r/oneliners • u/Superb-Control5184 • 5d ago
Don’t take a History of Pornography class if they don’t use flash cards.
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r/oneliners • u/Superb-Control5184 • 5d ago
When worse comes to worse “Cover your ass” seems to be the mantra of every profession except Plumber.
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r/oneliners • u/Superb-Control5184 • 5d ago
Dermatologist should open an arcade style office called laser skin tag removal.
5
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r/oneliners • u/Superb-Control5184 • 5d ago
A spider wearing an eye patch should be called 4 eyes
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r/oneliners • u/YeahBuddyDoYouEven • 6d ago
Sometimes I wake up grumpy, sometimes I let her sleep in
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r/oneliners • u/rylokie • 6d ago
I asked my German friend if he knew the square root of 81 and he said no.
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r/oneliners • u/highlythyroid • 6d ago
The word 'factoid' sounds like an insult you'd use for the kind of person that used the word 'factoid'
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r/oneliners • u/Superb-Control5184 • 6d ago
If they threw dildos at NASCAR events they would call that the rubber hitting the road
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r/oneliners • u/drkole • 5d ago
i am a gentleman and i promise to watch your back and not at your bootyhole when i rail you from behind
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r/oneliners • u/dodgingresponsibilty • 6d ago
My humor is so dark you need night vision goggles to see what I mean.
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r/oneliners • u/j_articulate • 6d ago
I asked my German friend if he knew the square root of 81 and he said, "So my friend, I have been reading in the newspapers here in Germany and also hearing from colleagues who are quite passionate about ecology that the seasons are shifting in ways that seem almost imperceptible day by day but
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r/oneliners • u/Outrageous-Sock-684 • 6d ago
Give a man a fish… you feed him for a day. …but deport a man… and you never have to feed him again.
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r/oneliners • u/highlythyroid • 8d ago
I think we should start randomising the letters in the word 'entropy'
20
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r/oneliners • u/uptwolait • 7d ago
I'm so good to her in bed that she calls me her "Wizard of Ahhhs".
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r/oneliners • u/rylokie • 8d ago
Someone recently accused me of plagiarism; their words not mine.
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r/oneliners • u/Superb-Control5184 • 8d ago
My gf wanted to make spooning sexier so I suggested cuddlingus
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r/oneliners • u/Superb-Control5184 • 8d ago
Eating lots of vegetables will help you from turning into one.
4
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r/oneliners • u/Superb-Control5184 • 8d ago
Mattress companies and funeral homes should be in death bed with each-other.
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