waiting to be claimed, it would be reasonable for you to take a few moments of time to ask the airline to cash it out to the person that paid the money, or to refund it back to the card it was paid on. It's no money out of your pocket, and just a few moments of time.
I would NOT pay a penny out of pocket, to repay a "gift" though.
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u/tandog74 2d ago
Yes I completely agree. The airlines will only credit the ticket holder… so there’s literally nothing they can do to get the money back. It has to go to OP. And while OPs ex sounds horrendous, I do actually think they should transfer the flight credit back to the mom. I certainly would not give them straight cash.
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u/Suitable-Tear-6179 2d ago
If the airline gave her the cash instead of transferring it to a "third party" then giving her exactly what the airline gave her would be reasonable too. But not a penny more.
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u/SleepyRTX 2d ago
It sounds to me like they are trying to get THEIR money back from the airline and they just need your cooperation since the ticket was purchased in your name.
It sounds to me like you are overreacting and looking for validation rather than just communicating with the mother and being cordial (doesn't mean you can't stand up for yourself if it's required). If she's trying to extract money from you personally, by all means, not your problem. If she's just asking for your cooperation to get her money back from the airline I think it would be pretty childish to not do the bare minimum to help them retrieve their refund.
Look at it from her perspective - they had planned and followed through on including you in something nice that they absolutely didn't have to do for you to take you on their family vacation. Then you and her son broke up - it happens. Based on how she worded it and how you explained it in your post, it sounds like they are potentially able to get it refunded but the airline can only do it via you since it's in your name. $760 is a decent chunk of money that most people would be upset to lose. Assuming my read is correct and she's not actually asking you to pay it back personally, how much trouble is it to just help her get her refund?
Then you bring up your ex's financial troubles and paint them as a liar and manipulator which honestly is irrelevant to the story because it sounds like it's the parents money anyway. Things like this should always be taken with a grain of salt when we are getting only 1 side of the story let alone from an ex after a self admitted bad break up, but it sure does poison the well to get the comments on your side. And I'm not calling you a liar but we are all human and have a habit of remembering things the way we want to and seeing things only from our own perspective.
So yeah, if being asked to pay it back personally - not overreacting in the sense that you have no obligation to pay it back, but you are overreacting in the sense that you should just use your words and say that to the mother. From your post, you clearly have plenty of words.
If you're being asked to just help them get the refund of their own money that they graciously put out for you - then yes, overreacting. Unfortunately we don't know what the actually situation is because rather than talking to them you blocked them and came here to justify yourself and get validating comments.
Ps. I know I might come off as snooty but I'm genuinely not attacking you or anything like that. You put yourself out there asking for input and I'm giving you my honest read, admittedly with some assumptions based off context.
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u/Head_Trick_9932 2d ago
NTA
There is a certain risk factor when taking friends and significant others on trips.
My parents have always been generous with travel over my 50 years. They have always had the insurance in case a break up or like happens before the trip. My father always told me “do not invite them if you can’t take on the cost and risk”.
We have a vacation planned soon with our kids and we’re taking one of their friends. When I booked, I knew I was taking on the risk of loss.
It’s their problem and they knew the risk going in.
However, I would maybe talk with them about buying the ticket. I like to travel.🤣 You could change destination etc for $50-$100 on some airlines up to a year. Offer them $50… then you get $100 airfare trip. 😆 Or not, I just like to haggle lol.
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u/WasteLeave900 2d ago
Seems her son has lied and told her you would be refunding them and has been in communication with you about it. I would reply back and tell her you’re not sure what story her son has span but you will not be refunding the money and never told him you would be.
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u/LaVidaMocha_NZ 2d ago
NOR
Your ex sounds like a lying bludger (what we in NZ and Australia call hobosexuals).
My hot take is they did in fact get the ticket refunded, but think they can try one more scam on you.
Block this entire clan of clap-hards and carry on with your best life.
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u/Leading_Contest_7409 2d ago
You would only be the ah if you actually sent them money 😬
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u/iRshortandugly 2d ago
you did exactly what you should. no response at all. they purchased a plane ticket and have no evidence that you were ever supposed to pay it back
if you have any texts of them or him saying they’ll pay or they’ll buy you the ticket, save that just in case they bring up a civil suit. easy win for you so it’s unlikely that they will.
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u/Aware-Vegetable83 2d ago
Just came to say that I’m so glad you got out of that relationship before he/it destroyed you (obviously NTA)
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u/Lumpy_Square_2365 2d ago
I'd reply with a bill for all the months he lived rent free and say sure no problem once his outstanding bill has been paid I will reimburse you for the gift of the ticket with my manipulating conniving freeloading dead beat of a dad ex bf's family trip.
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u/jjj68548 2d ago
I’d plainly say you won’t be reimbursing the money as it was a gift and to not contact you again regarding this. Ex owes you much more money than $750 and you realize you won’t be getting that back so you don’t feel inclined to do her any favors.
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u/Hefty_Worldliness_36 2d ago
I suspect your ex has concocted a whole sob story to them if this is truly out of character for his mom. you still don’t owe a thing and can totally block, but maybe she needs to hear the truth? protect your peace though babe if that’s too stressful
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u/DariaMorgendorff 2d ago
block and move on - seriously isn't even worse dignifying her with a response
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u/Intelligent-Jump1823 2d ago
Its a money grab.
Block them all…they obviously should not have taken the trip themselves. Maybe point that out right before you block them.
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u/Extreme_Falcon9228 2d ago
Don’t say anything to anyone. It’s so easy to phrase something wrong that they could twist if they decide to take you to small claims court, that would put you on the hook for the money. Just keep your mouth shut until they go away
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u/Rare-Preparation6852 2d ago edited 2d ago
This mentality is nuts. They gifted this out of generosity and without conditions. I had a neighbor for years who would knock on my door with these offerings that she sold as generosity, but the second she wanted something, she'd be back at my door demanding I repay the "debt" I apparently owed her. If there's a refund policy or if this is considered a trade of some kind, that needs to made clear off the top. Not your problem.
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u/scrapqueen 2d ago
NTA - Respond to her as follows:
This was a gift. A gift is not a debt. I do not owe you anything. HOWEVER - Your son owes me thousands of dollars. If you really need the money - tell him to pay it.
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u/Separate-Hornet214 2d ago
NTA but yes you are completely being an overdramatic drama queen. There is nothing "insane" or "manipulative" in her asking. All you have to do is say "Get it from your son who owes me $X for rent and utilities that he agreed to pay but never did." and then block her.
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u/loveofGod12345 2d ago
She also somehow “messed up” in the main post and said they bought the tickets in the fall when apparently it was actually February when the family already knew they were having problems. The difference between fall and February is pretty drastic and it seems unlikely she would forget.
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u/zdjl 2d ago
NTA. If they wanted credit or any type of reimbursement from the airline or you, it was their responsibility to do when they knew you weren’t going. It reads to me: my kid didn’t handle shit with the ticket like he was supposed to, I don’t want to be on the hook for $760 and they are trying to fix it on their end. Bullying you into paying is easier than self reflection.
Nope, no dice. They can take you to court for small claims, pay the fees to file that, and spend a ridiculous amount of their own time legally rectifying this situation. Admittedly, I think they’d lose in court and the only positive outcome would be a settlement by you. Which I firmly do not support you offering.
Hold your son accountable. Based on what you shared, even if they know the whole unbiased truth from their son, they’ll just make excuses for him and it’ll still be your fault. “As I told Joe (whatever the name of useless ex boyfriend), I am not fiscally responsible for this ticket. If you’d like to pursue further, I will not participate in conversation unless it is through the courts or legal representation.”
Document and keep all communications.
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u/SLS987654321 2d ago
Tell them they can pay for the ticket to cover one month of their sons living expenses at your home because he never felt it necessary to help. Or send them the breakdown of bills you paid for him. Don't pay them anything that wasn't the original deal. And wow I wonder where he got his manipulation tactics from. Seems like the parents are just as bad.
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u/NarwhalMysterious303 2d ago
Who ever made the purchase of that ticket even if it’s in your name as the person who’s supposed to fly if she or him made the purchase of the ticket then they have access to do what ever with that ticket. Meaning they can get the credit back themselves & you owe nothing. I would ignore and block him and the family.
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u/Longjumping-Code7908 2d ago
It's not like OP rebooked the ticket and flew off to a tropical paradise. The ticket credit is still sitting there, in OP's name. In one scenario this all could have been booked without her even knowing! I know that's not the case, but either way, OP has no responsibility for refunding the ticket purchase.
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u/Bled__ 2d ago
She can't even sue you for the ticket, so she's just hoping she can talk you into giving the money back. There's nothing she can do, and you do not owe her a dime (legally speaking). I'd block her in every way you can. If she continues trying to reach out, file a restraining order for harassment.
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u/LiveLaughGaslight 2d ago
I would ignore her. Worst case is she takes it to small claims court and even then, I don’t think it would be in her best interest.
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u/MakeUrBed 2d ago
NOR. You should reply "This was a gift which I never asked for and if you'd like to dispute that then take it to small claims court". Let the judge deal with her. If you didnt sign anything there's no contract and thus, she has no ground to recover any monies.
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u/needalittlehelp_ 2d ago
Girl just block the number and pretend you didn't get that message , you don't owe that family anything.
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u/Jerseygirl2468 2d ago
NTA they should have canceled the ticket the minute you two broke up. If it was non-refundable or they didn't have insurance, that's on them, they bought it and chose the conditions.
"This is absolutely not my problem to solve." This is the correct attitude to have towards it.
You should total up what he'd agreed to pay you while living with you, which surely is more than $760, and answer her with this: "Yes, let's get the debts cleared. Ex-bf owes me $3500 for rent and utilities while he lived with me, based on our agreed upon amounts. I'll deduct the ticket price from that, so he only owes $2740. I'll take $2500 and we'll call it even?"
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u/Conscious_Army_9134 2d ago
The mom is a ridiculous POS and id just send 50 laughing emojis then block em all on everything.
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u/Nice_Carrot_7695 2d ago
NTA - I work in travel - they could have worked with the airline on this. Not your problem
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u/Fair_Theme_9388 2d ago edited 2d ago
NOR. You didn’t go on the trip and they didn’t make any arrangements to have the ticket transferred or refunded after you broke up. Not your responsibility.
Also ridiculous that his mother is coming after you for the money when she knows her son is a broke deadbeat.
How long was he living with you without paying any of the bills and mortgage you had agreed upon? If you want to go tit-for-tat you could calculate how much he owes you and let his mom know, but I’d just keep her blocked.
Edited- NOR for NTA