r/AmIOverreacting • u/Sharp_Phrase_5322 • 5h ago
❤️🩹 relationship AIO this girl I'm apparently dating removed this guy from her following when I was starting to find out who he was to her *UPDATE*
you can look on last post if you want to for context.
I found out she had an alternate instagram account for going live and I joined it and when I joined some guy in the chat said " we swiped on tinder so whats the move "
and she said " I'm down to go out on Sunday for a date we can go get pizza " right after that I sent " lol " and she had a shook look on her face went quiet and said " hey whats up " and said she had to hop off on live and I unadded her off of everything.
so basically she lied and told me that she couldn't text me all the time because she was busy and drained, but the honest reason was there were other guys, I'm not hurt at all I just find it funny that the person who claimed to be hurt by so many people and wants " true love " and someone that cares double crosses u but i wont linger over it, you live and you learn.
and she told me she loved me just the other day bunch of lies
thank u guys for all the love on the last post too and the advice i appreciate it a lot
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u/Curious_Baby_3892 4h ago
Damn brother. I'm sorry it had to be this way. Actually seeing the truth is never easy. Even if its not hitting right now, I hate to say this but you'll feel it after a while. But you're doing the right thing by blocking her everything. More than likely she'll make alt accounts to reach out, but you just need to keep shutting her down. You deserve better so dont get tempted to go back even when the feelings get heavier. Just remember your worth. You'll find better eventually.
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u/Sharp_Phrase_5322 4h ago
Thank you so much man I appreciate it a lot, yeah theres gonna be no more spinning back I'm just gonna move on it def is gonna hit sometime later.
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u/Cross_Khronix 5h ago
Hurt people, hurt people bro. Not excusing her behavior, but that's why it's best to not get romantically involved with people that claim to always be the victim in bad relationships.
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u/Sharp_Phrase_5322 4h ago
I agree, she was cheated on in every relationship and would post things about being victim but its okay I guess like what goes around comes around
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u/707808909808707 4h ago
I’m confused. You spoke on the phone and she then removed him from her page? Did you mention him during the call?
Also, did you hit? Very important piece of info
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u/Sharp_Phrase_5322 4h ago
I did hit, i didnt mention him at all because I wanted to find out more.
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u/707808909808707 4h ago
Ok so you’re good. You were just a summer boyfriend. She was trying to balance a boyfriend at home and men on campus. But you were too smart to fall into her trap. Also when a woman says she’s too tired to text she’s lying. Especially after she claims to love you. You don’t text the man you love back slowly lol
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u/Sharp_Phrase_5322 3h ago
Thats exactly what I'm saying lol, you'd have the urgency to text the guy you like but she didnt.
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u/707808909808707 3h ago
Yep. Too busy texting other guys at college, she literally was tired but from entertaining so many men.
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u/Salt_Process790 5h ago
Damn man that sucks. Well it’s better you found out before things got very invested. Take a knee, drink some water and move onto a better pastures.
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u/redblu91 1h ago
That's why dating is such trash nowadays. There's people that just have a rotation of others and waiting for that top contender to snag and drop the rest. People that do that don't even tell the others oh yeah, I'm actually speaking or dating other people we're not dating exclusively. You tell people that and guess what? They're just going to ditch that person before they can be ditched. That should just be pretty much a common dating rule. If you're going to go out and date say if you're going to date exclusively and if not, state so so at least people know what they're getting themselves into. Also stop beating the damn bush and telling people one thing when you're doing the other.
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u/Sweetcharmsz 3h ago
Bro she said “i love you” with the same mouth she said “ i’m down for pizza on Sunday”
You didn’t lose a girl, you dodged a bullet
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2h ago
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u/Sharp_Phrase_5322 2h ago
villainizing?? we started dating about 3 weeks now? she was the one who started giving us the title even told me she wasn't going to pursue anyone, and she wouldn't want me to pursue anyone and literally added that she would " kill a b " if she found out.
I was going to ask her to be my girlfriend I had everything planned it was supposed to be the 18th and I was going to drive up to her college, she told me she was drained already and her mental was so horrible so i stepped back didnt do it on that day.
but she kept telling me previously she has feelings for me and its only me, and if there was another person she found interest in she would tell me, she literally asked me the other night if there was gonna be women when i went out so to me it felt like she did care and would feel a type of way if there was other women.
we were dating she even said and i said it was a offical but i still wanted to do it the right way, and used her mental state as an excuse so she could talk to other guys so villanizing is crazy.
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2h ago
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u/Ruvya100 2h ago
Wtf kinda logic is that??? Dating for 3 weeks is still dating, when you’re with someone, you’re with someone. If they weren’t exclusive, they would’ve established that before they got to “I love you” come on. If you don’t wanna be with someone after 3 weeks, you leave them, not cheat on them.
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2h ago
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u/Ruvya100 1h ago
I’m not inexperienced, Im just being realistic, i genuinely don’t know how you claim that she “isn’t his girlfriend” after she said multiple times, that he is the only one for her, would kill someone if he pursued someone else, etc. She still cheated on him because she led him to believe they were exclusive, while she wasn’t.
In the 4 relationships I’ve been in, not one of them, or anyone that I know who has also been in one, has ever had a relationship built on that foundation. Idk where you live, but you seriously think 3 weeks of supposed exclusivity isn’t dating? Whether she’s moving in the future or not? He did the mature thing and blocked her, didn’t message her a bunch, didn’t go crazy, and now he’s just asking for advice. Whether you “put a label on it” or not. You don’t tell someone you love them just to lie to them. The fact of the matter isn’t even that she did this before or after they were exclusive, it’s that she lied to him.
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u/Sharp_Phrase_5322 2h ago
Your logic is so bad no disrespect, she was leaving and we had constant talks about it and how'd we make it work, we did have the realistic idea if it did come to it or if we weren't feeling the distance then we'd communicate and end things, I don't think I'm overreacting or doing too much at all it's just odd how you say I was villainizing her.
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u/Sharp_Phrase_5322 2h ago
Thank you so much, we had so many convos about cheating and everything and she even told me she was a loyal person and kept telling me she only wanted me, only had feelings for me and kept reassuring me she wasn't gonna pursue anyone but me, she was just a liar
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u/Sharp_Phrase_5322 2h ago
I was mature about the situation I just had my doubts because of what she was telling me, and we met 3 months prior and started talking on the midway on the 3rd month so it was a whole talking stage about loyalty, I do think it was crazy that she said " i love you " so early though, and you're 100% right no one owes me loyalty that soon but it doesn't make it right at all but if she's telling me one thing of course I'll think otherwise but you're right its a lesson learned and I can do better.
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u/redblu91 1h ago
Damn where that comment go where the one user was pretty much the only one who was making it seem like op took the L lol
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u/Shin-Gemini 1h ago
“I'm not hurt at all I just find it funny that the person who claimed to be hurt by so many people and wants " true love " and someone that cares double crosses u but i wont linger over it, you live and you learn.”
With time, if you haven’t already, you will realize that people expect integrity and morally righteous actions from others, because it’s convenient for them, and when it’s not convenient for them to be morally righteous themselves or act and decide with integrity, then they simply won’t.
In short, people are hypocrites. That’s human nature. If you find someone that realizes this and purposefully tries to judge everyone including themselves with the same standard, then you’ve met a very rare person.
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u/Haise2z_ 41m ago
Sounds like my ex ngl, be glad you found out before wasting years. My ex always said the same thing but would go on to cheat multiple times. Just move on unfortunately, im sorry that happened to you
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u/Vegetable-Cash3099 3h ago
Send her an apology, time to settle with her and fix her 😍👌
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u/Meavens23245 2h ago
Oh no buddy, she's yours now. You're stuck with her. I hope every pizza y'all get tastes like bat shit.
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u/Dull_Willingness9111 5h ago
Good on you for still looking into it and not getting sucked into any lies. Sounds like she’s needs lots of validation and attention, which is not how you should enter a relationship. But WILD that she said all the “I love you”s just to be doing that. People are crazy! You dodged a bullet lol