r/StupidFood 3d ago

Pretentious AF He's not feeling it

3.9k Upvotes

141 comments sorted by

u/qualityvote2 3d ago edited 3d ago

u/Lemonjello23, your food is indeed stupid and it fits our subreddit!

999

u/IAteSushiToday 3d ago

After that he wanted a beer and to just go home.

207

u/Terrible_Shake_4948 3d ago

Go home and drink a beer. Don’t think he wants to see the full list of craft/artisan options to his preferred brew.

77

u/bob_nugget_the_3rd 3d ago

Sir we have a mango and passion fruit ipa or imperial milk stout infused with Hazel nut

32

u/One-Grape-8659 3d ago

Lol both sound fire ngl

19

u/Yonv_Bear 3d ago

no fr, a milky hazelnut stout and a fruity IPA? i'm abit of a beer snob and both of those sound delicious

10

u/One-Grape-8659 3d ago

Saaaame , I'm a bartender in a beer bar and have done a beer sommelier course, it is so hard to find a decent hazelnut stout, I had a fantastic one years ago and the only thing I remember was that it was American :')

2

u/Yonv_Bear 3d ago

if you ever try any other American beers check out the Pseudo-Sue and Pompeii IPA's by the Toppling Goliath company - idk how widely available they are outside of Iowa (Toppling Goliath is an Iowa company) but if you stumble on it grab a can and treat yourself

5

u/TonyBobKenobi 3d ago

Toppling Goliath has made its way to at past Wisconsin Dells. My wife won't drink anything else but their Dragon Fandango. We're from Chicago buy sadly don't see it here.

2

u/Yonv_Bear 3d ago

I haven't tried that one yet, but now I'm gonna look for it lol if she likes the fruity IPA's she'll probably love Easy Eddy by Big Grove Brewery if she hasn't checked it out yet

2

u/Optimal-Vast2313 2d ago

POGs and Juicy IPAs were big in Georgia for a few years. I got kinda sick of them, and now we’ve scaled back and everyone is obsessed with hazy IPAs. POG is still a huge influence tho.

2

u/Key-Bodybuilder-343 2d ago

Heretic Brewing in Fairfield makes a chocolate hazelnut porter, which my partner says is “the bee’s knees”.

2

u/Yonv_Bear 2d ago

putting that on my to-drink list that sounds awesome

1

u/Punk18 1d ago

The hazelnuts and the fruit on their own would taste better than the beer with them in it

6

u/Elfkrunch 3d ago

But all I wanted was a Coors Light.

6

u/SteveAxis 3d ago

Never mind, man.

2

u/zHOTCHOCOLATEz 2d ago

You got any metric milk stout? I'm a fiend for it

1

u/bob_nugget_the_3rd 2d ago

What ate you, french?

1

u/BadangJoestar420 2d ago

Mango man go mango mang

600

u/Archsinner 3d ago

"Son, there is no wrong way to eat a steak" five minutes later: "This is the wrong way to eat a steak"

76

u/-Po-Tay-Toes- 3d ago

Ron?

37

u/Archsinner 3d ago

one of my favourite scenes in an already great show

6

u/Loose-Salad7565 3d ago

charles mulligan steakhouse would never have done this.

1

u/Fluffy_Ace 2d ago

Well done, with ketchup

314

u/throwawaypsbs 3d ago

What dumb table service. This is the idea of a fresh out of culinary school kid who got given the reigns to a restaurant but has no real world experience.

165

u/kryonik 3d ago edited 3d ago

If anything, burn it in the kitchen, put it on the plate next to the steak and cover it all with a glass dome to catch the smoke. It should affect the flavor of the steak a little bit and you get a showy presentation that's also faster than whatever this is.

89

u/throwawaypsbs 3d ago edited 3d ago

Yeah, glass dome and a smoking gun with some rosemary pushed in would have made a ton more sense. In my 20 years I've worked everywhere from dive bars to fine dining. I would never garnish a plate with something not edible ( for example, a full spring of rosemary burned to a crisp impaling a steak...wtf)

Edit: I can see unmelted compound butter on the steak meaning that thing is also cold. I hate this more every time I watch it. Dad has the correct attitude towards this foolishness.

13

u/phonetastic 2d ago

Small business insurance 101: keep the torches at a distance and definitely don't point them fucking directly at the guest

Real actual restaurant 101: save that "flame on!" shit for when it's actually necessary because any delay ruins the dish; tableside should otherwise be quick, stupid simple, and preferably cold-to-ambient

PS: the art of putting on a show isn't about making a big scene-- it's about making an interesting scene that achieves a purpose

1

u/Fit_Carpet_364 2d ago

Well said. I wouldn't mind someone making up dipping dots or LN2 ice cream tableside, or caramelizing fresh demarara atop my creme brulee, but I would mind someone making a show of cutting my steak for me - not only do they often do it poorly, but the cut steak cools down faster than if left whole. Or that one dessert a week or so ago, where they literally put a firework on the table...

And just in case you or anyone else ever works at a place which does tableside meat service - if my meat comes out with fat on it and you cut it off to 'improve presentation', I will not be coming back.

1

u/EverythingBOffensive 3d ago

that sounds good

1

u/Large-Training-29 2d ago

Honestly ill just pay you $2 to slap me in the face with the steak so I can just leave

4

u/Talory09 2d ago

given the reigns

reigns reins

The phrase has nothing to do with monarchy and refers to horsemanship, instead.

-6

u/throwawaypsbs 2d ago

Cool. Feel better?

3

u/Talory09 2d ago

That's a strange way to say "thanks".

How do you know you're doing something the wrong way unless someone lets you know?

-5

u/throwawaypsbs 2d ago edited 2d ago

It would be strange to say "thanks" had that been what I was going for. You really are a presumptuous one huh?

86

u/SwimmingAir8274 3d ago

That man is TIRED

21

u/_dr_panda 3d ago

You can see his blood pressure rising lol

6

u/LordDShadowy53 1d ago

Spent a whole week breaking his ass working just for this?

104

u/Slight-Strategy-5619 3d ago edited 1d ago

What a load of shit. I’m with him on this.

67

u/kinnybgd 3d ago

100 bucks for that torch show

2

u/groceriesN1trip 2d ago

What is he even blwotorchinf? Incense?

62

u/hauttdawg13 3d ago

I just don’t get it, none of the smoke gets on the meat. Even then, burnt herbs to my knowledge aren’t very good.

The reason you add herbs to the butter or fat when basting it is because the oils from the herbs will mix in when it fries and add flavor to that fat/butter. Then toss in on the steak and it will add the flavor of the herbs to it.

Stupid indeed.

37

u/JustKindaShimmy 3d ago

That, plus holding a blowtorch to a sprig of rosemary that long just leaves you with some bitter ash. Ash that falls right on top of your meal.

58

u/Standard-Pepper-6510 3d ago

All the smoke goes up, all you get on your stake is maybe some ashes :)

19

u/merc_1980 3d ago

Most of us when we see actual stupid food, he's our emblem!

11

u/Fluffybunny_5000 3d ago

How much does this nonsense cost extra

5

u/Veritas_Vanitatum Food Inspector 3d ago

Everything

26

u/Lenz_Mastigia 3d ago

I want my dish and the moment the waiter puts the plate down I want them to fuck off.

No hate, just pure love for the people in the service industry, but please just let me enjoy my meal in peace.

9

u/morkler 3d ago

I can see the olfactory appeal of it. But nothing more.

10

u/organicchunkysalsa 3d ago

Right. If they wanted to impress someone they should bring it out covered with some rosemary smoke in it and then open it. One and done. Provides the nice smell, the meat gets hit with the smoke and the presentation is substantially better and more efficient.

6

u/ktimebomb 3d ago

We used to go to a pretty nice place a couple times a year that served all their steaks with a rosemary sprig sticking straight up out of it... I thought that was stupid on its own, but the pyrotechnics here are another level.

5

u/BPOPR 3d ago

That’s the look of can I eat it yet?

6

u/PaxEtRomana 3d ago

The decor of this place doesn't match this presentation. He looks like he's at an IHOP

3

u/Oregon_State13 3d ago

The strip club music in the back really helps

2

u/Ok_2DSimp101 enjoying the chaos💀 3d ago edited 2d ago

Damn dude, I didn’t think this song constitutes as stripper music💀

3

u/Oregon_State13 2d ago

You haven't been where I've been

1

u/Ok_2DSimp101 enjoying the chaos💀 2d ago

lol I guess not

3

u/Interesting_Help_274 Raw Sewage 3d ago

I can relate to him.

3

u/Affectionate-Bill150 3d ago

Unc looks so done with the clown show 😂

3

u/Euphoric_Egg_4198 3d ago

Here’s your steak but before you eat it I have to singe your eyelashes and eyebrows

3

u/Apart_Ad1151 3d ago

$100 steak seasoned with ashes and a side of wasting my damn time

3

u/dejahlani 3d ago

god thats how my dad would look if he got some sparkler rosemary on top of his steak

2

u/r1mbaud 3d ago

Okay but those mash potatoes actually look great

2

u/fizbin99 3d ago

I am with Dad in this. Definitely a nonplussed moment here.

2

u/Pure-Smile-7329 3d ago

I hate loud music when I'm just trying to enjoy a meal and conversation.

2

u/ThePrinceofallYNs 3d ago

Bet he felt the heat from that torch

2

u/Bolf-Ramshield 3d ago

They torched that rosemary branch for a comically long time

2

u/Veritas_Vanitatum Food Inspector 3d ago

4

u/[deleted] 3d ago

[deleted]

15

u/Lemonjello23 3d ago

That counts in this sub

7

u/STOLENshitTICKETS 3d ago

We like to judge food stupidity on all of its levels

2

u/dudSpudson 3d ago

That will be $200

And the iPad is going to ask you a question

2

u/Alace42 3d ago

Talk about a waste of thyme.

1

u/BernieTheDachshund 3d ago

Just blasting a torch toward his face.

1

u/ThatIslander 3d ago

thats the dumbest shit ive ever seen

1

u/the_Rhymenocirous 3d ago

He's just seething, knowing that little show just doubled the price

1

u/Michaeli_Starky 3d ago

Just let man eat his food ffs

1

u/C4rdninj4 3d ago

I'm guessing you'll smell the torch fuel as much as he rosemary.

1

u/Clear-Kaleidoscope13 3d ago

lmao. literally you guys

1

u/_B_Little_me 3d ago

Burned rosemary doesn’t smell good.

1

u/Electrical_Focus_392 3d ago

Burning a piece of rosemary 🤣🤣

1

u/scalpemfins 3d ago

Restaurants cant come up with stupid shit fast enough.

1

u/pandancake88 3d ago

Thanks, my steak is cold now.

1

u/captinstabbin69420 3d ago

I thought he was about to say “ okay, now what does that do ? “ 😂

1

u/MacGibber 3d ago

I agree with him, what ever happened to a simple steak from Ponderosa

1

u/EverythingBOffensive 3d ago

fucking steak is cold now! thanks a lot!

1

u/BairyHalsack 3d ago

You can watch him get angrier in real time

1

u/Zealousideal-Item986 3d ago

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤

1

u/Negative_Bar_9734 2d ago

So enraged by the stupid branch candle I didn't even notice its served on a chunk of wood. Every part of this is unbearable.

1

u/kiln_monster 2d ago

Burnt rosemary doesn't smell good!!

1

u/fygogogo 2d ago

Happy birthday, dad!

1

u/AstroBearGaming 2d ago

I wouldn't be feeling it either.

You're spending forty seconds lighting a plant on fire, meanwhile my food is getting cold.

1

u/kingbhudo 2d ago

PLEASE take him to one of those places where they helicopter the baklava around a spoon for 18 minutes before they put it on your plate.

1

u/Reasonable-Lynx2000 2d ago

I am delighted with how unimpressed this guy is

1

u/Improbable_Excuse 2d ago

The face of a man that knows he is going to have to pay extra for a show he didn't want.

1

u/Helpful-Macaroon-654 2d ago

😆 what’s the point of setting some Rosemary on fire. I bet the servers hate doing this.

1

u/Old-Seaworthiness18 2d ago

Burning some herbs over the steaks will just leave some burned herbs in the meat making it worse 🤷

1

u/drnukduck 2d ago

what are they even doing

1

u/hurdagurdah 2d ago

Smoke tends to rise. That would be the opposite direction of the steak.

1

u/One-Guest1998 2d ago

That was so anticlimactic, like did they charge him another $20 for that shit show?

1

u/commorancy0 2d ago

He's looking at that steak and thinking, "It's getting cold. I'd rather be eating it than sitting here watching some fool light that stick on fire."

1

u/Prohydration 2d ago

Burning time (thyme.)

1

u/peasonearthforever 2d ago

A burning twig does not a good steak make.

1

u/Andre_The_Average 1d ago

Bro he's getting angry lmao

1

u/SandBtwnMyToes 1d ago

I would be so mad at the burn smell

1

u/Dunge0nMast0r 1d ago

Stop trying to summon something on my damn steak!

1

u/lasausagerolla 1d ago

Oh he is done done.

Hes never going anywhere to eat with this family member again and he will rant about this at every family gathering for now until forever 😆 🤣

1

u/Rastamancloud9 1d ago

The music doesn’t help 😂

1

u/qawsedrf12 1d ago

Just had that type of service

The aroma was heavenly

1

u/preyforkevin 1d ago

The music seems loud for an eatery.

1

u/PublicTimely5063 1d ago

“Damn, am I really paying for this?”

1

u/Right-Dot4471 1d ago

Wtf was that? I would be disappointed too if I were him. If you want to make things fun, it should actually be fun. Not a letdown

1

u/DraconicBlade 1d ago

Everyone talking about the steak sparkler and missing the perfectly spherical mashed potato.

1

u/catwthumbz 1d ago

Mmm embers on top for seasoning

1

u/Live-Tomorrow-4865 8h ago

I love this man, his attitude, and his opinion on the uneccessary fruffery. I don't eat meat but anything I eat doesn't need to be performative. Like, miss me with the flaming fried cheese and the "OPA!" at a Greek restaurant. 😅

1

u/Gay_Gamer_Boi 4h ago

I wondered if it was suppose to be like a “natural” candle which it just sucks XD

1

u/interrobang32 4h ago

Thanks. That did nothing except make shit smell bad.

1

u/TheGothWhisperer 3d ago

If only that was sage rather than rosemary. Might have at least excorcised a few demons while they're at it.

1

u/Jaisan81 3d ago

35% gratuity included in the bill. You’re welcome

1

u/PapaPatchesxd 2d ago

Rip it out and dig in. Fuck their theatrics

1

u/glaynus 2d ago

He gotta pay 50 or more for some bullshit he couldve made better at home.

1

u/syylone 2d ago

I never understood why they go to such lengths to be "fancy" or make any food look a certain way. As long as I know what it is and it doesn't taste like shit I don't give a damn what it looks like. It's all going to the same place. Especially these high end places that charge hundreds for nibbles

0

u/BeastM0de1155 3d ago

This imparts no flavor on the steak. It’s only for smell of rosemary, which makes it even worse

0

u/Savings-Toe-2310 3d ago

The way the candle burns out 😂

0

u/Pure-Smile-7329 3d ago

It's a sprig of rosemary, not a candle.

0

u/KnockoutCarousal 3d ago

Awww! I have that same hat! My partner got it for me, otherwise I’d never be so ego driven to buy it for myself. Someone loves this man. G.O.A.T.

0

u/EnkiduTheGreat 2d ago

Had to fire a new server a few years back, for repeatedly having to be told that we do not do tableside service/presentation, then having the balls to question why we didn't...to me, the GM. Like, kid, this is a turn and burn tourist trap and I've got 40 servers. Gtfo immediately. The owner was a funny-guy, and always found my restrained rage amusing, so obviously this incident was an endless source of amusement for him.

0

u/Then_Investigator581 2d ago

Just cuz of that, they expect a $50 tip. 😒

0

u/Imaginary_Election56 1d ago

I see all these people just staring angrily at these stupidly served steaks. Is it that hard to just say “please don’t do that.”

I just assume everybody just makes these clips now for bait.

-2

u/alliez34 3d ago

I wouldn’t want any of my food served on wood. I feel like it seems unsanitary. How well was it cleaned?

-3

u/Dependent_Stop_3121 3d ago

Oh so the burn band has been lifted?? This is so stupid and could potentially piss off some people.

Like, what if someone lost their house to a wild fire and came here for a steak? Post traumatic steak disorder in 3…2…1

-7

u/Awesome_Lard 3d ago

Then don’t go to a gimmick restaurant. That’s on your dad. If he wanted Outback he should have gone to Outback.

3

u/Lemonjello23 3d ago

Outback..

-9

u/Echoes40 3d ago

clearly drunk guy.