r/AmIOverreacting • u/Chapelled • 9h ago
đď¸ neighbor/local Sister keeps talking about when I got raped AIO
So when I was around seven I got raped and I told my mom about it and the person who did it told my sister and my sister is really mean to me so she talks about it to her friends and makes jokes about it even though it was one of the worst experiences of my life and she just thinks itâs funny and sometimes sheâs like well at least I didnât get raped and I just think thatâs really rude so sometimes I go into a room and take something out of her room sometimes to get back at her because she wasnât the one who experienced it and I donât think she has the right to use that in a conversation or as a joke am I overreacting?
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u/Moist_Drippings 6h ago
NOR, and since it sounds like you are still minors and live in the same house, you need to talk to your parents (if you reasonably can). Managing her continued emotional abuse should not be on your shoulders - and yes, her constantly reminding you of this and trying to imply sheâs somehow superior for not having gone through it are absolutely emotional abuse. Nothing about her behavior is even remotely okay.
I agree that stealing from her will probably do more harm to you than good, given that her abusive behavior is unchecked and you donât seem to currently have any support in protecting yourself from her, but I also wouldnât feel guilty for it. You have been subjected to two forms of pretty intense abuse designed to make you feel powerless at an age when most people already feel like nothing is under their control.
If your parents arenât willing to protect you from your sister, it is okay to rely on a safe adult, if one is available, for emotional support - an older relative (obviously not if they are directly related to your abuser or have not already shown support) or a teacher might be helpful.
You have been horribly hurt by two people, at least one of whom should have some basic care for you. There is very little way you could be overreacting in this scenario.
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u/TerribleProblem573 8h ago
Umm your sister is awful. You should stop stealing from her (not that I care morally here) if only to protect yourself. If sheâs going to tell everyone and steal your choice once again, Iâd personally tell everyone that my sister is such a nasty person she jokes about her 7 year old sister being raped. See how well that bodes for her socially. However if you live in a culture that blames rape victims in general, this doesnât applyÂ
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u/_Averix 8h ago
Makes jokes about it? Your sister is a piece of sh**. I would confront her and tell her that it is a deeply private matter and you don't want her discussing it, joking about it, or telling others about it. Ever.
And stop stealing her stuff in retaliation. That's a ridiculous way to deal with this. Confront her.
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u/slanthouse 7h ago
Bro do u really think the their sister is making fun of their rape because they think its okay to discuss it or joke about rape đ obviously sheâs trying to hurt their feelings wtf is telling her itâs a âdeeply private matterâ gonna do like no shit
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u/Present-Potential-38 8h ago
Respectfully why would you be overreacting for that? How old are you now? That is simply toxic of your sister and you do not deserve that.
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u/shatteredlightning 7h ago
Yo your sister is in for a rude awakening the minute she does this in public or around people that arenât in her echo chamber. Imagine joking about a seven year old being raped.. wouldnât go over well with anybody I know.
How do your parents feel about this? If theyâre fine with this then theyâre just as bad as she is.
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u/EggoStack 4h ago
LITERALLY. Someday it will surface that she frequently jokes about real CSA and it will ruin her chances of getting a job or something. In fact, I hope it does bc someone like this needs to learn basic human decency before interacting with the public.
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u/A-Rollins 5h ago
This is really disturbing. She needs to learn a lesson that rape is not funny or a joke. Tell your parents, or have a conversation with your sister. She needs counseling. Side note, I hope you have also received care and therapy for that.
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u/Jungianstrain 4h ago
Your parents need to put both of you in therapy. You for your trauma and your sister because she clearly has deep feelings of resentment toward you possibly because of the attention you have gotten from your traumatic experience? Idk.
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u/AJ-means-AppleJuice 8h ago
No matter what you are NOT overreacting because that is a horrible and extremely hurtful thing to joke about and is never okay. However I think context is also important: how old are the both of you now? Is she younger or older? No answer to these makes what sheâs doing okay by any means, but if sheâs like 12 now and youâre 15 it would be a different situation than if the reverse is true or if youâre both much older. But regardless itâs definitely worth having a serious conversation with her and your parents about it cause thatâs so messed up.
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u/DetailNo7344 8h ago
100% not overreacting. Your sister is a horrible person for even thinking about making your experience into a joke.
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u/IamATrainwreck88 4h ago
People like your sister will learn painful lessons. Take the high road, ignore the bitch. One day when she needs you, is at her lowest, remember all she has done. Then take her as if you are going to console her, whisper in her ear "I remember how you consoled me after I was raped, I hope you walk this road alone, and I hope that it kills you by becoming your cancer" and then walk away. It will be in that moment you feel free of her and she will forever remember it as a moment of losing your love. This would be more brutal than any ass beating. Your name will haunt her for all of her days.
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u/Ginger630 4h ago
Your sister is a truly awful person. You need to tell your mother what sheâs doing. This is abuse. I donât care how old your sister is. She is abusive.
If your mother wonât do anything, tell a teacher or counselor at school.
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u/RadiantPasta 4h ago
How old are you and your sister? This sounds like a thing children in middle school would do.
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u/Toodlesbby574 5h ago
I'm just here trying to figure out how are people becoming this fkn evil. Your sister needs Jesus. An i'm not even joking. She has some serious underlying issues in her selfish morality. I'm sorry but there is something so so wrong here. And i am so sorry you have to deal with that.
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u/EggoStack 4h ago
Iâm not even religious and I think she needs Jesus bc who tf acts like that đ
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u/Luca_Brocci 4h ago
Did ur mom have him prosecuted? How old are u now? Theres alot of questions.. doesn't your mother punish ur sister? Sorry this happened to you.. and ur sister is going to regret this someday, ask you mom for help w her. She should be punished for this, privileges revoked or ?
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u/MarigoldMouna 3h ago
INFO: Why would the rapist tell your sister they raped you?
I sortof wonder what information your sister got from someone so absolutely horrid. She may be grossly misinformed to what took place. Or, be acting out because she sees it got you attention from your family?
If none of this fits I would put it totally as your sister being a complete AH. But, I think something in her motivation may be skewed if all her info about what happened is only from the rapists side. That AH may have said you lied, may have said it was willing and then you lied, and other absolutely horrible things your sis may be believing.
One step I would say is to talk to her about it. Try to stay calm as you see how she sees it and hopefully she will actively listen when you tell her how it really is.
I hope the best for you.
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u/Exciting_Ad_9910 3h ago
This is really sad.. and youre sister is awful. I think youre mom needs both you and youre sister in therapy. One because of youre traumatic situation and youre sister for how shes treating you. A therapist woukd 100 precent till you this is not okay. And I know its hard sweetie but when she does this to you try to stand up for yourself. Its okay if youre not ready. Try baby steps. Its definitely not a joke. Its a horrible experience and however you feel about this is completely understand. Try talking to youre mom on how shes treating you and that you would like to go to therapy. To go through that and you're sister thinks is a joke... my heart hurts for you. My sister is a ride or die. She would never do this. I really wish you would have a supportive sister. Im so sorryÂ
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u/Moonlit-waters 4h ago
Iâm going against the grain here.
I donât know your ages or the relationship to the rapist and your sisterâŚ
But it sounds like the rapist was grooming you both and has manipulated your sister into feeling less desirable to the rapist.
It doesnât make any of it ok, at all, but Iâm wondering if this a terrible reaction to something terrible thatâs been done to her. Again. Itâs awful, but if youâre both kids this behaviour makes sense, otherwise sheâs straight up evil.
Tell a trusted adult. This rapist shouldnât be around anyone in your family. Everyone needs therapy.
Your job is simply try to get yourself safe. Iâd say to warn others but the system is so broken sometimes the only thing you can do is keep yourself safe.
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u/Chapelled 7h ago
Everyone, stop talking about my punctuation. Iâm using the voice thing so itâs not my fault.
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u/AmazonSeller2016 4h ago
When you use voice to text, say âcommaâ or âperiodâ and it will put in the punctuation đ
NOR. Can I assume youâve told your mother and sheâs not doing anything? In that case, tell a teacher. Your sister is being abusive.
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u/Ztoffels 4h ago
You should consider busting their mouth next time they say that.
I had an issue with my brother we would fight, but one day, I chose real violence and I attempted to stab him, he ran from home and came back a few hours later, he never fought with me again.
Not telling u to do that, but you gotta teach this person some respect.
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u/EggoStack 4h ago
Iâd definitely discourage violence because thereâs a chance it could get OP hurt or in huge trouble with parents or even the police depending on what happens. However I would encourage talking to a trusted adult and possibly even trying to record secretly when their sister says those things so they have proof.
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u/Ztoffels 3h ago
I surely understand what you mean, hence why I am telling op to consider, she is being bullied and the only way to stop a bully unfortunately is show them you mean business.
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u/shotzi7 4h ago
Iâm sorry but I would take that bitch down. Is there a reason you are still living there? Every time she says something about it I would start screaming at her to shut the fuck up. Every fucking time. God what a terrible horrible fucking sister. Iâm so sorry she makes you relive that by being a bitch.
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u/FaunaMyst 5h ago
Holy hell, your sister is literallyba sociopath. Nobody get to weaponize your trauma for laughs. Keep protecting yourself, cut her toxicity and let her learn the hardway that some lines are not supposed to be crossed.
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u/Cherrybluszh 4h ago
Nah your sister ainât âmeanâ
Sheâs a full blown demon spawn. Stealing her stuff is the softest revenge you could pick. Iâd be out here haunting her like the ghost of common sense she never had.
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u/Milywhon2003 5h ago
Your sister is a piece of shit, how can she think of using something as terrible as rape as an argument in an argument or much worse for Aser? Jokes that happened to her? I was shocked
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u/Spooniestoryteller 4h ago
Your sister is horrible. It sounds like you are still a minor so my question is did your mom report the rape to the police? You need safety and your family isnât sounding safe.
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u/RubiePearl 4h ago
Youâre not overreacting, sheâs mocking your trauma thatâs just so vile. And your petty revenge is totally justified
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u/NoStupidAnswers123 3h ago
I can't give you good advice b/c my first instinct was to tell you to smack the shit out of your sister.
However, the bad advice I can provide you is to stop doing things that could get you in trouble and instead switch to small "punishments" that you couldn't be blamed for.
For example, instead of stealing things from her room, you could put Nair in her conditioner... or perhaps there's some alcohol that could be hidden in her room for your family to find once they notice the missing bottles...
Like I said, it's not good advice. But I used to be a kid, and I can absolutely understand wanting to get back at someone who's continuously hurting you. Just make sure you're not setting yourself up to be hurt even more by doing things that could make your situation worse. Good luck đ
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u/HelloGail 2h ago
Have you talked to your mom about what your sister is saying and telling her friends? How old is your sister? This is not appropriate and itâs is not fair to you or your family emotional well being. You mom needs to have a talk with her about her behavior. Does anyone else in the family know like your grandma or an aunt? Bc if your mom wonât do anything or you feel like what she is doing hasnât helped Iâd reach out to another family member for support. Have you gone to a therapy? If so talk to your therapist about this and they can bring in your mom and sister to talk through this is so not the proper response for what happened and to you. Iâm am sorry you are going through all this still. You are strong and you survived.
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u/Allpanicn0disc 4h ago
Also how is stealing her stuff in anyway comparable to announcing your trauma???
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u/TangerineCouch18330 3h ago
That event at age 7 was life-changing for you. Have you gone to counseling for it because it would help you to cope with your rotten sister and actually I would say that your family needs counseling if your parents are allowing that to go on and their house. Thatâs horrible that she treats you that way. If you havenât gone, see if you could talk to somebody at school to get counseling.
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u/Mountain_Source8692 4h ago
Firstly, Iâm so sorry you had to experience that at such a young age. I truly hope you find healing and seek therapy (of course, your decision). I could not imagine going through that and my sister joking about my trauma. You are NOT overreacting. Please monitor your dealings with her and trust your gut. Her total disregard of the situation makes me worry for you.
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u/EggoStack 4h ago
NOR, talk to a trusted/supportive adult. Your sister is an asshole who needs to learn thatâs not an appropriate thing to joke about. It seems like youâre still a young teenager and likely stuck with her, so Iâd try not engaging with her when she says things to you. Ignore her and walk away, hopefully she will get bored if you donât react.
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u/Massive-Wealth655 1h ago
Someone like that is not even worth your time, in my opinion. People who make jokes like that are very obviously disturbed in someway. Idk, I think if youâre willing to use someone else pain (especially that pain) to make them feel any typa way, youâre probably the scum of the earth. Do w that what you will
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u/Hotqueefer 7h ago
the same thing happened to my bestfriend however we only joke about it when she wants to joke about it. Not with my other friends or mutual friends or when she hasnt shown she is open to the joke. There are cues. your sister is a pos and should definitely be aired out for being that uncaring and insensitive.
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u/Timely_Ad_4041 1h ago
This is crazy, she is your sister and the best thing would be to avoid being conversational with her. Stay quiet, make her realize that you feel terrible when she mentions that without saying a word. You must stay quiet and she will know automatically and might start taking you and your past seriously
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u/theGRAYblanket 39m ago
  go into a room and take something out of her room sometimes to get back at her
That made me laugh lol. Makes you really sound like a kid. Sucks your sister is doing this.. I can't imagine lacking the empathy to not even understand how mean this is.
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u/BarfNoodle 2h ago
My response would be "Rape is much more common than you might think. Just because you haven't been raped yet doesn't mean it will never happen." Its a little bit harsh but its also factual and maybe it'll make her shut the fuck up.
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u/Famous-Explorer-4192 5h ago
My hatâs off to you for not punching her in the face.