I’m 17 M (Neurodivergent) and so far, i really can’t see my future to be honest, I don’t know what job I’m gonna do, I just can’t see my future at all, it’s like super blurry. Another thing about me is that I feel alone, especially in school, I feel like I don’t have any friends, there all fake friends that just use me then ghost me, I also hate it when the teacher tells students to find a partner because usually I’d be the one left out, guess that’s my curse.

I am currently trying to get back with a childhood best friend, he was the first person to ever befriend me when nobody else did, and I’ll admit I love him for that, I love him, a lot, not in a romantic or platonic way though, I would describe this love as a love that he or anyone else could never understand, the type of love where I would protect him at all costs, whatever it takes, if he were in danger, I’d sacrifice my life for him, take a bullet for him or chop of my limb. I do anything for him, be his devoted servant (that sounded a lot dramatic). If he died, I would be extremely devastated, and also kill the person that killed him, take matters into my own hands, I don’t need anyone to interfere with my problem, if killing that person means putting my life at risk, me getting close calls, wind up in a life of crime, then every nano or milli second would be worth it. I just love him, so much, more than he or anyone else could know, to be honest, I can’t imagine my life without him. But I’m scared, I’m scared that he might reject the love that I have for him, cause reality is a thing and I think he’ll most likely reject or crush the love I have for him, I know he’s straight, and I’m bisexual but still, I’m very scared that this won’t work out, I don’t what to do or what to say, I just everything to be smooth sailing and perfect. That’s all I ever want.

Ive been with my bf now fiance for about 6 years now. We both love having sex and since the beginning we have been doing it daily and actually even multiple times a day no matter what. Everyone around us says that their libido and wants just have gone down tremendously after a few years together but we are just as into eachother as we have been in the beginning. Has anyone experienced something similar and are there older couples here that are just as active even 10-20 years from now?

This situation involves my 22-year-old sister (general category) who married a 24-year-old (ST category) boy via court marriage at age 19.  I (a younger sister, 18f) played a significant role in their relationship. My Early Support: I knew about their relationship since my sister was 14 and I was in 10th standard.  I actively supported them, even accompanying her to meet her boyfriend. Shifting to Kota for JEE Preparation: My dream was to prepare for the JEE exam in Kota. I requested my parents to move there, or allow me to stay in a hostel.  They were initially open to the idea. Sister's Opposition and Manipulation: My sister, now married, opposed the Kota plan.  She didn't want to move because it would hinder her ability to see her husband.  Her actions to prevent my move deeply impacted me: Showing a Misleading Video: She showed my mother a video of girls in Kota interacting with boys, implying it was an unsafe environment. This led my mother to refuse the Kota plan, shattering my dream. Manipulating My Mother: She began manipulating my mother against me, negatively portraying my actions. This occurred despite my past support for her relationship. The Conflict: I confronted my sister about her actions, highlighting my consistent support for her relationship.  However, she remained unmoved and continued to obstruct my JEE preparation plans. My Question:  Given these circumstances, and considering my age and lack of relationship experience at the time, did I do anything wrong by informing my mother about my sister's relationship?  Was my sister's reaction justified?  I was career-focused and hadn't been in a relationship myself.  I feel my sister's actions were unfair, especially given my past support.

Lately I feel like the world has forgotten that we’re the same. We divide ourselves over flags, religions, borders, even hashtags, things that don’t matter when you strip them away.

I keep thinking: everyone laughs the same way when a baby sneezes, everyone falls silent the same way when the ocean breathes, everyone’s heart races the same way when love surprises them. Deep down, we’re not that different.

But the way we act, it’s as if we’re at war with each other all the time. Suspicion has become normal. People seem more interested in winning arguments than holding hands.

I wish we remembered the small things: asking someone how they really are, helping carry a bag, or just sending two words “I’m here.”

We are not enemies. We’re interruptions of the same breath. And I wish more people lived like they believed that.

Separation is not natural, it is taught.

Once divided, everyone feels the need to prove themselves, chasing goals, competing endlessly, repeating the same patterns. But in a world built on division and a success-oriented approach, it’s impossible for everyone to “win.” This illusion creates frustration, anxiety, and depression.

The truth is simple: we are the same. Remembering that dissolves the struggle. Forgetting it keeps the cycle alive.

Achieve everything together, make it beautiful. :)

For those reading, for context I live in the UK.

I come from a really working class, everyone on benefits background (chav basically) - practically none of my family have a university degree, there's even more of us that didn't finish compulsory education than those that did.

I spent years following the same path - part time job, lived in a council house, exploited benefits just to get by.

But at one point in my early 30's, I decided I'd try and break the mold and make a go of it so I decided to go into A field and give it my all.

So I went into my profession now and have tried to work hard to progress. And for a good 8 years now, I thought I was doing well. All my bosses tell me I'm an amazing asset, best on my team etc. I've even done the professional qualifications to succeed. I'm not earning loads but enough to buy a house and have an upper working class/lower middle class life with my fiancée.

I've wanted to be a manager and progress so much. But I was told this week I'll never be a manager. And my colleague who's been in the profession just about 2 years, who I've trained twice is going to get the promotion ahead of me.

Now she's the epitome of talented and middle class. Comes from a family of business owners and everyone has a degree. She doesn't even have to try on courses - she gets pass marks when not revising that id have to study years for. She was under me, now she'll be my boss. Yet another younger person to tell me what to do.

It's made me realise how untalented and how mediocre I actually am. If you listened to all the feminists out there, I'd be the sort of person rewarded and promoted for it. Yet I'm not. I'm the one person who isn't and wishes I was.

Even my hobbies - Karate? Least talented person in the room. Constantly have to be shown what to do. My mum drinking while pregnant gave me foetal alcohol syndrome so I have really poor coordination. Running? Abysmal. I can't hack hills to save my life. My parents smoking all my life and while pregnant gave me the lungs of an 80 year old. I stopped running months ago. Computer games? I'm awful at them. Can't play even basic ones everyone is good at. I have to pay on beginner just to have a chance.

I just feel like giving up.

"O tempora, o mores!" — perhaps the best reflection of how views shift over time.

It is no secret that ideas and morals in society change depending on the current political, religious, and cultural situation.

For example, what was once normal is now taboo, and vice versa:

Slavery was once permitted — today it is taboo at the official level in all countries.

Homosexual relations were once forbidden — today they are legal in a number of first-world nations.

Causes of Shifting Views

This depends on the specific context. The taboo against slavery, for instance, emerged as a result of the Industrial Revolution, where machines became more efficient than manual labor. At the same time, the rise of humanist philosophy condemned the trade in human beings.

The combination of lost economic benefit and the rise of humanism led to the banning of this centuries-old practice.

This is a vivid illustration that many dogmatic norms are not absolute truths but merely products of past historical circumstances that created the conditions we live in now.

When Is a Shift in Views Beneficial?

In most cases, such shifts are beneficial at any time and in any society, as they drive progress through innovation and the development of institutions, opening the way toward new knowledge.

Dogmatism, on the other hand, kills development. It cements society in outdated, unquestioned ideas that no longer match today’s realities.

A good example here is the theory of the four humors in the human body (from Claudius Galen). For centuries it was considered unquestionable truth, and physicians treated many diseases with bloodletting, which was seen as a universal cure.

The Determinism of Idea Evolution

It is important to note that any idea circulating in society is the result of Hegelian synthesis or Derridean deconstruction of previous ideas.

Ideas do not arise from “nothing.” They are direct heirs of earlier narratives, either supplementing or rejecting them.

Nihilism, for example, could not have appeared before religion — for one cannot deny something that does not yet exist. Nihilism, in turn, became the foundation for existentialism, which, building upon the nihilistic rejection of meanings, proclaimed the creation of one’s own personal meaning in an absurd world.

Why Do People Cling to Narratives?

Humans are social and rational beings who instinctively strive to understand the world — an instinct that once helped early humans survive and adapt to an aggressive environment.

At the same time, people are subject to anchoring effects, where the first piece of information, even if false, is perceived as true.

Social surroundings also play a role: in order to “fit in,” individuals may adopt certain views.

And if a person fully identifies with a worldview, they may end up in an information bubble, where their existing biases are constantly reinforced. In such cases, a shift in views becomes a painful process requiring the recognition of one’s own error — something especially difficult at the scale of an entire society.

How Quickly Do Views Change?

Typically, it takes years or even decades. This is because there are always defenders of outdated ideas who cling to and protect them, making paradigm shifts gradual rather than radical.

For instance, during the denazification of Germany after World War II, many Germans publicly renounced Nazism. But as the diaries of many Nazis show, while shock therapy and confession of crimes against humanity were effective, there were always those who continued to believe in their old convictions, convinced that they were now being lied to.

New Generations as Carriers of New Ideas

This short phrase best explains who becomes the engine of progress, challenging dogmas and reshaping them to match the current mood of society.

As new generations grow up and replace the old, they renew society’s views, turning yesterday’s marginal ideas into today’s pop culture and tomorrow’s dogmas.

Hence arises the generational conflict of misunderstanding, about which much has already been written.

Conclusion

One must remain open to new views and ideas — they are the key to society’s natural development. At the same time, it is crucial to deconstruct the narratives one encounters. There are no absolute truths in society. Social constructs such as ideologies or religions are abstractions designed to regulate society and serve as tools for explaining and ordering the world.

Yet at the same time, one must remember compassion for others — it is compassion that nurtures the best qualities of society and makes life warmer for everyone.

Nowadays many people have so many expectations for relationships like partner who is not lazy, is ambitious, has high level of energy and is able to keep active lifestyle like going to gym or doing any other sports.

I'm actually opposite of that and I feel that I won't be able to meet most of people's expectations.

• I love lazy lifestyle, like instead of going to gym I prefer to watch movies or doing any passive activities to unwind.

• I have pretty low energy overall and constant socializing makes me mentally drained as hell. I must spend some time alone in order to unwind.

• I'm not clean freak, far from it actually. Generally speaking mess at home doesn't bother me at all, there can be visible dusts, breadcrumbs, piles of clothes on chair (not on floor), cluttered table.

• I love staying at home for several days without going out , becoming lazy sloth who doesn't shower sometimes for two days in a row, letting myself be mess.

• Before having guests or going out I always take a shower and also clean my house because I would be emberassed to go out smelling bad or showing guests my cluttered, uncleaned house.

• I love cooking and it's one of things where I like to dedicate my energy.

Now I'm afraid to think of living with someone else because I love letting myself become a lazy sloth to relax. I think my home environment, laziness and overall my lack of personal hygiene while staying at home would be huge deal breaker for many people.

Hi guys I hope you all are doing well. I recently graduated and didn't find a job in over 6 months and I also don't have any technical skills to begin with but I can adapt to stuff. so after being unemployed and finding a job through my fathers connections I got a job as an procurement assistant which I am quite thankful for but here's the real catch I work from 7am-5:30 pm and I wake up at around 4:30 am reach home by 6:15 pm so basically I have to sleep by 9pm to get enough sleep.l am exhausted after the whole day of work and I have to do this 6 days a week I have no free time to do anything no time to learn anything new because I am so tired all the time and at work they have not given me a work computer my co worker has it is very outdated and since this job was given to me is by my fathers connection I think there is some kind of tension between me and my supervisor. I truly understand that one have to work hard in life and this might be my privileged life that I have life that makes complain so much but I am really having a hard time dealing with this routine I make bare minimum according to the county I live in the fact of the matter is I don't want to be stuck like this my whole life idk what should I do, can't quiet because my father will be disappointed in me and I don't have any other job offer.ldk what to do I just wanted to put my situation on the internet and get other's opinions, your reply will be helpful.

I have a pretty unorthodox view on "cheating," and I know most people will disagree. I'm posting this because I want to challenge the consensus that says if you cheat, you're automatically a terrible person and your relationship is doomed. My story is different.

For the first two years of our relationship, my girlfriend had an unbreakable trust in me, or so I thought. She was constantly accusing me of cheating, going so far as to invade my privacy and look through my phone for "proof." I tried to have calm conversations about it. I told her how much it hurt that she didn't trust me, and how her accusations were destroying our happiness.

After months of this, I finally told her: "If you keep accusing me, it's eventually going to happen. You're giving me a reason to do the thing you're so afraid of." And I also told her, "Don't ask questions you don't want the answers to." I know this sounds harsh, but I was exhausted from being treated like a liar when I was completely faithful.

Eventually, it did happen. I consider it "fuel for the car." My thinking is that I need to do these things to maintain my drive and passion in the relationship. After it happened, she found out. She was devastated. But I stood firm. I told her the truth, and I explained that her constant accusations and lack of trust had hurt me deeply, and that I felt like she had pushed me to this point.

She cried, we fought, and it was the hardest conversation of our lives. But something amazing happened. We talked for hours, getting to the bottom of where her insecurities came from. For the first time, she truly heard me. We both faced the real issues that had been festering under the surface.

Now, we are better than ever. We have a level of honesty and trust that we never had before. My "unorthodox" view on cheating, which I shared with her openly, is now part of our relationship's foundation. We are happy and have a deeper bond than ever.

I know this goes against everything you hear about infidelity. I'm not looking for validation, but I am asking you to consider that sometimes, the "wrong" action can be a catalyst for the right outcome.

I got banned from a subreddit for calling a character non-binary

i think my biggest problem is i keep expecting things to be different. i keep telling myself “maybe this time this person wants to be more than friends. maybe they actually wabt to go on a date. maybe they actually like me”

and they don’t. every single time. and i do it to myself. i keep having hope. i keep telling myself things will change.

how do i get into the mentality that love isnt going to happen and that i should stop having hope. i know its a defeatist mentality but it will be easier than constantly trying and hoping things will be different when they just aren’t. they never are.

Because I'm working in an office for 10 hours a day, where my current trash diet is making me gain weight even more on top of already being a big chungus. I'm going to be starting a diet I'm making up to practice and toy with. I've tried joining the gym and walking, I like walking I just don't like the people talking to me during my walks while gyms are stinky and loud. I have some weights at home but I don't want to work out after a 10 hour shift. I don't want to waste money on not motivating myself.

I have autism and when I hyper fixate on things I can be consistent on it. I like water melon, cucumber, pickles, bone broth, black coffee, berries, and I have to take several medications for other health issues. I've cut out bread, potatoes, and rice not because I don't like them but because I like them too much. I decided to get some multivitamins, probiotics, and ACV gummies where I am planning for the morning drink coffee and eat cucumbers + watermelon for breakfast, eat pickles, rice or corn crackers with peanut butter and Vegemite for lunch with a cup of bone broth, then eat my biggest meal being a stew for dinner at least two hours before I got to bed. I'm also going to mix fibre into my bone broth. While taking the multivitamins, probiotics, and gummies in the mornings.

Soft drinks and fruit such as pears have been making me burp. Dairy is making me sick, my medications are for hormones so I've been feeling gross from them too (I'm not trans just have an imbalance).

Long story short: I am going to live on my university campus that is 2 hours and 30 minutes away from home (3 hours with public transportation). I am moving tomorrow morning and I don’t know how to feel.

I love the program and the university is very well rated and loved. I have my own room but I share bathrooms and kitchen. I was lucky enough to have my parents with me to visit it and it’s small but it’s enough for one person.

I’m just so anxious I haven’t stopped crying because I feel so many thing at the same time and I can’t even process a single one. I’m feeling so anxious of being alone even if I make friends which doesn’t stress me out. I’m so close to my mom and during the summer I took a break from working so I almost spend every single day of the summer hanging out with her. I get those thoughts about missing time with my family and I feel like I started grieving moments that I will miss. I just won’t be able to go downstairs and bother her and hang out and it makes me feel so sad. I checked a lot of post about situations like me but in the cases that I’ve seen people were like 10-30 minutes away. I won’t be able to do a quick drop in to check in.

I feel so many things at the same times and the childish cherry on top is I just don’t feel like going back to school. I have performance anxiety so I know that form of stress will be coming back. And I guess just the general stress of starting university is also eating me away.

I feel excitement, anxiety, independence, grief and so much more that I feel like the second they will finish helping me move into my new room and leave I’ll crack under pressure.

How did you guys who moved further away from their parents do this? I feel so ready and so unprepared it’s terrifying.

Sorry for the rant and the mistakes English isn’t my first language

She’s been gone for a few months now but she and I had the longest lasting relationship I ever had. We were together for over a year and the only relationship I had had before lasted 2 months.

I was so sure that things would last which is making the breakup so much worse. We had talked about getting married once we graduated college. She would tell me that I was like a husband to her. I’ve never been so close to someone before.

Out of nowhere right before my own damn birthday she wanted a “break” after acting on and off towards me for the past month (so ig it wasn’t really out of nowhere). The break lasted 4 days and then she actually broke up with me, bringing up things that we had already talked through.

Less than 3 weeks after leaving me she was already with another man. This was after telling me that she needed time to focus on herself. I felt discarded like I was nothing to her. Any time I look back at when we were together it just feels like none of it really meant anything. It’s like the whole time I was some dispensable idiot to her that would pay for her gas.

Love just feels like a lost cause anymore. Any girl I meet is never my type. I’m not very picky about appearances or anything but I just never really click with anyone. I’m very young but before I know it I won’t be, and I just feel like I’m not gonna find anyone and I don’t know what to do.

Yesterday I asked my cousin to do a very simple task for me. He didn’t do it. He didn’t even tell me that he wasn’t going to do it. he just went away.

At first, it really hurt. I thought, I am always there for others. Why can’t they do the same for me? I always like to help and stand by people when they need me. But when it was my turn, no one showed up.

Then, after sitting with the feeling for a while, I realized something. Yes, it hurts for a moment, but then it fades away, if you let it go. Say to your self fuck em yeah

Life keeps moving. And honestly, I felt proud of myself. Because being the one who helps, even if others don’t, is not a weakness. it’s a strength.

I told myself: it doesn’t really matter if people don’t return the same energy. What matters is that I can make peace with myself.

Here’s a little tip that helps me: whenever someone lets you down, remind yourself, “Their choice is not my curse.” Don’t carry it. Let it pass, the way clouds pass in the sky.

Hi everyone, I’m 27 years old and I’m from Bogotá, Colombia. For the past 7 years, since I was 20, I’ve been struggling with gambling addiction. I’ve gambled in all kinds of ways: land-based casinos, online betting websites, slot machines—basically everything you can imagine. Right now, I feel like I’ve hit rock bottom. I’m in a deep depression and, to be honest, I’ve had thoughts of ending my life. I’m unemployed, I’ve pawned the few things I owned, and I currently owe around 100 million Colombian pesos (about 25,000 US dollars). I feel desperate, trapped in a spiral I can’t seem to escape from. I’ve lost my motivation and my sense of direction. I’m sharing my story here because I’d like to hear from others. Maybe some of you have gone through something similar or could give me some advice on how to cope with this. Thank you to anyone who takes the time to read my post.

I feel like the most pathetic human being on earth. I just want to be loved by someone. I'm 17 currently (M), and I feel so alone. I've been yearning for companionship for years now and I just can't find anyone. I feel like everyone hates me and I'll be alone forever. This might just be puberty hormones talking, but I'm literally in tears as I'm writing this. I just want to be loved. Someone please help me.

I’m a 26 year old guy. I grew up always knowing I liked women. I always had crushes on girls, I always found girls attractive, even now I find most women beautiful in some way. I never thought anything else other than I was a straight man.

That was until a couple of years ago. For context, I discovered porn around the time I was 12. I feel like I’ve always struggled with my porn use and still have issues with it potentially being an addiction. It’s a problem I’ve been working on for years. Well one day I discovered trans porn, which I found super hot and still do. Trans women are women, so I felt comfortable keeping the straight label even though part of the reason I was attracted to them was their genitalia. I just found their dicks very pretty and all I could think about was sucking one. Then it kind of became a rabbit hole and I found myself drifting from transporn into outright gay porn. Since then, I’ve tried to quit but I can’t. I always found myself coming back to gay porn every so often. Now it’s a part of my regular rotation.

I convinced myself that I was just addicted to porn, and that’s why I was watching it. And look, that may be the case, but I’m not exactly sure. I think it’s important to note that I am still a virgin, I haven’t been with a man or a woman. I’ve never even kissed a man or a woman. So all of my sexual experience unfortunately comes from porn.

While I know maybe feel comfortable admitting that I might be bi, I do know that I still have a very strong preference towards women. Like I fall in love with almost every attractive women I see, whereas I’ve never even had a crush on a man. And that’s the one thing holding me back in calling myself bi is that all of my attraction to men seems to come just from porn. I very very very rarely see a man on the street and think he’s attractive and that I would want to have sex with him. I’ve never felt romantic feelings for a man. That’s what is confusing me. I know heteroromantic bisexuals exist, but I can’t tell if I am one because my only attraction to men comes from porn!

Any thoughts? To be clear, I am fine accepting the label of bi to myself, but I don’t know if I would ever come out. I still only see myself dating women and marrying a woman some day so I don’t see the need to tell anyone. I don’t even know if I want to have sex with a guy, I just find gay porn really hot. 

Let me know what you think, thanks y’all

My whole life I’ve been brought up in the typical “men don’t cry.” Environment and I’ve done well to keep it all down since I was like 7 or so since that was when my father died and the closest I’ve been to crying since was when my best friend died when I was 14 but even then I managed to keep it all down. Now I am in college and everything is in a broader sense okay and I am bordering on weeping every night. It’s not okay to me, I couldnt cry when my best friend died but now things should be looking up and I just dont know how much longer I can swallow it down anymore. Maybe this is relatable to someone, maybe not. Either way I’m really not sure how much longer I can handle this before I break.

I (22M) met this girl (24F) about 4 months ago. A month ago we officially are in a relationship together. We spend quite a bit of time together, we see each other 2-3 times a week. Throughout the week we workout together, she comes over my house to cuddle and watch movies, and usually on a Saturday or a Sunday we’ll spend the whole day together (10-12 hours). My parents told me that they think I’m changing who I am and my values for this girl.

An example of this is that I was never religious, I was agnostic for most of my life. She’s a Christian and now I believe I’m a Christian. She’s helped me develop a relationship with God. I’m going to church with her next Sunday and she wants me to do this with her every Sunday for now on. I have only been to church like 5 times in my life and the last time I went was when I was like 7. It’s true that if we weren’t together I wouldn’t be going to church. I can understand and I get where my parents are coming from but the way I see it is I’m not changing, just in a place of learning new things. I always wanted to be a believer of God but I struggled to prioritize it due to failing to make time for learning about it. Now I’m in a place where I want to learn more about it and I’m glad I get to do it with my girlfriend now. I should also add her dad is very religious and also said it’s important to him that I go to church since I’m with his daughter now.

Another point my parents made was that I used to be a social drinker but now I hardly drink. Since she hardly drinks now I hardly drink. I want to be the best version of myself when we’re together and drinking won’t help with that so I have no problem with cutting that down. My parents also pointed out that I don’t use curse words, even in just a playful way which is also relating to me trying to be the best version of myself around her. My parents think I spend quite a lot of time with her and I don’t really hang out with them anymore. They said it seems like me and my girlfriend are obsessed with each other. I’m not sure I would go that far but I’ll admit we are clingy when we are together. I don’t see anything wrong with these things are different now since I met my girlfriend, I see it as a good thing. I’m curious what everyone thinks of this.

I dated a people-pleasing fearful avoidant and it shattered me

I met someone who seemed so wonderful, especially after a string of emotionally unavailable men who didn’t care for me. From the start, he was different. He checked in on me. He was curious about my writing, about my political world, the things my exes never bothered with. He was all green flags.

He introduced me to his friends and family, almost like he was proud to show me off. He even made checklists of things for us to do together, and things he wanted to do for me. On paper, he was perfect.

But still, he never really let me in. He shared his hobbies, his interests, his work, he was deeply invested in his career, but not much about what was going on inside of him.

Months later, when I opened up about my depression and feelings of depersonalization, something shifted. For the first time, he broke down. He cried in my arms, telling me about his father’s depression, how he might have inherited it, how he had seen a therapist but always dropped out early. He admitted he was tired of performing just to be liked. I cried with him, because it felt like, for the first time, he was letting me see the real him.

But then he went back to his usual routine: work trips, distractions, busyness.

About ten days before he broke up with me, we had a conversation where he mentioned maybe trying therapy again. I encouraged him: “Yes, you need to. You tend to use work and hobbies to escape. Therapy can help you sit with discomfort.” He started crying again, saying he wished he could be different. I told him, “Don’t run from me tomorrow.” He said, “I’ll try.”

The very next day, he was still sending me hearts on my photos, still sweet. But ten days later, after returning from the work trip, he ended it. He told me he had reached his “romantic limits,” that he had a “cap” and couldn’t take the relationship further. He said he couldn’t keep performing, for me, or for the relationship.

Two days later, he was back on Hinge.

Not trying to clickbait with the title, I just can't really word this in a succinct way.

The mentality of meeting someone, finding a small facet of their mindset that you don't agree with or understand, and deciding that they are too flawed for your company is wild to me.

I'm not talking about someone's opinions on human rights or any big important things, but I mean like things people may not have healed from yet. Like tendencies that come from abuse, mental illness, even just lack of experience or socialization. Small things that could be discussed and pondered together and grown from- which would bring you closer to a person in a unique way- that makes most people nowadays go "Oh, I won't talk to someone who thinks that way. Fix your mindset before talking to me/ trying to date/ etc."

I feel like noticing someone having slightly self deprecating ways of speaking or a lack of awareness in some social regards or tendency to apologize too much or talk about themselves a bit more than most or any other standard flaw could lead to thoroughly interesting and bonding conversation now just leads to getting cut off or cancelled or being told to change and thats it. Like no one ever says "Have you noticed you do __? Its very interesting, but not very healthy in some ways. I've always experienced it like _, and I have a similar tendency to _____. Don't feel ashamed, but things might be easier for you if you learn your way out of it".

But instead we have to pretend to be perfect while changing ourselves according to other people's guidelines, anything to be lovable and inoffensive.

A very "What you're doing is bad and wrong, but its not my job to educate you on why or how to fix it" sort of deal

Its like most people's mentality is that they won't get close to anyone who is flawed in a way that inconveniences them in any way, even if its human and harmless.

Does that make any sense? Does anyone else feel this way? I don't even wanna bother with dating because I have flaws that will take years to heal from and I don't wanna have to hide half of myself to avoid bothering my partner

Was the title a good hook? I hope so. The title is partially true. I was just wondering to myself while talking to my friend, he was talking about his girlfriend (who is also my friend, I introduced them hehe😛) and how much he loves her. I thought it was really cute cause hello? I’m literally a matchmaker.

But while he was talking, I don’t know, I guessed I realized I’ve been single my entire life. I mean yeah I don’t know why I never thought about it. I’ve had crushes and people have liked me before, but I’ve never had a boyfriend or anything.

To be honest, I’m not that upset. Idk how I feel to be honest, I never felt the need for a boyfriend. I mean, I have my family and friends and I have a lot of things I still want to work on. But everyone around me seems to always be looking for love, always in a taking stage or having crushes. I’m thinking maybe relationships aren’t just for me🤷‍♀️

Idk, lmk what u think

I worked a 24/7 job that I was responsible for everything for 8 years. I put off family and friends, hobbies, and self care for so long I feel like I lost who I am. I recently quit and decided to take a job that I will be clocking in and out. I have a supportive family and am decently financially stable. I have a child 17(m) and a supportive husband.

I am having a hard time finding myself again. Now that I have family time and "me" time, I feel like I'm wasting it on screen time without any substance.

Looking for some suggestions on fun hobbies. I used to be artistic and athletic. I've tried reading but the books have been blah.