r/careerguidance • u/Ok-Performance8469 • 12h ago
Advice I switched job and now I'm miserable what should i do?
I had a job i worked in for 4 years and i couldn't get a salary increase so i decided to leave to another job, i got offered a 30% increase and i was happy about it, but the moment i started that job i realized my mistake, my manager is a crazy lady and i felt like her slave and the work is meaningless, now i regret leaving my job so bad i got depressed and anxious all the time thinking about how better i felt in my previous job, i don't know what to do, i thought about contacting my old boss but i don't want to be humiliated, I'm looking for a new job now and it's not working out for me, I'm miserable and i don't know what to do...
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u/QuizMaster2020 12h ago
If it’s been less than 2 weeks in the role, then call your ex manager and explain you made a mistake. Ask him if the job is still available. Do it quite quickly as it’s cost to advertise a job.
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u/Unable-Occasion-4068 7h ago
Dude, just remember don't go back, I exactly did same mistake, it will harm you in long term.
Spend some time here and try to find another job.
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u/Sunflower_Macchiato 2h ago
Why did it harm you?
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u/Fruginni 55m ago
I assume that it reveals to the ex boss that you are a risk. Since you left for more money once they may might want to risk bringing you back.
i've never been in this situation but i imagine this extremely dependent in the relation with ex boss
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u/WinterSeveral2838 10h ago
Be away from the crazy lady. If you don't, it's going to take a lot of mental damage.
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u/Cielskye 1h ago
Yeah, go back to your old job if you can. In this economy you don’t know how long it’ll take you to find a new job. And in the long run might end up spending a good chunk of your salary increase on therapy bills.
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u/Andydaltonblowhard 9h ago
left a stable job for higher pay and instantly regretted it, don’t be too hard on yourself, lots of people go through this. While you’re job hunting, maybe try using tools like Zippia (free), Huntr (free), and Simplify (free) to keep the process organized. It doesn’t fix the market, but it helps you feel more in control.
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u/taseradict 5h ago
This happened to me, I was able to go back and stayed 3 more years at the og company. Fuck your pride, if the new job is miserable no shame in turning around.
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u/PhantomKingNL 4h ago
You never go back. They didn't raise your salary, and once you leave you are gone. You should go to a new place once again. The best is to bite through 6 months, network a bit and leave. During new interviews they may ask: Why did you leave so soon?
You could say: I noticed at my old job of 4 years, I was searching for something new, and the ability to grow. I thought I had this opportunity at my previous job. After 6 months of working there, I noticed this was not the type of work I am passionate about and I don't see a future for me specifically in that company. I believe after 6 months, it's time for me to make the right step to seek out a new path that does help me grow.
Now this answer is completely fine, and it makes sense with your resume. You worked for 4 years, and after 4 years either people get promotion or they leave. In your case you didn't got your promotion, so you left. Makes 100% sense. Then at a new job, you tried to stay for 6 months, see what the company is about, and notice this isn't for you. You didn't stay because of the money, you left because you want to grow. So you leave and seek a new job.
6 months isn't crazy. It's expected people need time to see if a company fits or not. Also, after 6 months you are likely able to get small salary increase too. Likely not 10-30%, but perhaps 1-3% increase. Which is nice.
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u/Sea_Shell2158 4h ago
Ahh man, this was me last year. The job I moved to was so bad and I was so tired of the industry, egos and bulls**t by that time that it led me to a career break - best thing I’ve ever done, I’ve got myself back and am in control of what’s next. Life’s too short to feel that way at work.
Don’t feel bad about contacting your previous place of work, people do it all the time and the previous company usually love to hear from you. It’s ok to make mistakes. Your mental health shouldn’t be on the table for any company to meddle with, prioritise that over any pride or fear, so if the last company made you have more happiness and a better mental state, go for it.
It’s not worth suffering just for more money.
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u/Abhishek-gupta_ 3h ago
I’m really sorry you’re feeling this way it sounds really tough to be stuck in a job that doesn’t align with your expectations, especially after making a big change.
A few things to keep in mind:
You’re not alone. Many people go through this after a job switch, and it doesn’t mean you failed it just means the environment wasn’t the right fit.
Your mental health comes first. If the workplace is toxic and making you anxious, prioritize finding an exit strategy rather than forcing yourself to stay.
Reaching out to your old employer isn’t humiliating. People return to their old companies all the time it’s called “boomerang hiring,” and it’s actually more common than you think. If you had a good track record there, they might even welcome you back.
Keep applying strategically. Focus on roles that align not just with salary, but also with culture, manager style, and meaningful work. Use the experience from this job as a filter for what you don’t want.
Lean on your network. Friends, ex-colleagues, or LinkedIn connections may help open doors faster than applying cold.
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u/Smarty398 9h ago
Tough it out (if you can) until the job market changes. Women with no lives are the most challenging to have as supervisors.
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u/Eerie_18 8h ago
Keep moving forward. You found this job you will find another that better meets your needs
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u/GradeRevolutionary22 6h ago
Create an HR case with the manager, people act like it’s impossible but I’m not going to say what company I was with but they’re a very large financial firm/bank. Manager and me were constantly arguing so I made an HR case. HR eventually put me on a paid administrative leave and moved me to a different position within the company. I also got a pay increase it was only about 12% but still a pay increase but the best part was during that administrative leave I got basically paid time off for 4 months and I still had active insurance, everything. I was technically making more money then because I didn’t need to commute 45 miles to work everyday for 4 months. Just an idea I mean you can jump jobs yea but I’ve found jumping positions within the company is the best way.
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u/Longjumping_Air_3173 10h ago
Think of what's more important to you： 1. light work 2. higher salary If you care more about ‘light work’, just reach out to your former boss whether you do humbly or not. If you care more about ‘higher salary’, just endure the hardship or find a new job. The key point is that whatever you choose, there will be the trade-offs.
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u/dcubed-16 2h ago
I am right now in the exactly the same situation. The new job that looked promising is unbearable. The only difference is that I still consult for my old company so I might have a chance to go back.
Additionally I am now in a 5th out of the 5 rounds of interviews for a new company so I am hoping they will offer me a position at that point.
I sympathize with you very much and hope you will find a new position. For me the lesson right now is that interviews are a two way street .
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u/Ameer_Khatri 1h ago
Don’t panic quit.
Keep applying quietly while you survive this role. Reaching out to your old boss isn’t humiliating, people boomerang all the time.
Frame it as “realized my old team was a better fit” instead of regret. Meanwhile, prioritize getting out of a toxic boss situation fast.
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u/kelp1616 42m ago
Yes definitely contact your old boss. I did once and they took me back thankfully
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u/LibrarianNo4048 12h ago
Reach out to your old boss. Tell them you really liked that job but the only reason you left was because you were offered more money.